Ask Dr. Dot …… Jan. 9th 2007

Feel free to send me your questions. I never use anyone's real name, so don't be shy…



I am dating a college guy, who seems like a potential long-term partner. All of his friends
are married (which is a good sign) and when he invites me out on dates, it’s usually with
 a few other couples. Last time the husbands were very friendly to me and I got bitchy
vibes from the wives. I can’t help it if I am like one of the guys—I am fun. It’s been a
week since I heard from him and I sense it could be due to the ice storm from the wives—they
 may have scathed their husbands and him for having such a social girlfriend. I also told him
in a drunken moment that I am only interested in having fun and not looking for anything serious.
 How can I make things better? I don’t want to lose him.

—Skated on Thin Ice


It’s great that he hangs with relationship minded couples and a good sign that he brings you
into his social circle. One on one dating is already nerve wracking but when you toss in a few
bitchy females and flirty males it becomes a complicated high school style Bitch-fest. Let him
contact you first, as nothing keeps a man away from a woman he adores, not even a challenging
 comment like “I don’t want anything serious.” When he does contact you (if he doesn’t,
it’s his loss) tell him you love being with him but are too shy for group dates. If he insists,
 agree but tell him you would prefer just drinks or just dinner and to look for your “lets leave”
 glance because you can’t wait to get him alone to suck his cock. Just be yourself and if the
ladies don’t like you, they will hopefully ban their husbands from dates that include you,
 saving you from being the complicated nag.

My new boyfriend leaves stuff behind every time he comes over to fuck me. He also leaves a mess
 in my kitchen. Everything else is perfect. How can I tame this cave man?

—Tidy Tess


He is marking his territory, and if he is the only one you are dating/shagging, find a corner
or drawer for his left behind “markings” and if that is only bad thing he does is leave a mess
 in your kitchen, consider your self lucky, it’s not even worth mentioning. Let it slide and
save the bitching for important things like cheating, blatantly drooling over other women in
your presence or making you buy your own dinner/drinks.



I’m not sure how to handle this situation.  I am engaged to a woman who
used to have a 4 year relationship with another woman.  Everything
couldn’t be better with her accept I have a small concern which I have to
say does not affect how I feel about her I love her dearly.  I fully
satisfy her sexually, whether it be through intercourse, oral sex or a
good ol masturbation.  The intercourse is Great!!  She on the other hand
has given me maybe three blow jobs which she did not finish off, and one
hand job, during the span of almost 2 years. I don't want to sound like I
am complaining and being selfish.  That is furthest from the truth.  I
THINK I could live without those things it's just like missing out on a
bit of fun.  Now, we have agreed no intercourse until we are married which
is about three months away.  Again, I have satisfied her sexual hunger in
every other way, and she has not even put her hand on my member, so
needless to say, I am experiencing a bit of sexual frustration.  How do I
handle this other that coming right out with it.  "Why don't you suck my
dick!?"  I don't see that working to well.  I don't doubt her love for me
at all, I just think she may still be a bit repulsed with the thought of
putting my dick in her mouth or jerking me off.  How do I tactfully deal
with this?


Blue Balls

shagging is fun, but nothing beats oral pleasure


You confuse me; you say "The intercourse is great" then you say "we
have agreed to no intercourse before marriage". Wtf? She was fucking you
but now suddenly, no sex (apart from you licking her out on a regular basis)
until you walk down aisle with her?
What we have here is a woman who doesn't appreciate your cock enough to do
to it what a cock loves the most, getting head. Asking "Why don't you suck my
dick?" is a perfect question, it hits the nail right on the head, but maybe you have to
rephrase it a bit. I have said this before, but maybe you missed it, just stop
going down on her and when she asks why, say "good question, I was going to
ask you the same thing, why the lack of oral sex?".
3 unfinished blow jobs in 4 years, now no hot beef injections until marriage
 and you STILL want to marry her? Her pussy must
be lined with velvet my friend. Be a man and speak up about your normal, healthy oral sex
craving and find out before you take the leap if you are in for a life time of
this one sided oral sex routine BULLSHIT. Sounds to me like you are settling. If you marry
her you may end up cheating to get your cock sucked elsewhere, so think hard about this,
you need to step up to the plate before it's too late.

