Ask Dr. Dot March 2010

 Email me with your questions and I will answer back personally as soon as possible. I always change names around, so your secret is safe with me:




 I am with a new femme fatale right now and she has opened up new doors (no pun intended) of giving me pleasure through the ass.

I once thought it was the domain of gay men but I fight it most agreeable to say the least.

To stimulate my hiney she has used a variety of methods including a finger with lots of lube and a massager she applies to my taint.

Dr. Dot,  this woman claims that through my sphincter hole she can reach my g-spot. Is that true?

 Also, as a follow up do men have g-spots and are there alternative ways to reach them.

Thanks for your mastery on this hard matter Doctor.

I gotta go play with my taint.

Tainted Timmy




The man's prostate is pretty much the equivalent of the woman’s G-spot.
Easiest way to reach it is to lie on your back, legs up in the air and lots
of lube near by. If you don't mind a bit of pain, you can also be in the
doggy style position and let your partner take you from behind.
 Have your partner explore your taint and hole with her
hopefully short fingernail fingertips. Try to relax your sphincter. They
should search for a chestnut-sized lump a couple inches
inside of your entrance. Rubbing, thrusting, pounding it all stimulate
and you just have to find out what your preference is, as when done
correctly, they can make you cum like you've never cum before.





 Do you think a woman faking an Orgasm could actually be a good thing at times?
What I mean by this is by making the guy think he's doing something right, he actually
 gets into the act more, and therefore faking a O could actually produce one and
 make sex better for both parties? Does that make sense?

By leading the guy on, he wants to produce more, other than killing his ego at the
 very beginning, where the sex has no chance of being good. I've actually faked
Orgasms recently just to get it over with because it was SOOOOO boring and
I'm a guy. How fucking hard is it to make a guy happy?

Hasty Hal







No, it is never good when people fake orgasms. We all know women do it more than
men but it's completely counter productive and full of shit. Why praise someone if
they aren't doing it right? Make them WORK for it. If a person just can't cum, they
should just say "go ahead and finish; go for it, I won't cum but I still want you to".
It is ridiculous to pretend reaching climax. Telling your partner that you've "got a
spot that gets you hot, and you ain't been to it" as Frank Zappa sang, should
actually create a challenge and in turn, make sex better for both parties. Fuck the
candy coated lies. Truth rules.


Are there extra fat dildos? The ones I have, and the ones I see online and
while browsing assorted sex shops around here just don’t have enough girth for me.
 Perhaps from squeezing out one too many kids. I could never afford one of those
fancy pussy operations to that make one’s snatch tighter. Any idea where get a wide,
not long, dildo? I am not joking here. I LOVE girth.

Girthy Gail




Until “Blackzilla” (google this guy, he is Vin Diesels twin black brother?) makes a rubber replica of

his ridiculously wide cock, you could always just buy a fat cucumber, warm it up first, put condom on it and PRESTO, girth.
 (Condom keeps things hygienic and smooth). Naturally you have to keep buying them
but if you are on a low budget as you insinuate, you can peel it and eat it; feed to pets
 or put in compost bin after you’ve had your wicked way with it so you don’t feel
guilty for being wasteful.




I’ve been hanging out with a girl recently and we're sorta like friends / drinking partners.
 We haven’t had intercourse yet but every time she gives me a hand-job (three times) and
 a blowjob (twice). She covers her hands in my cum and plays with pussy for a good 5 minutes after.

She seems a genuinely nice girl but is she attempting to get pregnant or is this a ridiculous
accusation to make? please help. One major reason I haven’t whined about this to her yet is
 she is my boss and the way the economy is, I am hesitant to rock the boat.

Scared Shitless




She CAN get pregnant like this, yes. Sperm can wiggle
their way up her twat and make a dash for the egg. It's not
the easiest journey but it is possible.
This is a dangerous game she is playing. She is obviously into you but dumb,
 as she doesn't know you well enough to know if you have an STD or not or
if you have enough time/money/desire to become a father.
The fact she loves your spunk may be flattering, but ask yourself this:
 are you ready to be a father or settle down with such a risk taker?
Tell her she can/will get pregnant if she keeps wanking off with your lube and
make sure you use a condom when/if you shag her unless you're ready take
 on a lifetime commitment to a child.





