Sooooooooooooo, back in Berlin. The flight, as predicted, killed my ears and throat. Whine ,whine, whine. I know. Since I have been back, I have been going to bed at 7pm and getting up at 6 am. Can't seem to stop this insanity, but I am sure once I get better and go for a late night of karaoke, this early morning crap will be cured. I sit here for hours working online, thinking to myself, what do people do this early in the morning? I feel like I have too much time on my hands and all of my friends are still sleeping.
Simon, of American Idol/X-Factor Fame has been in touch and I will hopefully be massaging him again soon. Ditto with Joe Jackson, Harry Connick Jr. and Rod Stewart and his entourage. Finally Harry will be able to get a massage from me personally. He has been using my team for ages but has yet to meet the Doctor. He even spoke about my team on stage one night on his tour, saying how much he loves Dr. Dot's massage team. He will freak when he gets a massage from me, he ain't seen nothin' yet
The guilt of not blogging has been rather strong, sorry about that. I went to my local Ear, Nose, Throat doctor yesterday here in Berlin, just to see how things were in my throat and hear a different opinion and this Berliner bases Doctor freaked out when she looked in my throat, thus spreading panic into me. She said (all in German of course) that the Americans butchered me, that there is still lots of left over tissue he (my USA based ENT Dr. ) "forgot" and that I am bound to have many more tonsil related problems as there is still left over tonsils lurking about in my throat. GREAT!!!!!!!!!!!! Also, when I told her I was home 2 hours after the operation, she turned a nice shade of maroon with rage. She didn't believe me and when I convinced her she was still irate and slagging off the American health care routines. She told me in Germany you have to stay "AT LEAST" one week in the hospital after such an operation. Not so in the USA, where they ask you to leave as soon as you wake from the anesthesia. Buh Bye they say as they shove you out the door…. "don't call us, we will call you".
The pro's and con's between the USA and Germany have been taunting me for 18+ years now, I am a Libra and have trouble making up my mind about every thing, so this is driving me batty. "Should I stay or should I go now?" runs through my head all the time. So afraid of making the wrong choice, that I make none and continue to live two lives, spreading myself thin. Naturally there are pro's to this situation, otherwise I wouldn't keep doing it. Hard to get bored if you keep moving "I don't know but I've been told, you never slow down, you never grow old" a quote from a very underrated Tom Petty..
So before I left, as you may know, I went to see Steve Vai and had fun hanging out with him. Somehow we got to talking about Farts, as you do, and he said "Farts are like God's little joke on us". So I went online and ordered him a fart machine. I sent it express mail up to Christin, my friend and also the worlds biggest Vai fan. They are pals, Steve always makes time for her, so she is not just a fan. Anyways, they met at a local Starbucks in Boston before the show, and she gave him my fart machine.
Steve & Christin ^ – Steve opening my Fart Machine
Anyways, Jasmine returns tomorrow from Italy (she has been studying Italian in Bologna). I can't wait to give her mad hugs and kisses, yay!
So I am leaving in a few hours back to Berlin.. hate flying and I mean LOATHE entirely. I am sure with the dry air on the plane my throat will be killing me. NOT looking forward to this one bit. But, alas, Berlin is calling and I have to go.
One last pic before my flight, another shot of the popular puppies (from my friends in the UK). They are so cute I could cuddle them all day and night. Can't you just smell their puppy smell? Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah
I am pretty much all better now. YAY! I have been making up for lost (eating) time let me tell you. I am leaving Thursday to fly to Berlin so between now & then I have tons to do, lots of loose ends to tie up etc..
Last night I visited Arturo Vega, a friend I have had since I was 15. He is the Ramones creative director and has designed every official Ramones t-shirt out there. He invented that Ramones symbol:
Anyways, Arturo turns 60 this month; my fellow Libra pal will be celebrating his birthday with me in Berlin. He is coming for some art exhibition. The Ramones signed their very first record deal in his flat, the same flat "The Loft" he calls it, he lives in today (around the corner from what used to be CBGB's).
Arturo showed me the new DVD he produced called "Too tough to die". It isn't even out yet. It's all Ramones material, most of it never before seen and it included the unveiling ceremony for the Johnny Ramone statue. Artie is quite the salesman, I ended up buying lots of Ramones t-shirts etc. I get them half price but $80 is $80. I have more Ramones shirts than I know what to do with lol.
I have to get my ass into bed, my final Doctor visit is tomorrow (he will look at what used to be my tonsils one last time). It helped me a lot to vent here in my blog; without that I would have been not only in pain, but very frustrated. I love to write, it feels great.
That reminds me, I have to publish another Ask Dr. Dot blog, it's been a while.. busy busy busy..
Finally, a street named after Frank Zappa. I asked myself, “why, why Marzahn?” In case you didn’t know, Marzahn is on outskirts of Berlin and well, I would normally never go there. Sort of far from my house. I found out though, why Frank Zappa street was born in Marzahn.
The Orwo Haus is the reason. The Orwo Haus is the biggest recording studio in Europe and (some are sure) the whole world. 150 bands at a time can (and do) rehearse there daily. From the out side, it doesn’t look like much, no one would imagine what is going on inside. Well, you can read more about it HERE if you want.
< Harry
Napoleon (Napi) steals the show wherever he is. You gotta love Napi.
