Q.
I am LIVID. I caught my fiance’ cheating on me a week after he proposed to me.
Is it unethical to ask you for advice on how to get revenge? I need it bad.
Hell Bent Halle
A.
There is one web site out there that you can post naked pictures of your ex boyfriend,
have a look: http://www.nakedpicturesofmyexboyfriend.com/
My current flame always says "revenge is best served cold", as in, if you
tried to get back at him too fast, he would know it was you, so take your time
planning your revenge and let it rip when it’s ready to serve.
You could do what Samantha from Sex and the City did and photo copy the naked
pictures and post them all around his work building and neighborhood, etc, and
write something on the photo copy like "BOB is a Shit Sticker" (gay) or
something else clever like that. However, the best response is no response, try to
find something constructive to do with your rage, like blow his best friend, or
his Dad ( have a heart: only if Dad is single).
Q.
My boyfriend is older than me (he is 22 and I am 13). We had sex the other
night in the park and I was wondering if a guy fucks you up the ass and hes not wearing a condom and
he cums up there what will happen? I mean, I couldn’t get pregnant could I? I am scared now.
Bobby-Jo
< Loves young trim
A.
First of all, is his name R. Kelly per chance? If so, expect to see a video of
your romp on line in the near future.
Trying not to pass judgment here but he sounds a bit too advanced/old for
you. There are no reproductive organs up
your poop shoot, so relax, you can’t get pregnant from anal sex. You should
always use condoms, no matter what hole you are "celebrating", especially anal sex.
Q.
I have been dating a girl for 4 months. Our sex life is great. I have no
complaints except for kissing. I love to kiss and she is a terrible kisser.
She opens her mouth too wide and uses only her tongue. I have tried
different things like asking her
to hold her mouth still and let me kiss her hoping she can see how I like to
kiss. Didn’t work.I know everyone kisses different but I hate kissing her
and am loosing one of my favorite parts of being in a relationship. What do
I do?
Good-Guy
A.
Sorry, but if she can’t learn to kiss you properly, it’s a deal breaker.
Kissing is super important. You have to enjoy it and even like their smell and
taste in order for it to work.
You’ve tried to teach her, she is too stubborn/dumb/thick to catch on, so she’s gotta go. If you can’t
bare to leave her, make the best of her wide mouth and eager tongue and Introduce her to your balls.
Q.
My boyfriend of 11 months and I finally broke up after an intense, passionate
but havoc ridden relationship. I know
he loves me as much as I love him, but jealousy (from his side) drove us
apart. ONLY ten days after our break,
I called to say hello and check up on him (read: get him back) and a girl
answered his phone (it was 2am). The next
day he emailed me and said "you woke us up. Yes, she is my new girl and she is
PERFECT for me". I am shocked in thinking
he can move on so quickly. I was sure we were just on a break, didn’t think it
was THE break. How fast does it
take for most people to move on? Are men heartless turds?
Ms. Venice
A.
You sound gutted, like someone ripped your heart out. Welcome to love. Love is
like a dream, it hurts the most when you wake up. It usually takes women longer to get over a heart break. Men
numb the pain with beer, Friends and new pussy. Good thing is, once the woman is finally over the man, it’s REALLY
history. After the novelty of the fresh meat and beer wears off, the men tend to get sentimental and try to get their
ex back.
I smell foul play in your situation. Sounds like he had been working on this
other girl for a while as nobody lets a person they just met answer their phone. He met, fell for and got THAT
close within two weeks? BULLSHIT.
Just move on. If you can be that easily replaced, you should be happy you got
that jealous (he was probably so jealous because HE was up to no good), lying asshole out of your life.
Think: "NEXT!".
< tilt head to the right to read