Author: Dr. Dot

While trying to stop the war, one can work up one hell of an appetite, so I have been going out to eat a lot lately and decided to take notes and pass them onto you, check it out:

1) Gabriel’s   Bar and Restaurant 

</street />( between  Broadway and Columbus) tel: 212 956-4600

I went to Gabriel’s for the second time last week and was impressed for the second time. Gabriel’s is upper class, even though I got away with wearing sneakers. They boast they are the “winner of the wine spectator award of excellence” from 1997 to the present.

It is an Italian restaurant with gorgeous decor and atmosphere. I love the roasted head of garlic they serve and the salads, bread and chicken are delicious. Check it out:

http://www.gabrielsbarandrest.com/ 

The web site is so cool, you can take a virtual tour of the place, sniff it out you know, to see if it is up to bar for you and your date. Count on at least $100 for two, and dress nice.

2)Aureole  34 East 61st Street tel. 212 319 1660

 One of the best meals, well, no, actually THE best meal I have ever had was last Saturday night. It was kind of a business meeting that turned out to be kick ass. A client and new found friend of mine, Amir   invited me to what has got to be NYC’s most expensive restaurant. We had to wait at the bar for our table, so champagne was ordered. I am not much of a drinker, but could you say no to a $285 bottle of 1995 Dom Perignon ? Didn’t think so.  Even the bread sticks were gourmet! (note:above photo of Amir and I was taken later at a karaoke joint, you have to wear a tie at the restaurant).

  Click HERE to see the web site.

I had the vegetarian menu, which was about $150. It came with 7 courses. They were all small but packed with so much flavor and so rich, they fill you up. The service was the best I have ever had and they give you a dessert tray of pralines and other fattening but mouth watering exotic chocolate crimes to keep you busy while the real dessert is being prepared.

If I would have known 7 meals were heading my way, I would have fasted for the whole week before. For the most expensive and  gorgeous eating experience of your life, I HIGHLY recommend Aureole.

3) Mexican Radio – 19 Cleaveland place tel:212-343-0140

By FAR the best Mexican Restaurant I have been to. Their Guacamole rivals mine and that means it is DAM good.                 The service is a tad too friendly, the waitress starting going ON and ON about her life to the point where I was falling asleep into my black beans, BUT better too friendly then bitchy like Berliner waitresses I suppose. The food is so amazing; you will forget the clingy, over- friendly -for -the- tip waitress in no time.

Anyone will look gorgeous in the lighting, it is warm and flattering and the walls are colorful eye candy. They have a web site with full menus, click HERE to see it.

It is fairly priced and the margaritas are by far the best I have ever had. I don’t drink often, or much, but if I do, it will be for 1)great wine 2) $300 a bottle champagne 3) Mexican Radio’s margaritas! Yeah baby! If you tell the staff you are psychotic, hence, “handicapped” you can use the bathroom upstairs, other wise it is a hike down stairs to the can.

On my site www.drdot.com  in the VIDEOS section, there is now a 4th video to view; it is the UK show I did back in October, demonstrating the bite method and all. By the way, if you come to me for massage and want the Bite Method, tell me BEFORE I cover you will oil, otherwise it won’t happen. I won’t bite an oily back, it would make me feel like I am nibbling on sardines and you KNOW I hate FISH!

Have you seen the latest issue of PEOPLE magazine? Well, I will massage Chris Botti; he is in the new issue of People, voted as one of the “50 Most Beautiful People”. You may recall me writing about him back in my blog in March. Click on his photo to get to his fabulous web site    

Anyways, I will massage him today (Friday) in front of TV cameras for the show NBC “Access Hollywood” . They are interviewing me about how important massage is for artists and will ask Chris how it feels and hopefully he will moan “awesome, she rocks!” or something similar. I promised Chris a few free massages for his kindness; not easy to get a star to let someone film their massage session! Yes, massaging such a babe is hard work, but someone has to do it.