Around 3,000 people came from all over the place, on July 28th ( I know, this blog is long over due) to celebrate the unveiling of Frank Zappa street. Many bands played and headlining was Germany’s best Frank Zappa tribute band “Sheik Yerbouti” . Napoleon Murphy Brock joined them as their special guest. Nappi gets around 🙂
You can see many more pics from that event if you click HERE
I was asked to join them for their Encore, a hot version of “I am the slime”. I was freezing my tits off. When I left my flat, it was steaming hot, so I wore open toed shoes, a skirt and t-shirt and even after 18 years living in Berlin, you would think I would KNOW by now you have to literally drag a bag of clothes around with you as you never know how the weather will be/change.
I was literally shaking from being so cold that by the time I was asked to come on stage and read a letter from From Frank Zappa’s brother, Bobby to the crowd, my lips were purple. But, like a trooper, nothing keeps me from spreading the love and music of Frank Zappa. Nothing.
My good friend Tina (Debutante Daisy) and I. She knows the words to ALL Zappa songs
Tina Growhowski
^ Robyn & Dot
Another HUGE Frank Zappa fan ^
She flew all the way from the USA along with a tour run by a man named Scott.
They all came together for the street naming and the Zappanale.
Like I was saying, NOTHING prevents me from preaching Zappa music. In Germany I am often invited onto talk shows and written about, as they find my career fascinating (so do I ). And every single interview I have ever done, since 1997, I have mentioned Frank Zappa. He crowned me “Dr. Dot” long ago, so that is usually how his name is mentioned “How did you come up with that name?” they ask. Then I tell them about Frank, how my Dad is a massive Zappa fan and how much his music means to me. His music is the BEST (well, I am also insanely into the Beatles, so it’s a tie).
This is my new Zappa shirt ^ My pal Mark drew it and made it for me.
That man ^ in the above picture with me, is Thomas, the President of the Arf Society. What is the Arf Society you ask?
“Founded on the 20 March 1993, the Arf-Society is a
Frank Zappa fan club based in Northern Germany
with an international membership.”
It’s best you just click HERE to read all about them.
Wolfhard K. actually founded the Arf Society but Thomas is the pres. since a few years (Wolfhard is a busy man). Wolfhard and Thomas are extreme Zappa fans and have been putting on the annual Frank Zappa music fest which they call the Zappanale. This year was the 18th annual Zappanale and they invited me to help out a bit and to join Project Object on stage for some fun. So I accepted and I will try to find the words to explain how happy I am that I went.
What’s missing from this picture? Sadly it’s Ike WILLIS, that’s what. Where was Ike? His name was on the posters, the tickets, the press releases. A driver was sent to pick him up in Berlin, all the way from Bad Doberan, which is a 3 hour drive. He did not get off the plane as planned. In fact, he never even bothered to get in touch to tell them he missed his plane.
Why would Ike miss his plane? Because he is having an unfortunate struggle with cocaine addiction. I am not leaking any private information here. Everyone who is hip to the scene knows this. In fact, just about everyone who has met Ike in the last few years, has lent him $50. Ike owes EVERYONE $50. It’s rather ironic that Ike, who was Frank’s right hand man for YEARS and his best friend, ends up a crack addict. Frank was shrewdly against drugs (well, cigarettes are indeed a drug too, but anyways..).
In my opinion, drugs suck. I have never tried cocaine and can’t stand being around people who take it or even talk about it. BUT I can imagine why Ike does this drug. Not making excuses for him, but imagine your best friend dying, how horrible that must be and then on top of it, having to sing his songs almost daily to a crowd of his fans. Frank’s shoes are impossible to fill, and being on the front line, almost daily (well, nightly) singing the lyrics your best mate wrote must do your head in. It must be hell. Hell in paradise.
Making a living doing something you love is paradise, but in such a circumstance, it can be difficult. If you are sensitive (most artist are overly sensitive) then falling into such a trap, is understandable. Not good by all means, but I can see why it happens.
Fame, drugs, money, (“or was it the music?” ). I just hope Ike gets help and fast. He could end up dying, like other artists have done, thanks to that pesky, overwhelming, addiction People should plan a huge intervention and toss him into Rehab. SO MANY famous artist are having trouble now a days. Amy Winehouse is throwing her fucking career in the toilet too, just like Ike is. It’s so sad.
But anyways, with or without Ike, the Zappanale party went on.
The first night ( Thursday) everyone meets and greets in preparation for the Zappanale party following the next day.
I LOVE that sweatshirt I have on. I got it in 1988 in Boston. It’s held up pretty well. It says “Broadway the Hard way” on the sleeve.
So this was night 1. I was a tad tired, but knew I could handle the up coming 3 nights of partying. It was so fun to meet some of the Zappa-teers (huge Zappa fan organization) and see Nappi, Andre’ and the guys again..
Andre’, guitarist/vocalist and founder of Project Object with his sweet heart, Cheri. ^ (his OTHER sweetheart Robyn, pictured way up in this blog) put Andre in the hot seat. Juggling two ladies at the same time. Typical musician 🙂
Andre’ preaches Frank big time. He doesn’t earn jack shit touring with his band, he does it for the love of Frank’s music.
This is the list of all the bands that played at the Zappanale ^
My hotel ^ it is really strange. There is no one at the desk all night, you could have a massive party in the living room they have off to the side of the lobby and you could drag that party into your fucking hotel room and no one would care; completely the opposite of the uptight rules they have in Dublin where you can’t even have someone come up to your room to help you with your bags. You have to give it to the Germans, they are tolerant when it comes to fun.