I met a man last spring, we began getting intimate after a few dates that spanned
over a period of 2 months; he seemed interested, and serious about it.
After becoming intimate, he clearly showed me our relationship would only consist
in sex every other week, and that I was his booty call early in the morning – after 1 am,
after done partying with his buddies. He is 5 yrs younger (him 27, me 32).
I soon realized and stopped seeing him. He went away for the summer and we kept
in contact by messenger, on weekly basis; he wasn’t really deep, but interested on how I was doing.
This made me hope things would turn for better between us.
He came back this October, I agreed to meet him to clarify things, but we ended up having sex.
We met 3 times since his return; the 2nd time I got over my fear of finding out hurtful truth,
 and asked him what's up with us, and told all my suspicions – that he's sleeping around, etc.
He confessed he is single, he's only into sex, he does it almost everyday, he runs away from
feelings, and he’s got "no time for softness"…

And last time, after a 3 weeks break he told me after we got intimate again that I should not fall
for him, as he enjoys sex too much and has lots of partners, and as to my question “what have
 you done during weekend”, he did not answer as I “might not be too strong to take it”, as I have
a weakness for him. Hearing this, I suggested he stopped calling, we stopped meeting.
I am curious about that, as I can feel something keeps bringing us together.
He is protective, I wonder why.
I am mature enough to understand things and split, but I am single and keep convincing myself
I am doing it for sex only, since there's no one else in my life right now.
I wonder how you see things – what leads him to act this way in his life and with me, why am
I accepting such a relationship, why am I not stopping.

Hopeful Hannah





I feel that all boys start out soft, fall wholeheartedly and very deeply into their first love.
Once they get their heart broken, they usually harden up and never love that way again
unless they have a daughter. Not all, but most.
Some men love twice, but never as completely as that first delicate time. They close
off a part of their heart and from then on focus on their friends, job, self and that includes
 satisfying themselves however they choose. That's what makes men different then
women. They can be harder and think with their heads, not
with their hearts as most women do. (Not many women found in the front lines of war).
When a guy TELLS you “not to fall for him” and/or that he “likes to fuck around with
multiple partners”, he means it. You should have listened to your little voice the first time
 around when it told you to get rid of Mr. Booty Call.

Don’t let your genitals rule your life.
Sleeping with someone who is clearly using you is a sign of low self esteem unless you
 REALLY only want sex with no strings attached but
from what I gather, you wish it would turn into more. This guys is obviously enjoying his
bachelorhood and should not be taken seriously. If you do keep banging him, make sure you practice safe sex, which by the way can't protect you from the nasty viruses you can get from swapping spit with a player (Mono, Hepatitis C, etc). You may enjoy the challenge of being the ONE that ties this bad boy down and makes him change, but you can NOT change people and why bother? There are probably other men around that would be happy to give you more than the occasional shag.
If you don't love yourself, feel proud of who you are, what you do and how you treat others,
how can anyone else?
Only YOU can set the boundaries as to how you are to be treated. As far as him being “protective”, well, naturally he wants to protect his booty call.
Step outside yourself + ask, "Do I deserve this crap?" No, you don't. You can't be mad at others
for using you; it’s YOUR fault if you tolerate it. Never forget that.






I just started a relationship with my ex-wife’s best friend, well now former best friend. She was in an "on again off again" relationship with my brother-in-law. It’s been a month; I have already moved in, I watch her 5 kids while she works nights. When we have sex it is awesome, mutual orgasms, everything. Sometimes I take too long reaching climax. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy the sex, I'm just not ready for it to end yet. I know a lot of men would love to extend their lovemaking, but she is beginning to think that she is the problem. I can't
 seem to get her to understand that my ejaculation, or delay of, is not what counts. It is the sex act itself, the closeness, and human contact. As long as I am inside her, and feeling her body against mine, I don't need anything else.
I am hopelessly in love with her. But she is not ready to settle down, she has a couple of fuck buddies, she just cannot commit right now. I am more than willing to wait for her, but I don’t have the coping skills to deal with the other man and "lady friend". I don’t want to lose my mind, but I have to be with her. What do I do?

Manny the Masochist


Perhaps you can't cum because her pussy is too loose after having 5 kids and so many fuck buddies, it must feel like fucking a can of paint.
You not being about to shoot your load may also stem from your subconscious knowing she can not commit yet, so your sperm is like "why fucking bother, there is probably other sperm up there waiting to attack us anyways!” If she is  "not ready to settle down" and "has a couple fuck buddies" yet you have already moved in and started playing Mr. Mom, I need to tell you that you are WHIPPED. Grow some balls mate.
 She is walking all over you. It sounds like there aren't many females to choose from in your area if you are dating your ex wife's best friend/brother-in-laws ex. Time to look outside your area, find someone with less baggage (five kids,
 fuck buddies, uses you as babysitter),
Hello?! You claim you "have to be with her" yet you are putting up with so much bullshit, which shows you are lacking self-esteem and confidence. You can't change her, so either shut up and put up, or move out.


My wife and I recently had a discussion about women being able to “ejaculate” or “squirt” while having an orgasm.
Is this possible? If yes, how do I get this to happen?

