Ask Dr. Dot


The lowdown: I am a young attractive bisexual man living in NYC. Now, I have no problem being bisexual and I am not

one of those lurking in the corners with the same-sex side of their love/lust. I have no problems getting dates with

either gender usually. The problem is that I would like your advice on if I should disclose that when I am dating or

should I just let it go wherever the wind blows? Men usually have fewer (or no) problems with it than women.  I ask

because I was really into this one chick and I KNOW she wanted me but got cold feet;  something was holding her back

and I believe it was exactly this issue. No, I am not sexually confused and I know how I like my bread buttered, if

you know what I mean. Just some etiquette tips for the bisexual set! Thanks in advance.
Every Hole Henry

Woody Allen said, ""Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night."", so I can see the

positive side of being Bi. I have pleased a few ladies and it was fun, but I am no expert on ‘male on male’ sex

(even though my uncle is flaming gay and proud).
Every guy I have dated asks me if I have had sex with women and I always tell the truth "yes, I have, it was fun,


but I prefer cock" and it usually never comes up again. I always ask the guy if he has had sex with a man (it’s only

fair, he asked me, so I get to ask to), and so far, the answer has always been "No" (except one German guy who

admitted to receiving a blow job from a guy when he was younger). I have to admit, I looked at him differently after

that. I thought, well, this guy is very sexual, very open, but it also made me act differently around his male

friends, I was thinking in the back of my head, "which guy will suck my boyfriend off next?". I think if you are

asked, by either sex, it is best to tell the truth. I don’t think it’s anybodies business how many sexual partners

you have had, but hiding your Bi-sexuality  is not a good idea, especially if it is something you are proud of.

Hopefully you practice safe sex, which should put everyone’s mind at ease.
I personally could not date a guy who also fucks men, I just couldn’t, especially after seeing Brokeback Mountain. I

would wonder if the guy was taking either sex seriously or not (that movie also made me think "So, this is the REAL

reason men like to shag their women up the ass"). You say one woman got cold feet after she found out, or so you

think. This could be so, but you have to take that chance and stick up for your sexual preference. If they can’t

handle your truth, they won’t be able to handle you and your open minded sexuality. Gay, Straight, Bi, everyone

should be proud of their preferences and enjoy them as often as possible…


My boyfriend and I have a great relationship and AMAZING sex. We have one
problem though.
My boyfriend gets extremely rough when we kiss for a long time and I love this
but the problem is that his facial hair grows back super fast and I
get beard burn from him when we kiss.
My face gets so red and irritated. The skin gets all dry and flaky and sore. He
likes to cum in my mouth (which I LOVE) or on my face but when he does it on my
face, it makes the beard burn hurt even more.
I’ve tried washing my face with a mild exfoliant to shed the flaky skin and
using a heavy moisturizer afterward. I’ve tried wetting a towel with hot water
and then applying soap to it and gently scrubbing the area followed by heavy
moisturizer. None of these things worked.
I tried soaking the area with Neosporin and this gave me some results but my
face still looks awful.
What can I do? Please help!

All of this trouble you go through seems silly. Why not just ask him to be more gentle or
go a few days without shaving if he wants to be rough (it’s the fresh stubble that hurts like
sand paper). Ask him to use his lips when he kisses, not his whole face. If he doesn’t listen
to your suggestions, you can rub Vaseline on your face before Mr. Stubble gets a hold of you.

 < Mr. Stubble

I know it’s bad, but for the last 5 months,  I have been seeing a married father of 3.
We get along so well and
have hot, nasty sex every time we meet. Recently I told him I met another guy (I like to date others and have my
He flipped out and said he told his wife he was leaving her. He said he only wants me. Part of me is  flattered,
 but the other part knows I would get bored if he was really mine and I would cheat and hurt him.
I don’t know what to do! Please answer me as soon as possible!
Free Bird Bonnie

Married men always say they’re leaving their wives, but they seldom do, that’s why (which you just learned) it’s
not a good idea to snack on married men. You never know if they are bullshitting or not.
Write him an email or letter and tell him if he wants to keep
fucking you, he has to accept the fact that you want to remain single, you enjoy your freedom and leaving his
wife for you would be a disaster.
Tell him it turns you on that he is taken and it would kill the passion. I think
he is calling your bluff, but just in case, you have to make it VERY clear that you are free and want to stay free.
Writing this is better than saying it to his face, that way he can read it over and over again until it sinks in.
Start your letter off with "Dear Fuck Buddy". This should clear things up.