Tag: sex

Posted on

Ask Dr. Dot October 2009

 Please feel free to email me your questions. I answer every email personally. Don't worry, I always change the names around, so no one will know your questions or secrets. Dr. Dot drdot@drdot.com

 

Q.


  I'm married for 5 years; we've been together for about 15. Two  kids, happy. The thing is that I don't like sex.

I could literally go for the rest of my life without it and be fine with that. For a while I thought it was just him that I wasn't
 attracted to, but even in between our dating, I was like that with EVERY guy.
I'm not a lesbian; women don’t turn me on that way. I get turned on by men,
but don't like sex. Goes back to Endometriosis and pain I had a hysterectomy at 28,
 but still don’t like sex. I love and adore my husband. He's sexy but due to my lack of sex drive, our sex life is slacking.

I haven't yet said anything to him, but I feel bad about it and wouldn't be completely objected to him
sleeping with someone else just to get that part of him satisfied. In that past I would
have NEVER dreamed of oral sex, but over the past year or two, I've been doing it occasionally
just to get out of having sex. Sure, I have to stop every few seconds to stop myself
from gagging or throwing up. But I still do it. Also, I still refuse to receive it.
This CAN'T be normal?"
Honest Housewife

 

 

 

A.


I know a few women like this. I am not saying it’s normal, but it's not rare either.
 Remember Bill and Hilary? You have two kids already and are not opposed to him getting his jollies elsewhere, so you know what you like and what you don't like.
However, if he does have sex with others, there may be a chance he’ll love the sex, gets used to it again, and may end up changing waterfalls, so to speak. MANY women fuck/suck their men just to shut them up (which is sad ) so you’re not alone. Perhaps I am a freak but I think knowing you HAVE to do it, is a turn off, hence marriage can be a catch 22 situation. You marry for love, but the pressure of routine kills the passion. It's best to be honest with yourself and your partner and put all of your cards on the table and see what he says.
It may even make you wet; being completely honest, to the point where you
just don't give a fuck about the consequences, can be so enlightening, that it's a turn
on. Who knows, it may just flip your switch back on.

Q.
My penis is 1 inch when floppy; 2 when hard. I’m only 14 and I have heard it
 will grow when you get older but it has been this way since my balls have dropped.
 I was about to get a blow job; when I pulled my pants down, she laughed and told
 the whole school. I really want it to grow to at least average size so that I
won't have to be afraid to show it off when I am asked to. Help.
The Angry Inch

 

 

A.
You have to accept that you’ll never have a monster cock, but you can make it a tad
bigger by using it as much as you can, be it by wanking or screwing. Like I’ve
said in the past, it’s similar to any other muscle; the more you exercise
it, the stronger (and bigger) it will grow. You should learn to be an expert
at giving foot massages and licking pussy, that will be your secret weapon. Making
the ladies laugh will also help them over look any "short" comings you have. Asian
girls have the tightest pussies (um, I’ve been told) so maybe gravitate towards them,
 they may even think of your tiny tool as hard to handle. Ps. Does your mom know you read my column?

Q.
 I have been married for 13 years.  In the beginning, as with most couples,
sex was frequent and fulfilling.  Frequency diminished over the years, yet it
was always fulfilling. 3 years ago, during sex, my husband had a heart attack.
An ambulance rushed him to the hospital.  That was the last time we had sex.
I have tried to be understanding and thankful he is still alive, yet I need
to have sex.  He claims that all sexual desire is now gone.  I do realize he is frightened
about what happened, but how can  someone totally lose ALL desire?  He definitely
doesn’t have a girlfriend, nor masturbate.
I suggested that we just fool around and not have sex.  I have made
offers to have a girlfriend join us, one of his biggest fantasies.  I have even
masturbated when we go to bed, trying to "guilt" him into touching me. 
To no avail. My sex drive is like that of a 17 year old boy.  I masturbate, at least,
twice a day.  I’m dying here.  How can I help him regain sexual desire?

Camarillo Brillo

 

A.
Dr. Phil and Ophra would probably tell you do drag him to an expensive marriage
counselor that would take ages and may or may not work but would certainly take
a private, sensitive subject and make it even more sensitive & turn a passionate,
spontaneous ritual into an annoying chore for him. How about going away for the
weekend, camping or staying at a hotel and just go down on him in the shower.
I think your bedroom and that bed will always remind him of almost dying in your
pussy. You need to change the surroundings before even attempting to shag him again.
If none of that works, come right out and tell him you need sex and he should
either fuck you or give you permission to fuck someone else (he can watch?) or
you may end up cheating without his knowledge or leaving him all together. A hungry
pussy should never go to waste.
Ps. maybe you and the “Honest Housewife” should
trade spouses every weekend.