Thirsty Tim-bo





There is research that claims every female is capable of squirting, but most of the time, her ejaculate shoots up
the urethra into the bladder, and she will just piss it out later on. Tests showed that similar hormones were found
in the woman's after-sex urine, which can also be found in male ejaculate. 
The clit, some say, is just a tiny penis (keep than in mind when trying to make your woman cum). So, if stimulated
 enough, it may just squirt, but not
all females squirt the same way. Naturally the freaky ones
end up on film, leaving people to wonder if ALL females can
squirt like a water pistol. I have personally never squirted; don’t have any female friends that own up squirting
and don't feel I am missing out on any fun. You can read more
about it here though:





 I have supreme trust issues with my partner since I found out he lied to me about going to an erotic massage parlour.
You know the kind, where they give you a release?
Anyway, he went twice; a year ago, and a few months after that, went again. So he says nothing happened and he says he
was completely embarrassed the last time he was there and would never go again. He said he went there because he was depressed;
 his father has cancer and still does. So he goes to see his father at least 5 times a week in the same town where he went to the massage parlour. It's a 20-minute drive from here. The problem is, every time he is in that town, I have anxiety and I feel as if he will be tempted to go again. If I bring it up, he screams and yells at me. Tells me I'm creating problems.
 I can't help myself and want to be there for him for his father but this is driving me insane!!!! Please help.

Losing it, Linda.




The chances of one of those happy ending whores falling in love with your partner are pretty much NIL. I am not saying it’s kosher that he goes for a full release, but you can't stop him from wanting to do so. Either leave him and move on or just ignore what he does when he leaves the house. As I have said a few times already in the past, the more fuss you make about a man's wandering eye/cock/body, the more enticing the object of his desire becomes. If THAT is the only crime in your relationship he commits, let it roll right off you. If he pisses you off in many other areas, time to walk.

Simply stop mentioning it, no matter how tempting, as it makes you look extremely jealous, insecure and turns you into the nosy nag.
 People who are busy and fulfilled in their lives don't have time to snoop and nit pick. If you really love them and don't want to move on, try some role-playing and surprise him once in a while and dress as a sexy nurse and give him a sponge bath,
massage then a very happy ending.



I am a traveling business man and am now faced with a
love triangle from hell. Thing is, I left my blackberry
out on the desk one night and my fiancé' (been dating
her for over 10 years) found it, snooped and called who
I call my "new love". I met new love a year ago and see
her when I travel. She is my dream girl and could not
be happier with her. Old love called new love and told
her who she was, about our engagement etc. and then new
love emailed me next day saying things like "I don't
even know who you are anymore! Move on, liar!" etc. I
tried to apologize and explain but she is ignoring me.
How can I get her back? I am going out of my mind. I
don't want to lose her!

Frantic Fred





Forget it Fred. New love will never forgive and forget.
I understand HOW it happened but still, women do not
put up with that crap. I am sure the old love will be
more forgiving and just dismiss it as a passing phase;
a fling, but new love will never trust you again. Either
leave old love and make your heart truly free for another
love that may cross your path, or try and patch things up
with old love and either shit or get off the pot. You
aren't doing anyone any favors by keeping them on a string.








I'm a 29-year-old woman, frustrated and disgusted because after
I go on a few dates with a man, he expects unprotected oral sex
 from me, and I am only comfortable doing this with a monogamous,
 tested partner as I know HIV and other STDs can be transmitted
 from oral. When he pressures me and I say: "I love doing that, but
I wait until I'm in a relationship" I never hear from him after wards.
Nobody I know realistically uses condoms for oral sex, so I hold off
until testing/monogamy. My question is: Is there a way to communicate
this request to a new partner in a way that doesn't turn him off?
I'm starting to despise men and don't want to, but I wonder if I have
to compromise my health and peace of
mind to get a boyfriend. Thank you for your help.

Angry Alicia




Although you can get STD's from giving oral sex, the chances
of getting HIV from oral sex are slim (unless you have a huge
open wound in our mouth and/or he has one on his cock and
blood and personal fluids get the chance to co-mingle).
A man who expects unprotected oral sex after a few dates
is probably not the type of man you are looking to be in
a relationship with anyways, so they are doing you a favor
by showing you their sloppy, impatient side. Rather than me
giving you good lines to use like "I'd love to, but I have
no clue where that thing has been", I will just suggest
using your head when it comes to dating.

Take things slower
and oral sex shouldn't even come up for a couple months if he
has a serious relationship with you in mind. So in reality,
it's no work at all, just see what he does and listen to what
he says. If he respects you and treats you like a lady, when
time goes by, you will both know each other well enough to
go get tested together. As I said before, if they are in
such a hurry just to get their cock sucked, they can just
keep walking until they find a loose woman/man/machine who
will be willing to take it all, bareback. Never forget, the best
things in life are worth waiting for (wine, oral, cheese).  