Great thing about Chris is his sense of humor and taste in music. Yes, he is eye candy, but he is wicked fun to hang out with AND generous! I forgot to tell you, that time I massaged Sting in Atlantic City, Chris was back stage giving out chocolate covered fruit. Apparently a certain fan of his gives him this HUGE platter of top notch chocolate covered berries, pineapple, bananas etc, and it is too much for him bring on the plane, so he is so sweet, he was even going up to the security and roadies and offering them some of his delicious gift. I wolfed down most of it ( hee hee, just joking- I had a few strawberries).

My assistant Felicia (see my site to see her) and long time partner in crime Lisa ( remember her, I wrote about her last august when she ripped open her freakin THUMB- go to blog entries August 27 and 28th to see Lisa and perhaps there is a few photos of Felicia singing “I’ve got friends in low places” standing on a table at a CT karaoke club 🙂

Where was I? Oh yes, Felicia and Lisa will pick me up in a quasi “limo” around 3pm and we will all shoot over to Chris’s flat to film. If the NBC director wants to film Chris getting the 4 handed massage, Felicia will be on hand, if not, the girls will shop till they drop until I finish filming. Then we will all go to a few of the Tri Beca Film Festival parties I was invited to. The girls have never heard of the film fest, and if you haven’t and are curious, click HERE to check it out. Robert Deniro is the host of the festival this year, would love to run into him, he is one of my favorite actors.

I will let you know when the NBC /Access Hollywood thing will be aired and post cool photos of the shoot.

Before I go, I want to dedicate a song by my hero, Frank Zappa, called “When the lie’s so big” enjoy:

They got lies so big                                      
They don’t make a noise
They tell ’em so well
Like a secret disease
That makes you go numb

With a big ol’ lie
And a flag and a pie
And a mom and a bible
Most folks are just liable
To buy any line
Any place, any time

When the lie’s so big
And the fog gets so thick
And the facts disappear
The Republican Trick
Can be played out again
People, please tell me when
We’ll be rid of these men!

Just who do they really
Suppose that they are?
And how did they manage to travel as far
As they seem to have come?
Were we really that dumb?

People, wake up
Figure it out
Religious fanatics
Around and about
The Court House, The State House,
The Congress, The White House

Criminal saints
With a “Heavenly Mission” —
A nation enraptured
By pure superstition

When the lie’s so big
And the fog gets so thick
And the facts disappear
The Republican Trick
Can be played out again
People, please tell me when
We’ll be rid of these men!  –

Frank Zappa

Dr. Dot

I read the German and British papers online everyday, just to see what their version of the news is, usually they have a more realistic version of what is going on.

 In the US, no matter what TV channel you watch or what paper you read, you will NOT get the gory details of the War in Iraq, because if the media did that, no one would want to volunteer to go fight for their country. 

If we are only shows tiny pieces of the truth, perhaps Bush will get re-elected (that is what the government hopes). I am totally against this war, HATE it that Bush is in the White House and think that if Americans see more of what is going on, they might get so sick to their stomachs, that they just might get off their asses and vote that war happy fucker out of the White House.

Above, see the British Soldier pissing on the Iraqi prisoner. Next, see Iraqi prisoners made to lie naked on top of each other while the American soldiers have a laugh.  (*note: I am not feeling pity for Iraqi soldiers, I feel pity for anyone involved in a war)

Normally I wanted to write about the incredible restaurant I was invited to the other night and fill you in on what I have been up to, but seeing the news the last few days and reading the news online has made me almost cripple with grief. Yes, I am a hippie at heart, peace and love baby, and usually I don’t like to cram my political views down anyone’s throat, but something has got to change or this will be the next Vietnam.

If you have not registered yet to vote, please do so by clicking  HERE

Peace

Dr. Dot

a magazine called “You gotta read this” did an interview with me, felt liberating:

This time the big boss of Universal, who produces the 5th Wheel, wrote me and assured me this time it will REALLY be on!

