Q.
I need sexual tips that will make my husband happy in bed. I am fat and this makes me very unhappy,
but i still want to make my husband happy in bed.
Chubby Cher
A.
If you’re unhappy about being "fat" then you should find time to go for fast walks as often
as you can. But that’s a whole different story. If you are heavy, the best position for sex
is doggy style or the old fashioned missionary position. You should make him sit on the corner
of the bed, with you kneeling in front of him. You can give titty fuck him and blow him, both
of which will please him and he won’t be looking at your chubby body, just your face and breasts.
Many men like big women, but if it is making YOU unhappy, then get moving and get in shape. You will
have more energy and it will increase your sexual appetite and most importantly, you won’t be limited
in sexual posistions any longer. If you can’t be bothered losing weight, keep in mind "the Bigger the cushion,
the better the pushin’". Frank Zappa.
Q.
Is there a way to shave your pussy and not get little red, painful/itchy bumps everywhere?
It’s always nice and smooth the day I shave but the next day it looks like I have the chicken pox
on my pussy.Please help me.I have tried everything I can think of.
A.
If you know someone will be viewing/touching your nicely shaved areas, then wait until that day to shave,
as the second day is when the hairs start to poke through again and if they get irritated with sweat,
perfume or heat, they can cause red bumps. There is a lotion called Tend Skin that you can put on the
freshly shaved areas AFTER the skin dries. If you can’t find Tend Skin you can soak some cotton balls with
alcohol and aloe Vera gel and saturate the shaved area, then let air dry. Also, change your razor blades
as often as you can afford to and avoid cheap razors, this is one area you shouldn’t try to cut corners.
Q.
The other day my boyfriend and myself were having sex and he urinated inside of me. I was wondering what,
if anything it would do to me.
A.
What a sick bastard. Was he too lazy to get up and piss in the toilet? It’s unhygienic and disgusting to piss
inside of someone else. If you start itching, you may want to drag it to the Gynecologists office, have fun
explaining that one.
Q.
I have been with a girl now for 8 months. We’re not legitimately going out but essentially we are.
I’m a very sexual person and she also seems to be, but I am her first "boyfriend" and the first person she has done anything sexual with. Yet throughout our sexual relationship, she has never reached orgasm!
This bothers me mainly because I would think of myself as very good at giving pleasure, due to my past experiences with girls, always getting them to climax in obvious gratification. The problem is I can get her moaning and squirming but she gets to a point that seems like unbearable pleasure and she can’t go any further! I’ve never encountered a girl who can’t bear to go on and I often wonder if it’s psychological as opposed to physical, yet she seems completely and utterly comfortable with me so I can’t imagine why it would be a problem in her mind. Excuse the frustrated rant, I would appreciate any help you could give!
Thank you, – Thwarted Tom
Faking it is easy ^
A.
"Always getting them to climax". Ha ha. Sorry to be the one to drop the bomb, but A LOT of women fake it just to get it over with, so, using the term "always" is just naive. MANY women have a problem climaxing. I personally know a large number of females who can’t cum with a partner, only with themselves and I know a few who can’t cum at all. I think she is just being honest, she moans and squirms when it feels good, but she doesn’t fake it. Many would. Try giving her oral sex, takes patients and time, but ask her where is the right spot and stick with it for at least 20 minutes. Don’t change and move around, or you will have to start from scratch. You should also ask her OUTSIDE of the bed room, if she masturbates and if so, how long does it take for her to cum. Since she seems so comfortable with you, talking about these things will make things in bed much easier. One more thing, just because a woman doesn’t have an orgasm, doesn’t mean she didn’t enjoy you banging her. Women can have just as much fun without the big O. It’s nice, but not mandatory, we don’t have a stiff cock and bursting balls distracting us constantly. Amen.