The Park across from my hotel. I heard this is where the first ever Zappanale took place. But it got too big for it’s britches and moved to a huge field..
The town of Bad Doberan is clean, quaint, gorgeous and very tolerant of the annual Zappa festival.
< Dressed for my “Mary” skit
I finally got to meet my pen pal. Andrew ^ and I have been corresponding online for years. He runs a UK Zappa news/fan web site called “Idiot Bastard Son”. He has intervied many of Zappa’s alumni and I did one for him too a while ago. He was as funny in person as he is online. But then again, most Zappa fans are intelligent, special and funny, just like Frank’s music.
< Bass extraordinaire
Project Object were one guitarist and vocalist short ( Ike) but you would have never known it! They were fantastic!
Don Preston , the man in the purple velvet jacket on key boards, was one of the high lights of the whole Zappanale. He plays with Project Object on tour most of the time, but is busy with many solo projects. I am sure he is over 70 as he is one of the original members of the Mothers of Invention.
Project Object doing their thing ^
One of the few females at the festival was serving beer. I brought that plastic urinal with me, thinking they may not have anything to throw water on me when I play Mary. I got this urinal in a bar in Berlin called Cafe’ Klo (Klo is a nick name for Toilet in German). Everyone drinks out of these urinals in that bar and you can buy them as well. I don’t drink beer, but they do hold a lot of beer, so I made good use of it and kept my pals well watered with all of those unwanted beer tickets I was given..
This is Andrew’s pal Ian ^ Andrew wore this ^ shirt, thinking Ike would be there.
Andre’ is a master on guitar ^
This is not the first time I have played “Mary” on stage with Project Object. I like participating anyway I can. I asked them to learn “Valley Girl” so I can sing that with them next time our paths cross.
Here are the lyrics to the song “Fembot in a Wet T-shirt” in case you are one of those people who don’t know the album Joe’s Garage by Frank Zappa..
Act I
SCENE FIVE
THE WET T-SHIRT CONTEST
After a few weeks on the bus, being porked by
Toad-O’s road crew, and being too exhausted to do
their laundry on a regular basis, MARY is dumped in Miami.
With no money (and no other famous rock groups due into
the area for at least three weeks), she tries to pick up a few bucks
by entering the Wet T-Shirt contest at The Brasserie…
IKE:
Looks to me like something funny
Is going on around here
People laughin’ ‘n’ dancin’ ‘n’ payin’
Entirely too much for their beer
And they all think they are
Clean outa-site
And they’re ready to party
“Cause the sign outside says it’s WET T-SHIRT NITE
‘N’ they all crave some Hot delight
Well the girls are excited
Because in a minute
They’re gonna get wet
‘N’ the boys are delighted
Because all the titties
Will get ’em upset
‘N’ they all think they are Reety-awright
‘N’ they’re ready to boogie
‘Cause the sign outside says it’s WET T-SHIRT NITE
‘N’ they all crave some Pink delight
When the water gets on’em
Their ninnies get rigid
‘N’ look pretty bold
It’s a common reaction
That makes an attraction
Whenever it’s cold
‘N’all of the fellas
They wish they could bite
On the cute little nuggets
The local girls are showin’ off tonite
You know I think it serves ’em right
You know I think it serves ’em right
You know I think it serves ’em right
You know I think it serves ’em right
And it’s WET T-SHIRT TIME AGAIN
I know you want someone to show you some tit!
BIG ONES! WET ONES! BIG WET ONES!
At this point, FATHER RILEY (who had been recently de-frocked
for not meeting his quota, and has grown his hair out and
bought a groovy sport coot and moved to Miami and changed
his name to BUDDY JONES) steps onto the crowded bandstand
in his exciting new role as a WET T-SHIRT CONTEST EMCEE…
BUDDY JONES:
Ah, thanks, IKE…
Yes, it’s WET T-SHIRT TIME AGAIN
Here at The Brasserie… Home of THE TITS… huh huh…
And it’s the charming Mary from Canoga Park
Up next in her bid for the semi-finals…
Hi,Mary…howya doin?
Having been fucked senseless by the boys in the crew, MARY does
not recognize the former religious personage from her nights in the
rectory basement during which she acquired her basic manual skills…
confounded by his sport coat, she replies…
MARY: Hi!
Realizing that she no longer recognizes him… or even appreciates
the patient religious training he had given her in the past, BUDDY JONES,
like a true WET T-SHIRT EMCEE type person, proceeds to say various
stupid things to waste time, making the contest itself take longer, thereby
giving the mongoloids squatting on the dance floor an opportunity to buy
more exciting beverages. . . liquid products that will expand their
consciousnesses to the point whereby they might more fully enjoy the ambiance
of Miami By Night…
BUDDY JONES:
Where ya from?
MARY:
Ah, the bus…
BUDDY JONES:
Which one?
MARY:
You know…the last tour…
You know…
Leather
BUDDY JONES:
Oh.. .you were the girl that was stuck to seat 38 on Phydeaux III…
why don’t you get in position now and take a deep breath, because
this water is very, very cold, but it’s goin’ to be so stimulating. And
Mary’s the kind of Red-Blooded American Girl who’ll do anything…
MARY:
Anything…
BUDDY JONES:
I said anything… for fifty bucks
That’s right!
MARY:
I really need the fifty bucks you know I gotta get home!