Q.


 I have been here in NYC for 4 years and am like many others, not from here originally.
 However, at 36,  I am older than the average new immigrant.  I am also black,
well-educated and traveled, have good social skills and am employed.  (Read, "not of the young and tragically hip")

  In the last 3 years, I have had plenty of sex, and a couple of long-term lovers with whom I have enjoyed more than time in bed.
 But, once I decided I wanted to look for more, my search has yielded nothing. I haven't yet met anyone with whom I am mutually
attracted and who also has an interest in a long-term relationship.  I am not too picky: cute, smart, funny, mature, and sexually confident
can't be too much to ask for someone in my age group, right?

 I do the dating sites regularly, meet people constantly, and can even count a number of my former dates among my pool of friends.
 But in the last month alone, the number of married or partnered men who answer my ad suggesting an affair has been depressing.
(I'm not a moralist about it, just not interested.)  And the number of single people I meet who believe asking for a 2nd date 3
 weeks after the first is staggering. (And, just for clarification, those are not sex dates.)
I am tired of being single! I want a partner!  I have been reading your column faithfully, and it seems that your overall assertion is
 that Manhattan is not the place for partner-minded people.
 Surely there are strategies or gathering sites for we similarly afflicted people even in the city of the Swingin' Singles?
Or should I seriously consider a(nother) move?

Somebody to Love, Sadie

 

A.


Big cities all have one thing in common:
The masses of people/oportunities make it difficult to concentrate on just one person; one relationship. It's easier in the suburbs
 and country to find a partner to settle down with, simply because there are less people to choose from and less going on.
 Big cities like NYC are crawling with sexy young singles and although it's an aphrodisiac, it can also be torture for
 monogamous minded peeps.  Unless you are willing
to move to a small town and start over, I suggest placing ads and being VERY specific  about your needs.
I placed an ad for a girlfriend a few years ago, just for fun. I wrote it for her as she was too shy.
I was really blatant in the ad, stating "Sexy, Single woman wants generous, nonsmoking, relationship
minded man. Send pics if you want a reply". She got over 50 replies and on the 3rd date she met her current husband/father
of their child. They are still together and that was 9 years ago. There IS love in Manhattan; there's just too much of it.
 You have to be more aggressive when courting a long term love here as the hetero men have the advantage of being outnumbered
 by women (and gay males) two times over, which leaves the single women very few single, straight men to choose from.
 So, either be more specific in your ads, turn “bi” to increase your chances or stop looking all together, as if you've given up;
 and love may sneak up on you (a watched pot never boils) or move to a smaller city, one where meeting people is a
 bit easier as Nyc, the city of fun,
will never change, it loves to be "single, but dating".

Q.


I am currently seeing this 28 year old – I'm 31.  It's been 9 months.  I know all his friends, his parents,
and he wants to see me, calls, etc..
We have had a few dramas – what beauties – but in the end we worked thru it and we keep moving forward.
We are both fireballs and a little stubborn – him more than me, but he is patient and forgiving. We are both 'catches'.
 The problem: he is not verbal at all – but when I mention it, he does try to correct it. There is very little talk of future.
 I asked him over dinner if he saw me in his future and he said “yes”, and that he “doesn't waste time”.
Is the non-verbal thing ok, if he is showing in other ways? Should I stay in this and keep flowing or change
 it by breaking up? Part of me thinks maybe he'll never be ready.

Ms. Stay or go


A.

You asked a question I would personally never, ever ask a man: "do you see us sharing a future?". That is a waste of breath
and shows them you are insecure and aiming at putting pressure on them. He said "yes, I don't waste time". This should have
made you feel really confident, but you are still questioning the relationship. You seem to be looking for a way out,
 in my opinion. Love doesn't come with insurance and all we have is today. You can not ensure a future with anyone.
You can get hit by a car; he could die of cancer. Just chill and enjoy the present with
this man who seems to really love you (you met his parents, friends, he verbalized seeing you in his future).
So what he isn't verbal? If you want verbal, date a woman.