If you stay up LATE next Friday night, which is April 30th, stay up until 1am(which is technically May 1st), and you are just channel surfing, why not have a look at that show, the 5th wheel. I put a lot of time and effort into filming the episode I was on, and it is worth watching. Now, I must say, I know they can use those cartoon like pop up windows and antics to take the piss out of someone on the show if they (producers/editors) didn’t like one of the people on the show, but as far as I know, it went WELL and it was a very sarcastic atmosphere, everyone at eachother’s throats and groins.

If you want to see what I wrote about  the show, click HERE and to see WHO is on the show click  HERE .

I put some really funny photos in that last “HERE” and made fun of the other contestants, it is all part of the vibe there, it is very competitive! By the time they threw me into the 5th Wheel van, the other contestants had already been together the whole day, the females had already showed their tits to the guys and they had already made out with eachother etc.

So it was up to me to convince one of those guys to leave their nasty girls for me. I did this without showing any skin or kissing anyone. Words are oh so powerful!

To find out the local channel that will air this episode, click HERE . I am taking a risk here, as they may have well twisted it all around in their editing techniques, but what the hell, have a look, have a laugh. The “man magnet” they are writing about is me. They tell all people who are picked to be the “5th WHEEL” to do a short 2 minute monologue about themselves, that would purposely provocate and annoy the other contestants, to stir things up. They really DO tell you to be outrageous and to stir things up. So that is what became of my little clip. They let the two couples spend all day together, swapping partners, and getting all cozy with one another, then they sit them all down in the van and show them all the little video of who the 5th Wheel will be that day.

Naturally the females watching the film are already loathing me and are ready to rip my hair out before I even get onto the van! So, immediately after showing the clip, they throw the 5th Wheel in, this time being me.

You have to be very confident, hold your own, as they all want to verbally rough you up, all at once. After my roughing up on the Howard Stern show back in March 6, 2002 ( in which I did hold my own as good as one can against a room full of obnoxious, agressive PIGS) I have learned to never let that shit happen again, so I was ready and we had a sharp exchange of words, it was fucking funny!

I will be up watching and if I stay up and wait for the show and it doesn’t come on again, I will just give up on ever seeing it. So this is the last time I plus this friggin’ show on the blog. If it comes on and you see it, email me your comments – the good, bad and the ugly ones too.

Dr.

“If you like Fuckin’, marriage ain’t for you!”

My face hurts from watching Chris Rock’s new special “Never Scared” on HBO. It is the funniest shit I have seen since his last special “Bigger and Blacker”. He is definately at the top of my wish list, as to who I would like to massage and hang with. Glad I am not the only one who is against the idea of marriage. It is old fashioned and makes people too comfortable. You just try harder when you are just in love without a contract.

A poem for females….

 I shave my legs,

 I sit down to pee.

 And I can justify

 any shopping spree.

 Don’t go to a barber,

 but a beauty salon.

 I can get a massage

 without a hard-on.

 I can balance the checkbook,

 I can pump my own gas.

 Can talk to my friends,

 about the size of my ass.

 My beauty’s a masterpiece,

 and yes, it takes long.                                                                                                  

 At least I can admit,

 to others when I’m wrong.

 I don’t drive in circles,

 at any cost.

 And I don’t have a problem,

 admitting I’m lost.

 I never forget,

 an important date.

 You just gotta deal with it,

 I’m usually late.

 I don’t watch movies,

with lots of gore.

 Don’t need instant replay, 

 to remember the score.

 I won’t lose my hair,

 I don’t get jock itch.

 And just cause I’m assertive,

 Don’t call me a bitch.                                                                             

 Don’t say to your friends,

 Oh yeah, I can get her.

 In your dreams, my dear,

 I can do better!

 Flowers are okay,

 But jewelry’s best.

 Look at me you idiot…

 Not at my chest????

 I don’t have a problem,

 With Expressing my feelings.