BUDDY JONES:
Yeh, I know, your father is waiting for you in the tool shed… that’s right,you
heard right… our big prize tonite is fifty American Dollars to the girl with
the most exciting mammalian protruberances…
MARY: Here I am!
BUDDY JONES: …
as viewed through a thoroughly soaked, stupid looking white sort of male
person’s conservative kind of middle-of-the-road COTTON UNDER-GARMENT!
Whoopee! And here comes THE WATER!
MARY:
EEEK!
BUDDY JONES:
No, you’d squeak more if the water got on you …sounds like you just got an
ice pick in the forehead… AND HERE COMES THE ICE PICK IN THE FOREHEAD…
a million laughs, Mary! Anyway; good golly, what a mess…she’s totally soaked..
totally committed to the fifty bucks.. .That’s it just step into the spotlight.. let the guys
get a good look at ya honey!
MARY:
Here I am!
BUDDY JONES:
Whaddya say, fellas?
Nice setta jugs?
Now Mary, how’s about shakin’ it around a little…
BUDDY JONES:
Oh my goodness, look at her go!
MARY:
Oooh! I’m dancing!
I’m dancing!
BUDDY JONES:
Ain’t this what living is really all about!
Here’s your fifty bucks, Mary…
MARY:
Oh great! Now I can go home!
BUDDY JONES:
Home is where the heart is.
MARY: “On the bus!”
That water was fucking freezing, so the look of shock/horror is authentic. heh heh.
“ Oh great! Now I can go home!”
“with leather?”
The headliners of the whole Zappanale ^.
I haven’t seen Chad since 1988!! He is so shy, so soft spoken. SO SWEET!!! His whole band is sweet in fact. I loved hanging out with these guys. They played an all instrumental set. No Zappa tunes at all, although at certain points you could hear a tad of a Zappa riff, like they were teasing us. They were brilliant. I suppose everyone was expecting them to whip out at least one Zappa tune, but they didn’t.
Perhaps Chat wants to stay on Dweezil and Gail’s good side. At least now they can’t bitch at them for playing any Zappa music!
Oooh they sounded like butter. Lovely! x
^ you can see from his smile how sweet and genuine he is
Eric Slick ^ plays drums with Project Object. He is a genius (started playing drums at age 2 🙂
His Mom, Robin Slick, is a famous writer. Check out her blog HERE
The English band, Monty and the Butchers ^ were soooooo fun to hang out with. A million laughs indeed.
Jorg, the film director, who happens to be holding the mic, films each Zappanale. They make a dvd of each Zappanale. They interviewed me for the dvd. I was lively as usual.
I was lacking sleep, which I really really need right now, as I am literally running on fumes. My tonsils are beyond infected and I was told a year ago they have to be removed but I never find the time, so I have been living on antibiotics and feeling like shit for about two years. I know, it’s stupid. A vicious cycle, but I just never find the time. So if I get less than like 7 hours of sleep, I feel dizzy, sore throat, all that wimpy shit. I was devastated when I was told I had to be up and ready for an interview on stage Saturday at noon. I know this sounds like a diva talking but it’s not. I am just a night person and seldom fall asleep before 7am. Hard habit to break at such short notice 🙂
Jim Cohen, who has been the host for a few years at the Zappanale, was to interview me Saturday at noon. He does a representation each year on the Saturday of the Zappanale (the Zappanale always takes place in the first week of every August fyi) . He interviews guests and talks in great detail about Frank Zappa. He is a walking encyclopedia of Frank Zappa trivia/facts/info.
I was there, on time, and went through with the interview. I did most of it in German as it takes place in Germany, but said somethings in English too for the English speaking audience. What I am getting at, is this weekend is a marathon. You won’t be resting, you will be ON the whole time, partying, talking, laughing, dancing and by the end of the weekend, you won’t have a voice anymore. I swear I am still hoarse from the festival and it was a few weeks ago. Found that out the hard way last night at karaoke.
Eric Svalgård ^
The other Eric of Project Object and I signing the symbol for the Arf Society.
Monty and the Butchers hamin’ it up during the grand finale’ ^
The crowd (above) and the sound men ( are nice guys, but have to work while everyone else is raising hell, hence the glum faces)
Chad and Andre’ ^
Don and I discussing his amazing threads his wife sews for him. What a sweet heart! ^
Christian ^ was my driver for the whole festival. His Father Wolfhard is the founder of the whole Zappanale. The Arf Society was obviously trying extra hard to please me 🙂
Musician soup ^ …………. backstage at the Zappanale was heaven on earth
Hasi ^ a Zappateers member, from Austria and I in the Zappateer tent. This tent is out in the camping area at the Zappanale festival. Everyone in the camping area pretty much parties straight through, with no sleep, from Thursday to Monday morning. It is a non-stop Zappa themed party. The Zappateers tent is the center of it all. I was welcomed with open arms and even knew a few of the people hanging out in the tent.. It was super fun, but I had to hang backstage most of the time, as they had tiny tasks for me to do.
What are the Zappateers? ” The Zappateers are dedicated collectors of Zappa live shows.”
It’s best to click HERE to read more about the Zappateers..
These two lovely gals ^ know every word to every Zappa song and I love them. They were a fixture in the Zappateers tent and later on stage for the Grand finale too. They are seriously dedicated Zappa fans.