 


Posted on

Ask Dr Dot Aug. 25 2009


 I have been writing "Ask Dr. Dot" for over 7 years now. My advice column appears in the Exberliner magazine, NY Rock.com and as "Calling Dr. Dot" in Penthouse forum. Feel free to email me (drdot@drdot.com)  any questions you may have. I answer them free and always change the names around to protect your little secrets from everyone else. 

Dr. Dot

 

Q.


I'm a young "forty something" lady. I've been invited to a concert where I may get
an opportunity to meet some famous dudes. (Aerosmith)
There are going to be tons of little skinny ass chicks(yes I'm jealous), and I just
 want to look hot. Not disgusting, but ya know, it would be nice to be "kinda hot
for a forty year old." I don't have a clue what to wear. I don’t want to be in
running shoes, like eww. Help.
Any pointers?
ps. You always look good.
Mary (from the bus, last tour, you know, leather?)

 

 

A.


Decide what your best assets are-
if they are your breasts, wear a low cut shirt in navy blue and a back pencil cut
skirt to the knees and fancy flip flops or those ballerina shoes in silver. If your
 best asset is your tiny waist, wear a sun dress that has frills where your tiny
 breast sit and again, simple but comfy shoes (high heels make women miserable after a few hours).

Go easy on the make up and hair, focus on your best feature on your face as well and
avoid red lip stick unless your skin and teeth are flawless. Use my secret weapon,
"Hypnotic Poison" and smile no matter what. When speaking, remember, quality, not
quantity works best. If you meet Steve, tell him Dr. Dot says hello. Also, keep in mind,
 I am pretty sure all of the band are taken, as in, in a relationship, so there is no
 need going through hell trying to lure one of them; just be comfortable in your own skin,
 smell nice, smile and radiate confidence which is the sexiest thing of all.
ps. If you don't want to wear a skirt, you could wear Capri’s. Make sure you use a shimmer
 body lotion that makes skin look amazing.

 

Q.


 I'm really puzzled by the fact that my boyfriend would rather eat me out than have sex.
 We see each other a few days a week and have had sex only once in our 3 month relationship
 everything else has been oral, him giving it to me; he never lets me give it to him. It's
like he's crazy about it, that’s all he wants to do. What's going on? Is there something going on?
Suzy Cream Cheese

 

 

A.


If that's your only problem, consider yourself blessed. A man who only wants to lick your
pussy and wants nothing in return? Hold on tight to him. You have obviously seen his cock.
Could it be too small or soft?  Maybe he’s afraid of disappointing you.  Maybe he is afraid
of getting you pregnant (read: Catholic). Many men don't trust condoms or even the pill due
 to former bad experiences ("surprise" pregnancies). Perhaps you just taste so fucking good
 he is addicted. Don't look a gift horse, or cunnilingus master in the mouth.

 

 

 

Q.

I am about to propose to the love of my life. Her brother recently died in
Iraq (why do we send away our young men to this country to far away land and
get them back in boxes; all a mother has left of her son is a fucking flag!).

She cries everyday. I feel helpless.

Should I propose soon….and that will give her some happiness to
take away the pain, or should I wait till everything has settled. I would
marry her Monday if I could, but I just want to get it right for her.

Mr. Right

 

 

A.


I would wait a couple weeks, maybe even a month until after the funeral,
and then propose to her.
You don't want your wedding anniversary to be too close to his death date.
If you do it too soon, she could think of it as just a romantic pity party.
If you wait too long, she could close her heart to love all together and
need a long time to completely open it again.

 

 

Q.


My ex is from Poland and went over there to see her…bout 5 months back anyway
we met at airport, had 4 hour journey back to her place was 7 am!! I was sooo tired
 but she said “lets do it- do you have condom?” Well I did but feeling so tired I
 just didn’t want to…i.e. I’d of been shit lol. So we didn’t and didn’t have
opportunity to do it again. Anyway, I got back home and she ended it per text
message about month later. That got me thinking. I loved her; maybe if did make
love to her on that occasion our relationship would’ve lasted longer? Looking back
 I kinda feel guilty over it. I am dumbfounded and gutted.
Mr. Pitiful

 

 

A.