 I know when you’re lying,

 You look at the ceiling.

 DON’T call me a GIRL ,

 a BABE or a CHICK .

 I am a WOMAN.

 Get it?, you DICK!?!

             The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
                 You only have to shave your face and neck.
                   You can play with toys all your life.
                  Your belly usually hides your big hips.
         One wallet and one pair of shoes, one color, all seasons.
             You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
                You can “do” your nails with a pocketknife.
         You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
             You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives…
                      on December 24… in 45 minutes.
                        No wonder men are happier!!!

Hi Dr. Dot,

Wolves in Alaska are still running for their lives, but I                     
personally wanted to thank you. With Defenders of
Wildlife, we have already raised over $80,000 and
generated an additional 30,000 petition signatures
demanding that Alaska’s Governor Murkowski end the
savage aerial killing of wolves.

Despite our efforts so far, unbelievably, the killing
continues. We are more committed than ever to ending
this barbaric slaughter. We need your help to step up
our public education and mobilization advertising
campaign calling for an end to aerial gunning which
will run in major newspapers across the country.

Support our efforts here: http://www.care2.com/go/z/13454

Plans for the next ten days include:
** Purchasing ad space in editions of The Washington
Post, USA Today and the Los Angeles Times that will
reach over 1.5 million and help us to reach our goal
of 100,000 petitions. Launching an email mobilization
campaign that will go to over 900,000 wildlife activists
and supporters. See ad: http://www.care2.com/go/z/13503

** The public must understand the brutal nature of
chasing down wolves from airplanes until they are too
tired to run any further. They need to know how wolf
packs suffer when their family members are shot
point-blank, too exhausted to escape.

Our goal is to raise another $45,000 by Earth Day, 4/22,
to place more ads and expand our public outreach and
mobilization campaign. We need your help.
Go to: http://www.care2.com/go/z/13454

Thank you for caring,
Randy Paynter
President, Care2 &
The Petition Site

PS. When I hear about these sickening wolf hunts, I feel better
knowing that so many of you are out there who also care.
Thank you so much for your help — it makes me proud to
be a part of such an amazing community.

You can help here: http://www.care2.com/go/z/13454

The last few days have been so gorgeous, even the buildings in the city are basking in the long awaited sun.

You get the idea, gorgeous weather, nice breeze through Central Park. I walked by the Dakota, where that ASSHOLE shot John Lennon on my way to the park. There are always people gathered out front, no matter what time of day or night. They are there to show love. I roller-bladed around the park one time, which is 7 miles. Dodging the many bikers and horse drawn carts, dogs on LONG leashes etc.

There were so many people on the Grand Lawn, I looked to see if Bob Dylan was in the middle somewhere playing or something, but no, just a normal sunny day in the park- packed full and happy.

I find the biggest problem in the park for women is finding a place to pee. There are only two places that I know of to go to and the lines are about a block long, so forget it. You can’t find a private bush or hope to drop your knickers real quick and have a pee without anyone seeing you, both ideas are absolutely impossible. There are always people around no matter what square inch of land you find in the park. I had to go to like 110th street ( which I think is already Harlem) and ask the NYC Bus Department  if I could roller-blade in and use their bathroom. I was the only white cracker around for miles, but they let me. I personally never saw the black/white thing. I get along with anyone until they give me a good reason not to. After I used the bathroom, the bus drivers ( all black) were shootin’ the breeze with me, asking me to show them how to skate someday. I told them I can’t drive a bus, so we are even. We had a few laughs and I was off. Thinking the whole time how wierd it is that from almost one block to the next you go from million dollar apartments to Harlem, where it is obvious the people struggle for every dime they earn. I feel safe no matter where I go to, as the people can sense that I do not think I am better or worse then they are. It is all about how you carry yourself. Use your body language to let people know “he, it’s all good, let’s get along and forget this class/color bullshit!”.