Sunday when I woke up, I thought: I am too tired to go to the Zappanale grounds again. I thought I would just sleep all day and hide until my ride took me back to Berlin. WRONG ANSWER. Thomas, the president of the Arf Society called and said “where are you hiding!?? We need you on stage at 9pm!” Eh? I thought my work was done. Guess not. So I dragged my ass out of bed, well, off the floor as I always sleep on the floor in hotels, as I am a walking sleeping disorder.
Painted my face a bit and tried to get motivated for yet another night of partying. I am only used to going out like once a week, sometimes once a month. Contrary to popular belief, I don’t go out much at all. I am a hermit. It looks like I go out a lot because I blog about it every time I go out. I can only handle two drinks and hate smoking so I am a light weight and need a day to recover when I party (I have always been that way, so don’t laugh to yourself as you say “it’s called getting old” under your breath). I have always been a light weight. sigh. ANYHOW, where the hell was I?
Oh yes, my lovely driver came and basically had to pry me out of my room as I was really dragging my ass by Sunday. But like magic, once I set foot on the Zappanale grounds, I woke up like a freshly watered flower.
So, I was wondering, what was my chore of the day? Why was I needed on stage at 9pm? Another Wet T-shirt thingy? A massage for Chad? Was I entered into the Zappa trivia game without my knowledge?
Napi and Um, I know he works for the Zappanale, I think he is the director of transportation but don’t quote me on that, but at any rate, that is Napi posing with a man I think may be Hendrik. (Lets play “name that German!”)
Chad & Andre’ ^
Kurz, Italian Frank Zappa fan and musician (he let me draw that stache on his face 🙂
I was attacked by a sharpie pen ^
Naturally after 3 nights of camping, the Zappanale guests, artist, campers and workers started to smell a bit. I mean, it is hot, humid, dusty.. everyone is sweating and drinking.. you get the picture. I had a close wiff of Matthews (bassist/vocalist/founder of Monty and the Butchers) underarm. Me likey. I LOVE the smell of a man’s sweat. Fuck deo and perfume and show gels. I want to smell the MAN, not the fucking brand. Nothing I hate more than a man wearing perfume, cologne, aftershave, deo etc. I want to smell the truth baby!
Well, it’s only fair… ^
Sunday night, we were ALL TOAST. I couldn’t believe that Monty and the Butchers hadn’t seen the Zappa statue of Bad Doberan yet!
The drivers brought us there and we had a little photo shoot. The one with the glasses (passed out) is Joe. he plays horns some times for Project Object. What a laugh that night was!
Me posing with the Zappa statue. There was a LOT of controversy surrounding the statue. Gail Zappa didn’t approve it and is still not happy about it. The Arf Society had to fight tooth and nail to convince the town of bad Doberan to even allow the statue to be erected there. All the drama!! It’s so sad how everyone behaves after an icon dies (James Brown, Zappa, Elvis, John Lennon, etc).I hope to fuck the dead idols are looking down, watching the behavior, keeping tabs….
I want to close this now and mention once more, how AMAZING the Zappanale was. I will be there for sure next year. This festival has been going on 18 years, and I hope it keeps going on for many more years. It has a special vibe to it, so much love for Frank, so many cool people, so much fun!!!!!!!!!!! The area is amazing too, it’s magical, in fact I couldn’t think of a better place to have such a wonderful meeting of minds. Thank you Arf Society for the lovely time, I will never forget it.
x
ps. If you haven’t seen them yet, I made 3 videos (well, one long one, broken up into 3 bits) of my Zappanale experience.
Just a preview of one of the upcoming massive blogs. I was at the unveiling of the one and only Frank Zappa street tonight (well, last night in Berlin). Sheil Yerbouti, a Zappa tribute band headlined and the very famous and talented Zappa alumni, Napi (above ^) joined the band. He plays with many Zappa tribute bands and he always steals the show 😉
I read an open letter from Bobby Zappa to the fans which gave his blessings for the Zappa street ceremony. I also joined Sheik Yerbouti and sang “I am the slime” with them. Much fun. I will finish this blog in a few days, I still have to do my Dublin blog. I have loads of pics to crop and upload and all that writing too.. and I have to get ready and pack for the upcoming, 18th annual Frank Zappa fest called Zappanale. Battling a lung infection again, wondering if Steve Vai passed that flu onto me accidentally in Dublin, if so, I would have to say I have the Steve Vai-rus. heh heh.
When I showed up backstage with my massage table, I noticed another female massage therapist was already there. I thought "oh jeeze, there's gonna be a cat fight here" but no, it went over well. The record company got it wrong and instead of ordering a chiropractor like the manager needed, they ordered another massage therapist. The lady was called Becky and she is English, living in Berlin. She said "you know me already Dot, I applied to work for you about 6 months ago". Aaah, yes, indeed. Guess we never found the time for the imperative audition. She and I had more than enough bodies to rub down between us. The crew, management, and two bands (and some caterers) all needed massages, so I was happy she was there.
The Coral and the Arctic Monkeys played football (ok, for the Americans "Soccer" ) before the show. Lots of talented, English Testosterone in the air. Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.
I head from several people that just a couple years ago, the Arctic Monkeys used to open up for the Coral. Times have changed indeed. I have faith, though, that the Coral will bounce back and headline like they should all over the states. Apparently they have new management and they will do a better job promoting the talented Brits. They are from just outside of Liverpool… super cute accents. Like butter.
I was working hard but I was in heaven the WHOLE time.
^ Didn't realize the drummer and singer were brothers when I first met them…
I'm sure girls go mental over this guy ^
The members of the Arctic Monkeys are rather quiet and a tad shy. As the night wore on, they did come out of their shells a bit more. They are Sooooooooooooooooo young.
