Ask Dr. Dot

Dear Dr. Dot,

I am a drug addict who has been clean for the past year, until my relapse… AGAIN the past two weeks. Been to numerous rehabs, but still chose to do drugs again. I am extremely depressed! My job is on the line. What do I do?? Help please!



Dear Jessica,

If you can’t shake that addictive behavior, then find something else, something safer to be addicted to. Try sex, music, or fitness, ANYTHING but drugs. We are only here once on this earth, you are wasting time when you drink or do drugs (in excess). If you can’t seem to do those things in moderation, then don’t do them at all. I really don’t see the point in doing those things, as I have seen many people, including some very close to me; take their own life with drugs. It’s just a slow suicide that hurts everyone around you. It is selfish and dumb. Just quit cold turkey and ask yourself, “what is really bothering me?” Is your job boring? Unhappy with your love life? Don’t like the area you live in? ALL of those things can be changed! Just do it! I have changed my life so many times, and it feels great every time. You have nothing to lose if you are already down that low.  Dr. Dot

Dear Dr. Dot,

My woman insists she is too chubby, but I like her as she is. She is always moaning about dieting and how we have to do it in the dark because she is shy about her full figure. She is taking diet pills and it makes her cranky. How can I finally convince her that I like her plump? Am I the only man that likes women big?


Dear Justin,

No, you are not the only guy who likes ’em big. Frank Zappa has a song that goes “Who wants to ride on an ironing board? That ain’t no fun, I tried me one; the bigger the cushion, the better the pushin”. When your girl mentions her flab again, say, “look honey, obviously I find you sexy, otherwise I wouldn’t keep trying to shag you.” Run that Zappa quote by her and bring some humor into the situation. Tell her you LOVE her big cushion!  Dr. Dot