Anyhow, after skating, I had a bit to eat at Dallas BBQ on 72nd street ( almost corner of Central Park West- near Dakota) and thought, why not let you know where my favorite places to eat are and maybe some favorite places to go etc, in the city. If you knew HOW fucking picky I am in restaraunts, you would know that if I suggest a place, it IS GOOD. I am no diva, but I can cook really well and if I go out to eat, it had better be much better than what I can cook or at least have perfect service. So, for food here we go:

Dallas BBQ ( think they have 5 or 6 locations just in Manhattan alone but the one on 72nd street is REALLY clean and has amazing service probably because of the neighborhood it is in, they want to be ready for when Mike Tyson pops in again)

Dallas BBQ is rather inexpenisve AND gives you huge portions, like this obnoxious thing they call the ONION LOAF:

Can you see how BIg this thing is?  

I had to whip out my camera and take photos, prompting everyone around to laugh their asses off. I wondered how many calories are in that heap of onions and fat. It could feed a small country, it is about a foot tall! Anyways, they have BBQ ribs, chicken, baked potatoes, fries, corn bread, all that stuff and more ( I ate a salad and some of that Onion Mountain and was so full, I had to take my BBQ home and I just ate it, it was AWESOME). So, if you want down home cookin’ in the city and don’t want to spend a fortune ( or dress up) go to Dallas BBQ. You can stuff yourself for under $10!

Moving right along.

Yaffa Cafe: 97 St. Marks place between First ave and Ave A.

This place is open 24/7 everyday! You can get eggs, pancakes, salads, pasta, seafood, crab cakes, and incredible desserts. The best part about this place is the famous decor.It has paintings of Elvis, plastic friut everywhere, gilded statues and big tacky fountain out back for when the weather is fine. There is not one square inch of wall that isn’t decorated, so you will always have something to chat about. The prices are great! Again, you can have a meal, dessert and drink for under $15. Love it!

Sala: 344 Bowery at Great Jones street 1-212-979-6606 ( you may have to reserve a table on weekends).

This place is a bit pricey, average main course is about $17 ( not including drinks and tip!). I love it because it is an extremely romantic place, huge wooden doors that make you think you are entering a castle and it is lit up by candles everywhere. It is a Spanish restaraunt that has a breath taking wine list.Bread topped with garlicky saute’et mushrooms are just one of the many tasty tapas you can order. They have a downstairs lounge that has an almost Moorish setting of bead-encrusted blue tiled walls and most of the week they have a cool DJ there to entertain while you sip gorgeous wine. Anyone looks good here in the lighting and even the tables are covered in colored tiles that make up for the perfect setting for a date. Yummy, gorgeous, but expensive. Expect to pay around $65 for two people (or more if you drink a lot). Very polite service but tell them right away, you DON’T do tap water. ( I read that each glass of water in NYC has been in and out of at least 9 different people by the time you drink it! EW!)

44&X :  It is called 44 times ten because it is on 44th street and 10th ave! Check it out their web site 

I go to this place the most. I LOVE it. It is really right on the corner of 44th and 10th, and it is all glass, so you have a cool view of Hells Kitchen while you eat. In other words, there isn’t a bad seat in the place! All of the waiters ( 99% of them are gorgeous gay men) have on t-shirts that say “Heaven” on the front, and “In HELL” on the back. I have brought many stars here to eat and their managers too. They all love it. The menu is so bizarre, you can get anything here, buttermilk fried chicken with waffles and grits, or beef filet slathered with a sweet tomatoe jam and served with mashed potatoes mixed with butter beans or grilled short ribs over polenta. ( I only eat chicken as far as meat is concerned) . The salads are creative and desserts to die for. The wine is the best here I have ever tasted and the all white HUGE dining room, they always have cool music playing and there are too many waiters, so you never have to wait for anything! The menu  has an Aisian and Southwestern mix to it, so everyone will be happy here it is AMAZING! Again, it is a bit pricey, so only go there with someone who wants to invite you to dinner (hee hee). I am getting hungry now just writting about the place! It is only open Mon-Wed 5:30pm-midnight; Thursday and Friday5:30pm to 12:30am;Sat and Sun 11:30am to 3pm then again from 5:30pm to Midnight. Enjoy!