The Coral has a unique sound, very melodic, kind of a 60's sound, hard to describe. They appeared on the Conan O'Brien show not too long ago, so they are no strangers to the states. I am routing for them.
''
Steve Skelly, the singer of the Coral brought me up on stage to watch the Arctic Monkeys set. The Monkeys watch the Coral and vice versa, they support each other and get along great.
It was kind of embarrassing for me to be on the stage as it was very light and there were no speakers to hide behind, so the crowd could all see us. I had my massage oil bottle around my waist and my massage shirt on… no way to hide all that. I was surprised how many people were on the stage during their set actually. I guess the younger the band, the more people are on stage. I mean, at the beginning of the Stones career, you can see old videos of them playing live and there were LOADS of people on the stage.. managers, techs, fans, groupies, etc. NOW, only the BAND and the techs on the side are allowed up. I am sure in a few years that will happen with them as well. I mean, a certain person who works for that band, not mentioning any names, was walking around, not really making an effort to hide much, stretching and leaning against an amp, etc. HELLO!? I find that all very amusing.
It's like men trying to get their recognition. They are paid to work behind the scenes but secretly long for a bit of that spotlight. It's cute. It's far from the first time I've seen it and I am 1000% sure it won't be the last.
It's rare that two bands who tour together get on so well, so it was refreshing to see and a great vibe backstage.
Some of the British (and Irish) guys that I know here in Berlin called me asking me for free tickets to this concert. I said "are you sure you want to go? There will be thousands of young, hysterical girls screaming all night" and they said "exactly, that's why we want to go!". Couldn't get them in anyways, as it was really sold out and well, ass, gas or grass, no one rides for free.
Like I said in the youtube video, Nick is one of the most beautiful people I have ever met. Not just one the outside silly, I mean, he is a wonderful person. It was difficult for me to behave. sigh.
Thee guys are LOADS of fun. The music they had blasting out of their dressing room was mostly oldies, stuff like Johnny Cash, the Ronettes, the Proclaimers and lots of other stuff that I can't remember now, sadly 🙁
It all sounded GREAT though. The perfect soundtrack to the perfect evening.
^ Ok, let me explain so you don't get the wrong idea. Steve Skelly wrote "Thanks for the "LOBE JOB" because I massaged his face and ears and paid special attention to his stressed out ear lobes, like I do. He coined that phrase right there and then. Steve could very well be a stand up comic, he is fucking hysterical. My face hurt when I went home from laughing so much. LOVE THESE LADS!
When they first met me and found out I was American, and saw on my flyer that I had massaged the Undertaker, they went mad. What is up with the Brits loving American Wrestling so much? Lol. It's so strange, they LOVE it. The wanted to know ALL about the Undertaker. cute.
Steve LOVES the Ronettes and Aretha Franklin. I was also pleasantly surprised when I went to their myspace page for the first time and saw "Frank Zappa" listed up rather high on their list of influences. yay!
Lee plays a fucking mean guitar. He has a very distinctive sound, one which I heard a few times when the Arctic Monkeys played, not during their wild punk riffs, but sometimes when they slowed down, I heard Lee's influence on them. I have to assume the Coral influenced them a bit, being that they are almost 10 years older than the Monkeys and that the Monkeys opened for THEM not too long ago. Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.. sweet 🙂
John ^…. another cutie pie. Wtf? Is it raining hotties in the UK or what?
After his massage (not this one, but the proper one on the massage table in the other room) Ian said "That was the BEST massage I've ever had Dot!". Now those are the words I love to hear. He wasn't joking when he said he gives a great foot massage. He gave my foot a quick squeeze and I thought I'd died and went to heaven.
The Coral on tour:
Jul 28 2007 Lancashire Cricket Ground Manchester Jul 29 2007 Lancashire Cricket Ground Manchester Aug 18 2007 V Festival Chelmsford Aug 19 2007 V Festival Staffordshire
June 27th ( I know, it's been a while already) Sonic Youth played Berlin. I had never seen them live before, but I already knew the drummer, Steve from Hoboken. He is co-owner of Maxwells, a club compared to CBGB's. Steve comes to me for massage as well, so I was excited to finally see him in action. I also didn't know that Kim and Thurston are together and have a lovely daughter. So love can exist in a band (well, Pat Bennetar proved it too).
Kim enjoyed a massage before the show. What a sweet heart. Lovely feet 🙂
The lady can sing, dance and play a mean guitar. A rock and roll mom if I ever met one. Well, I suppose Sonic Youth would be classified as Punk, but on their MYSPACE PAGE they have "Rock/Experimental/Indie" listed as their genre'.
Lee had his son backstage, and Kim and Thurston had their daughter there too. It's really a laid back, family atmosphere backstage with them. They have been around for ages and their fans are shrewdly loyal. The show was beyond sold out. PACKED to the brim.
These lovely young folks, not mentioning their names as they are shy, enjoyed meeting Steve and said the show was "fucking intense".
My mate Steve took very good care of me, what a man! ^
I think Thurston is about 6 feet 8 inches tall. I think he looks a tad like a young Phil Lesh and could have been a NBA star at that height.