I’ve had men visit me in the past from far away and I knew for sure they would fall
 fast asleep due to the journey. So I let them be. I expect the same when I visit someone.
 There should be some sort of sexual travel leeway period; an unofficial "leave me
alone for 24 hours please" phase. I think she just used that pathetic excuse to dump you.
 If someone dumps you for that, they aren't even worth thinking about anymore.
 Be grateful you are rid of that impatient wench.

 

 

 
Q.


Please cough up some advice for me ASAP. I have seriously not told ANYONE what I'm about
 to tell you, but this issue is getting too big for me to ignore.
 Basically, my problem is this: I'm in a serious relationship with a sweet but somewhat
 insecure man. He is extremely concerned with making me happy in bed, and after some
 awkward attempts at the beginning of our relationship, he worked really hard to find
out what I liked and is now able to satisfy me nine times out of ten. So it's not out
of sexual frustration that I've started having fantasies about women more and more recently.
 It's something I've always done from time to time, but now for the first time I feel
like I might want to put it into practice. I really want to involve my
 boyfriend in this, at least tell him how I've been feeling, but there's a problem: His
last girlfriend left him for a woman, and he's very touchy on the subject of girl-on-girl.
 He's not against lesbians by any means, but he gets visibly uncomfortable whenever the
subject comes up, changing the topic of conversation, even changing the channel when two
women get friendly on TV. I care about him so much,
and I'm afraid my desires will chase him away. I don't know what to do. Can you help??
 
Potentially Bi in Harlem

 

 

A.


I would love to know if these lesbo fantasies started before or after you found out about
 his ex dumping him for a dike. Be honest and think back. If you started lusting after
women AFTER he told you this, it's simple; you are playing with the forbidden fire.
You know it's taboo and now crave it madly. If not, and you have always wanted to taste
the bearded clam, but want to keep your man,  you should just do this on your own time,
without telling him, as it's obviously not going to work. Give the guy a break. Put yourself
 in his shoes. At all cost, try your best to hide all evidence of your lesbian adventures.
Asking him will only make him more insecure, jealous and you may end up losing him completely.

 

 

 

Q.


I am a proud lady who masturbates on a daily basis. My technique has become
refined in the most recent years and lately I have noticed something… When I
have a very good strong orgasm; my hearing is somewhat diminished. Similar to
when your ears start to go towards popping when going up an elevator. 5 minutes
later my hearing is back to normal. Is this because the blood is rushing from my
ears to my vagina?

Alotta Vagina

 

 

 

 

A.


Good news is, it is fairly normal. Bad news is, I'm gonna have to get all medical
on you to explain it properly. Take a deep breath and read on.
The ear popping is due to excessive dopamine-adrenalin conversion during orgasm while
your tissue and nerve around and in your ear lack of the relaxin/elastin Prostaglandin
to withhold the orgasmic contraction due to a sequence of adrenalin surges during or after orgasm.
 Your auditory nerve is suddenly compressed by the tissue contraction and suffers from
the interruption of nutritional supply due to a sudden contraction of the arteries.
This results in nervous numbness. It can happen in your face, ears, nose, eyes, hands,
legs, pelvic area, or even your whole body. Whew.  Who needs to hear anything after they
climax? I think its mother natures way of shutting everything else out so you can just
 savor the spectacular moments during and after your orgasm.

 

 

Posted on

Ask Dr. Dot July 2009

Feel free to email me your questions. I will change your name to protect your identity and your little secret will stay with me: drdot@drdot.com


Q.
I was wondering if you have a solution for me. I am a
37 year old man, not well hung but know how to use what
I have well and I am very good with my hands and mouth
BUT it bothers me and the women I sleep with that I just
can't seem to get or stay hard. When I beat off, it is fine,
I get hard and I cum, it's all-good. But when it comes time
 to perform for my girls, my member seems to want to nap.
 I don't even stay hard enough to wear a condom and this
scares away most of my prey. Please help me; I am good
looking, eager and very passionate.

Mr. Boooi oinnnng

 

 

A.
It sounds like you may have Erectile Dysfunction. You may
 not like going to a Doctor but you have to see a trained
physician, specifically, an urologist, in order to suss out
what is going down with your cock. You can always try over
 the counter sexual enhancements for men, or if the
Doctor approves it, Viagra. Viagra may make you feel sick
to your stomach and give you headaches but if the Doc gives
you the green light, it may help you in times of need. Not being
able to wear a condom is bad news; please go get your pecker
 checked out. If you are too stubborn to visit a Doctor, they you
will just have to rely on vibrators and your tongue to please your girls.