Cafeteria: 119 Seventh ave ( in Chelsea) tel: 212 -414-1717  ( it is always packed, so you might have to call if you want a table).

This place is packed because Sex and the City has filmed there a few times and the food is good! It is not a place to go if you are a hetro female and want to pick up a hetro men. No no no. This is the gay area of Manhattan, so you won’t even have to make yourself gorgeous to go out to eat if you are a hetro gal ( which is a good thing). It is pretty loud and busy, lots of action. The menu is intersting ( the have green eggs and ham, like from the cat and the hat story, but they use pesto to make them green). Gorgeous salads and healthy foods. It doesn’t take long to eat here, the waitresses are lingering around like voltures in hopes you are finally finished and will get the hell out of there so they can seat the next paying customer, so you can’t linger here like you do in Starbucks. But it is thrilling, tasty and not that expensive.

By now you must be thinking, god, is that all you do is eat? Well, I do go out sometime to have a drink, but usually only to do karaoke. If you don’t know the name of my favorite karaoke places by now, why not? Find out what bar/club is having karaoke in NYC and the surrounding burrows buy clicking here .

 Lucky Chengs is on 1st street and 1st ave ( almost on the corner) this is the now famous karaoke/transvestite chinese restaraunt/karoake club/bar that Britney Spears went to last week and was almost beat up by a jealous girl from the audience. Britney was apparently judging the boxers or brief contest and got a bit to touchy-feely with one of the male contestants.Anyhow, Lucky Cheng is exciting and a good laugh, but the transvestite karaoke dj will sabotage your song if you are a straight, good looking woman ( hence, competition) and this is a fact. The song list is SHIT and you can’t bring your own.

There are always men dressed as women and women dressed as men, and men who used to be women and vice versa fighting over the mirror in the “ladies” room. I think it is dirty and over-rated, but what the hell, check it out.

Other clubs that are fun, that have nothing to do with karaoke are: Niagra ,CBGBS ( both in lower east villiage) which both have a punk aroma to them, and Niagra used to be one of Joey Ramones hang outs. Also, Black and White ( think it is on 10th street between 2nd and 3rd ave) extremely cool music and on Sundays they have open mic for poets and story tellers. Free entrance.

If you are an ass kissing VIP follower, try to get into Bungolow 8 which is where all the big wigs hang out and go to see and to be seen/photographed. I have been there and almost got ill from all the brown-nosing I saw.

Anyhow, I may think of more later, but have to get my broken ass down to the Chiropractor and have him crack my bones.

Lovin this weather-

“Good day sunshine!” Beatles

Love

Dr. Dot

ps. Naturally, if you are in the mood for the best massage in the world, I or one of my assistants can give you a rub down while you visit the city 😉

Normally I tell the women who call me for relationship help, that I think men are a lot like dogs(don’t chase them, give them freedom, etc.) but lately, I have been thinking about it and found that men have alot  in common with cats.

1) If you are in a room with a cat and you close the door, the cat will immediately want OUT. But if you open the door and sit back down, the cat will want to stay in the room with you and cuddle. They just want to know the door is open and they can leave if they want. (This is why marriage is a bad idea).

2)If your cat is really hungry, notice how they brown-nose and purrrr, wrap their tails around your legs while you open the can of food. They are all lovey dovey. They won’t let you out of their site! However, after you feed them, they want nothing to do with you. They find a nice warm spot and clean themselves and carry on about their furry lives. Even if you try to pet them after they ate, they act like “talk to the furry PAW!” and “as IF!” and scurry away, UNTIL they get hungry again, then it starts all over again. What to do about it? Keep them a bit hungry all the time and give them freedom, just keep really busy yourself.