The manger helped me fill in some of the songs there as you can see but to be honest, I don't know their music well (yet). I do know the concert was extremely energetic and unique. The crowd REFUSED to let them stop after one encore. The roadies already broke down the mic stands and mic's etc, and the house lights were on for over 20 minutes and the crowd would NOT stop cheering "Zugabe. ZUGABE!" which means "Encore". Maybe if they fucking screamed in English the Bands that play here in Berlin that are English native speakers would understand them and come out quicker. heh heh. No, I'm just playing, it is sweet they wouldn't let them stop, so the band finally gave in and came out and did one last HOT number. The crowd tried again, but finally had to leave. I hope the band knows how much they are loved.
I love how Thurston circled himself in the autograph. As if one would over look the gentle giant. I am pretty sure that shot was taken in Hoboken. I can see the city in the background and they do have a studio in Hoboken and Steve, the drummer, lives there.
Jul 13 2007 Pitchfork Music Festival Chicago, Illinois Jul 19 2007 Berkeley Community Theatre Berkeley, California Jul 20 2007 Greek Theatre w/ Redd Kross Los Angeles, California Jul 21 2007 KXLU Benefit at Urban Outfitters Santa Monica, California Jul 28 2007 McCarren Park Pool w/ the slits Brooklyn, New York Aug 15 2007 Paredes de Coura Festival Paredes de Coura Aug 17 2007 la route du rock festival Saint-Malo , Brittany Aug 18 2007 Pukkelpop Hasselt Aug 19 2007 Lowlands Festival Biddinghuizen Aug 21 2007 ABC1 – second date added Glasgow, Scotland Aug 22 2007 ABC1 Glasgow, Scotland Aug 25 2007 Archa Theatre Prague Aug 26 2007 Openair at Arena Vienna Aug 27 2007 INmusic Festival / Jarun summer stage Zagreb Aug 29 2007 La Vilette Jazz Festival Paris Aug 30 2007 Roundhouse – Sold Out London Aug 31 2007 Roundhouse – Sold Out London Sep 1 2007 Roundhouse – Sold Out London Sep 2 2007 Electric Picnic Port Laoise, Laois Oct 5 2007 Stubbs BBQ Austin, Texas Oct 6 2007 Thunderbird Hotel Marfa, Texas Oct 7 2007 House of Blues Dallas, Texas
Their tour dates ^
If you love wild shows, go see Sonic Youth. They are on fire.
from a place where no one celebrates it (I'm in Berlin again, but not for much longer).
Jasmine is finally out of school (amazing report card) and has the whole world to explore. Of course I am happy for her, but naturally worried too. How does one let go? I admire people who can, as I am finding it, well, impossible. I will, but still, it's difficult. Even leaving Berlin now will be difficult, as for me it will be somehow leaving her. I have lived two lives (USA/GERMANY) for so long now, I don't think I can change. I love both places- well, I love Europe and how one can hop a plane for $50 and fly to the UK, Italy, or France.
Trying to envision myself settling down and living a normal life, one life, in one house/flat with one person, forever. This freaks me out. I feel push coming to shove here, like I have to decide something big, something SOON and I am not liking it at all. Well, we all do shit we don't like I suppose but being a Libra woman, I try to avoid making big decisions, I can never make up my mind about anything.
I can't even sleep anymore as the decision making side of my brain is wide awake, tapping it's foot, waiting impatiently for some answer that I can not give. All I know for sure is I love the people that I love, whole heartedly, I love my work and I LOVE music…that's pretty much all I can say is 100% certain.
"On July 4, 1776, we claimed our independence from Britain and Democracy was born"
Hmmmmm, we broke away from the British empire. That's what all the cole slaw, cook outs and fireworks are about? What a great reason to fucking party. I tried to watch "The wind that shakes the barley" last night and have to confess I only downloaded it cause Cillian Murphy stars in it. But watching British soldiers beat the fuck out of (and kill) unarmed Irish natives as they tried to take over the whole of Ireland made me so sick I had to turn it off half way through. Reminded me of watching Braveheart, how the English killed so many of the Scots, and countless other films that show the English killing/beating the Irish, French, Scottish and well, trying to take over all of America too, well, it just makes me sad and it makes me want to move to Ireland for some reason. War is stupid. Some countries, however, have started more than others. Some breed aggression. The English over here in Berlin are no exception. They start fights every where they go (out in Berlin). There are signs on some bars that say "No Brits!".
I got a taste of that on Saturday night when I hosted a karaoke show. I saw loads of Brits that were in the bar start fights for no reason. Idiots. One even roughed me up. Big bad men. Whatever. Have a fucking scone and relax. They should leave their boxing attitude back home in the UK. But then again, they fit in quiet nicely amongst the German men who throw their fists around as well. The guy who knocked me out here in January while out jogging got off the hook without ANY trouble. He didn't even get arrested. You can actually punch someone out here and not get into any trouble. Some love the liberal ways of Germany, but sometimes it can make you feel unprotected.
I mean sex offenders/pedophiles get off too easy here; they don't stay in jail for long at all, and most get out after a couple years even after murder. Double edged sword here. You feel free, as in, when you are out driving, there are no cops on your fucking ass. You can drink in public, drink basically at any age, smoke grass out in public, piss outside, sunbathe in the nude without any scoffs or trouble, but when it comes to having the law come down on someone who hurt you or your belongings, forget it. They have better things to do, like throw people in jail for forgetting to pay their taxes on time. Murder, rape and violence is frowned upon. Avoiding your taxes will get you 10 years or more in jail. The Government has their priorities. You just sit back and hope karma will take care of things.