 I'm dating this girl and last night on my way home from a business meeting and I drove by her
 house (it's on the way to my house from that part of town, I'm not a stalker) our subdivisions
 are close to each other. Anyway her long term ex-boyfriend was at her house. It was like 10 PM.
 That made me kinda nervous because I spoke to her an hour before that and she said she was in
bed and getting ready to go to sleep. So now I'm kinda bummed out. She called me a little while
ago this morning and she said she was tired and I asked her what time she went to sleep and she
said like 9 ish. I was trying to quiz her hoping that she wouldn't lie to me and didn't mention
that I drove by her house. I'm mostly bothered because I feel like she's lying to me. It doesn't
 bother me that she was hanging out, even though the ex bf thing makes me skeptical. 
How do I handle a situation like this?
You are my hero,
Pissed off Paul



If she was in bed with him, sleeping, then she isn't a liar, just a two timing cunt. Heh heh.
No, seriously it could be she is just dating more than one guy.
Since you are only "dating" I would keep my options wide open, (pun intended) like she is, and
 instead of wasting energy on someone you now know you can't trust, take that energy and go out
and meet other girls. Is she really worth all the hassle?
If you DO decide to confront her, make sure it's in person, so you can see her face and watch for
 tell tale signs of lying (pathetic shocked look on red face; going into extreme details and
having your questions mainly answered with questions). Be prepared for her to say she is seeing
other men but there is still no excuse for her lying to you and if you tell her how you know, she
will think you have been stalking her. I would just move on and play the field, but if you do shag
her again, make sure you have condoms with you.

I have made a foe par on quiet a large scale. I was on the phone to my girlfriend of 6 months,
 as the conversation came to the end I blurted out 'I love ya'… it wasn't even 'I love you’ but
 'ya' . She promptly squeaked and we both hung up! I feel like such a fuck face, it's such a
silly way to say those words for the first time, but it just happened.  It’s not the kind of
thing I say lightly at all; I really do feel it for her. I just thought when I told her if would
 be  a) a little bit later on b) in a much better way.
 My wonderful male intuition doesn't give me much of an idea if she feels the same, or how I can
 come back from this situation with my head held high. What’s the best course of action? WTF?

Terrible Call Terry


Be grateful she didn't say it first, as that would be even more difficult. It would be best not
 to mention your slip up, just say it again the next time you two are doing the dirty. Rolling
 around on top of each other is a great atmosphere for professing one's love. If she doesn't
say it back but keeps dating you and everything else is fine, it could mean she is just the
type who takes her time with that. I know people who never say it and who could blame them?
 Actions are always more important than words in a relationship.

My wife reads you religiously and I need some help, I have a great wife who loves me to no
end and I have a relationship most would be jealous of, my problem is I am a porn junkie
dating back to before I knew her, She just found a bunch of adds that I printed from,
 I never act on them or call any of the girls but I do email back and forth to them and she has
seen this. I love her with all my heart, we have a very active sex life 3-4 times a week and she
is always willing to experiment with me in the bedroom, we have been married for 18 years and I
am still very much attracted to her, I just don't know why I am so curious to go back to this site.
Junk Junkie

Some images are hard to resist ^


Because you're a man. You didn't mention her reaction. I think looking at porn is fine; communicating
with these girls from your past is rude to your wife. How would you like her keeping in touch with
 hot men from her past, just to be "friends"? Always turn the situation around and put yourself in
the other person's shoes. Watching is fine, actively keeping in touch while married is pushing the envelope.

I want to try talking dirty to my boyfriend, as I like it when a guy talks dirty to me in bed. We have
slept together a few times already and unfortunately, he hasn't even come close to dirty talk. He is 24
 and I am 21, and he is rather shy but great in bed. How do I introduce dirty talk in bed without
coming across as, well, a pushy, dirty whore.
Dirty Dana

Speaking your mind is refreshing ….

Get him to mount you, doggy style, as there is less pressure when you are not eye to eye and say
 "fuck me harder", see his reaction, if he goes with it, then toss in a few other lines
like "my pussy LOVES you in there" etc, and hopefully after a few rounds of you being vocal, he will
 know it's safe to try it as well. You may have to ask him to talk dirty to you, as some men respect
 women so much that are hesitant to blurt out "you like that you dirty bitch?" to a girl. Say it
over drinks one night that it would really turn you on if he spoke dirty to you in bed, this will
 give him a chance to tell you if he likes it or not as asking him during sex may make him feel
obligated and/or cornered if he really doesn't like it.