Seeing as how I love older women (I just can't relate to the
younger ones. I quickly get bored conversing with them)
every time I try to make a move on an older lady I get the
same old line (I’m too old for you) even if she's like 24 (I’m 21 now)
 what would you suggest to make the older ladies I don't know yet,
 take me more seriously?
I can't stand hitting on younger girls. Either I feel guilty or just
 plain stupid. Ever since I saw Marisa Tomei in ‘The Wrestler’ I've
 been on the jones for older bones, so to speak. Well, if you can't help me,
 no one can.

Randy Rory





First you have to put yourself in the Cougar's environment.
Avoid hanging out where really young girls gather (lame
dance clubs, house parties, or where ever else it is that
you keep meeting girls your age. Cocktail bars, bars in
general, take a cooking class, post an ad on craigslist
and be specific about liking older women and sign up on
this web site: if you find it hard
to meet an older babe in public. You could also look for
jobs as a handy man, as many older single women need help
around their house, and who knows, maybe in their bedroom
as well. Try not to talk about age. If a girl asks you
your age, say "Sweetheart, I'm old enough to drink, join the army
 and procreate", “Old enough to appreciate you”, "How old do you
think I am?" or my favorite "Old enough to hate that question".  
Don't even get into a conversation about why you prefer older women,
just go for the older women and avoid talking about age all together.
Just make it clear you enjoy being with HER and leave it at that.



Like you, I am a massage therapist. One of my clients
comes in once a month for a 90-minute rub down and he is absolutely
gorgeous. He has been coming to me for over a year now and we talk a
lot during the massage (he starts it, not me) but it would be very
unprofessional of me to flirt with him and even if he did like me, he would
probably be afraid to ask in such an environment. Our chats do get personal
and he complains about a girl he has been dating. He is fed up with her and
I want to be next in line. How would I go about wording that, or finding out
if he is interested in me or just being friendly? Waiting around for a man
to ask me out in the city may take forever. I am good looking by the way but very choosy
about whom I date. "won't you please, please help me?"

Maggie Mae


A great way to find out if a man thinks of you as just a friend or has love/sex
on his mind is to ask him if he has
any single male friends he can introduce you to. Make sure you do it in person,
not over the phone, and then you can watch his facial expressions. He will
instantly have a 'fucking miserable' look on his face if he secretly wants you
for  himself. He may snap back fast and say "um, well, let me think about it" or
just  come out and say "why would I want to give you away to anyone else when I
want you". Either way, you will find out fast.


I am sexually aroused by the smell of woman's farts, and yes I am serious. I
know I am not the only one because their are websites and porn’s made just for that.
But, I was wondering if you ever knew of anybody else who liked farts sexually?
and what are your thoughts on it?

Fart-Fan Frank

*Note: This is exactly the sort of question that makes people ask, "do you make
up some of those questions?” It is flattering that one thinks I have such a
vivid imagination and so much free time but I don't. They are real.
I am sure many women would feel comfortable around you knowing they never have
to hold back (well, except when they aren't in the mood for sex- then they may
just have to hold it in). Smell is really important for mating mammals and
if you don't like a partners smell, you know, breath, sweat, farts, overall scent,
then they are NOT the one for you but this is a rare fetish probably stemming back to
your childhood when your baby sitter would fart around you or something. Yes, I have
seen the Fart Fetish Forum but no one seems to come up with a good explanation
as to WHY they like the farts- just talk about farting, no answers. I am
sorry I am finally at a loss for words; all I can do is cut one at this point in your



I have a question is it possible for me to be affected by the spring weather like a teenage boy in heat?
Ever since this nice weather has set in I cant get a few ex-lovers off my mind I dream of the and many women I haven't met. Women on the street and in stores have caught my eye I feel as if I've hit puberty once again and I don’t remember it being this bad. I am in my second marriage and she is queen and I feel like I am disrespecting her with all this. I don’t know how to deal with this any advice for a horny schoolboy.

Horny Harold

What about that song from John Lee-Hooker “every girl I see, is lookin’ good to me”?
Don't be so hard on yourself. It is totally normal and natural. Not only are we all in a better mood when it is sunny out, but the physical side to all of this is that sunlight is absorbed through your eye's retina.
Sunlight slows down the production of melatonin in our body, which produces hormones that suppress your sex drive. (Melatonin helps us sleep but kills our sex drive). You produce more melatonin in winter and less in summer when there are longer days and hence, more sun.

This is why everyone feels hornier in sunny weather (and is why states/countries that have loads of sun are more promiscuous than in colder areas).

SO, even though you are happily married, it is not against the law to think sexy thoughts about other people and let the sun make you horny. That's the great thing about our minds, no one can tell us what to think or when to think it. Controlling your actions is a different story though. Nothing wrong with letting your imagination go wild while making love to your spouse now is there?