Before I go, I want to know was I the only one who realized how fucking stupid Larry King was asking Olivia, George Harrison's widow, what she thought of the song "Something" ? That song was written about George's ex, Patti Boyd. You can see the interview on Youtube. I just thing Larry was all over the place. That would be like asking Julian Lennon how he likes the song "Beautiful Boy" when it was clearly written about Sean. Guess Larry isn't much of a Beatles fan..DOH!
Tonight was a busy night. I just wanted to chill but I helped Jasmine get ready for her prom -she wore a cute hippie looking wine colored dress that hung above the knees and she rejected the sueded flip flops I bought her, instead, she wanted to go barefoot. Her dread locks were tied up and some of her hair stayed down, you know, half up, half down, like Angelina Jolie always wears hers. I guess this hippie attitude comes from me seeing the Grateful Dead about 50 times while I was pregnant with her.
I am happy she is a rock chick; I'm not complaining, I just wish she would have worn shoes and maybe let me buy her a dress. The other kids and parents must think "That Dr. Dot must spend all her money on rock and roll t-shirts and globe trotting as Jasmine wears all these hippie rags and converse high tops that have more holes in them then the streets of Blackburn!" But that's not true. Jasmine is not a consumer. She loathes getting presents and being given money etc. Very practical and frugal. Like me. I do love me a new lap top and my iPod though 🙂
ANYWAYS, after that hectic whirlwind, I went home and massaged Joe Jackson (who lives in Berlin now, and is recording his new album) from 11pm until 1am when my phone rang. Kanye West was in Berlin (on a promo tour) and wanted a massage. I could have sent one of my assistants, but I was curious to meet this man that Perez Hilton and the press always talk about. They usually mention this "He stormed out of an award ceremony, angry, because his video didn't win the Video of the Year award!".
They scathe him and I wanted to see if he was really like they described. In fact, I have never even heard his music, the only reason I knew of him was because of this nasty rumor. That and I know he did a song with Jamie Foxx, who I LOVE since seeing (and buying) the film RAY.
I was expecting a WHOLE lotta attitude. I got NONE. I was lead to his room and was kept waiting for a few minutes, along with his assistant. He opened the door and I yapped "Avon Calling!". heh heh. His room smelt like he had been burning a stack of rubber tires! He was holding what was left of some plug adapter, which was now half black from the flames and melted. LMFAO!!!!!!!!
Apparently the hotel gave him a plug adapter and what he needed was an electricity converter, like a mini transformer or so. It was their fault, not his. Thank God it didn't fry his lap top! Anyways, we got that sorted, I told the front desk in German to sort it out. I massaged him for about 2 hours and the music he chose to play from his lap top was mostly Maroon 5, then later, Modest Mouse. He said he is friends with Adam, the singer of Maroon 5 (I told him he was a client of mine too) and that they did a song together. I never head much Maroon 5 up until tonight. I only knew the two popular tunes "She will be loved" and "This love has taken it's toll", you know those catchy tunes..
Anyways, then we heard Modest Mouse, who he said is one of his favorites. I told him how I met Modest Mouse one night at one of my karaoke hang outs in NYC: Cassidys Pub, W 55th street. They have karaoke every Friday night (no they didn't pay me to write this). Modest Mouse was in there, acting like wankers. Showing off, hogging the mic, being really obnoxious and the singer was snotty to me and my friends. Once we said "aren't you Modest Mouse?" then suddenly they were all sweet and polite and they bounced right after that. As in, "oh shit, we can't act like cunts anymore, they know who we are". Whatever. The band is tight, but have a listen, the singer sucks ass. He must purposely sing out of tune and all over the place. Have a listen, then you will know what I mean. He's a pretentious twat.
Oh LORD I am totally off the subject now, which is HOW WONDERFUL Mr. West is! I asked him about this rumor, about him storming out of the award show in a sour grapes mood. He said "It's true" but then told me the whole story, the part the press so conveniently over looks when taking the piss out of him, you know, slagging him off. Ok, for you yanks, when they are being really mean and writing bad about him. (see why British/Irish slang is so useful? It gets to the point faster).
The missing part of the story is that his management and record company told him his video had won Video of the Year, and insisted that he attend this ceremony.
Here is what you find when you google this crap:
Kanye West, you may remember, stormed the stage at the MTV Europe Music Awards in Denmark last week, interrupting the winners' speech, claiming his video deserved the "Best Video" Award for "Touch the Sky," which lost to Justice vs. Simian's project "We Are Your Friends."
No fucking WONDER he was pissed off! He was lied to. He was told his video had won. So he was lead there under false pretenses. I just think it's unfair how the press leaves shit out. So you can't say they are lying, because they just leave shit out. Guys all over can relate with that method, as they use it all the time when explaining to their better half where they fuck they have been, etc.
I think he's cool. He was calm, friendly, intelligent, generous, very funny and had NO ego or attitude at all. I am not an ass kisser/brown noser, I am honest. The guy is wonderful. I know it's tabu to say, but he has an amazing ass. I told him too, so there.
x
ps. The only bad thing about me working until 4am and now still up online until 7:30 am, is I will be too tired to go and try to massage Lou Reed later today. Oh well, I think he is over rated anyways. Sweet Jane and take a walk on the wild side are not enough to cut into my 8 hours of sleep (Sour Grapes). Dragging my cranky ass into bed now.
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< Dressed for my “Mary” skit 
(Lets play “name that German!”)