 

 

 

 

 

Q.
I have recently found a gay boyfriend who I have just started to have
 penetrative sex with.
 I have found that as he penetrates me I loose my erection, and no
amount of masturbation will bring it back while he is inside me.
 
As he doesn't like being penetrated I can’t find out if it is the same for
him, and I don't want to insist incase I loose him. Is this normal or is
there some thing wrong?
 Neither of us knows, as we are both pretty new to this.

Boy Toy Bart

 

A.
Blood rushes to any area of the body that is being stimulated that is
why the penis gets hard when it is being stimulated.
If your ass is being stimulated, the blood goes there, leaving your
cock less blood and making it soft. One may wonder why this isn't
 so in porn. They are taking massive amounts of Viagra in porn to
keep everything hard and full of blood. Everything always seem better
 in the movies, innit?

Q.

My wife could care less if we fuck or not.  She has encouraged me to fuck
 other girls but insists that I tell her before or ASAP after it happens.
 I’ve encouraged her to go out and do the same but made her promise she
 WOULDN'T tell me about it. (I doubt she would shag around)

The other day I told her we needed to pick up some condoms before I went
 out with my friends.  She hit the fucking roof, "So you’re telling me you’re
going out to fuck another woman?!" After some awkward conversation and joking,
we laughed and just left it at that.

Later, whilst shopping, we walked by the “family planning” section and she motioned
 to the condoms but I just ignored it and we kept walking. Seems like I am in
 checkmate. Help.

Bobby Brown

 

 

 

 

A.
When you say, "encouraged" I wonder exactly in what way. Many people say,
 "feel free to fuck around, just give my genitals a break" but they usually don't
mean it. You were just trying to be honest when you mentioned that you needed
to get some condoms but that is being a bit too honest. Do your thing but keep
it out of her sight at all times; as she doesn't want to know for the same reason
you don't want to know. It's just too much information. What one doesn't know
 won't annoy the fuck out of them. If you slip up someday and she catches wind
of any infidelity, you can naturally fall back on the "well, you DID mention I should
fuck around" but try your best to keep it out of sight and mind to protect her
feelings and your balls from being cut off with a kitchen knife.

 

 

Q.

Wow this is embarrassing but here goes. I'm a 38-year-old English bloke here in
Berlin and have been single for five years now. Am well and truly over my last
 relationship – we lived together for three years and she broke my heart – but
now the past is a completely different country; I don't live there anymore.
I have no baggage.

The past few years I've only had the odd one night stand here and there, but to
be perfectly honest I'm not that kind of guy. I've never really enjoyed that sort
of thing anyway and besides I always feel closer, more intimate with someone
that I truly care for. And hopefully vice-versa.

But here's the deal. Right now I just can't seem to get a date for love nor money.
And it's starting to drive me nuts! Is it just the Dead Girls of Berlin Syndrome?

"Maybe it's the water, mama
 Maybe it's the tea
 Maybe it's the way they was raised
 Maybe it's the stuff what they read in the papers
 Keeps them lookin' sorta half in a daze
 Well the dead girls of Berlin
 Why do they act that way?"

I've always found that when I'm not in Germany it's much easier to meet women.
Am I just being too shy? Need more confidence? Could it be the language barrier?

It's not the sort of thing I can discuss with the "guys". So I thought, what the hell
and just ask the Doc. I just want to meet someone, have a happy fulfilling and
best-case scenario, loving relationship.

British Bob

 

 

 

A.

 The bigger the city the more aggressive you have to pursue women simply
 because city folks learn to tune things out in order to keep their sanity. You
have to stand out and take chances. If you chat up 50 women, surely you will
 get at least 5 great dates. So take risks, we only live once, a "nein, danke" or
 "fuck off" won't kill you. Join a yoga class, it will keep you fit and you will be
surrounded by flexible women. You will be out numbered, ditto with a cooking
class or dance class. As far as language being a problem, it should work for you,
 not against you as you are a foreigner, aka "exotic" and any German you learn
will surely be spoken with a cute accent, which should drive the girls mad. No
time to waste, summer is here and the egg surely doesn't go chase the sperm
 not does it?

 


Q.
My guy and I have been together 7 years and I have never let him cum in my mouth
 let alone swallow the stuff. It really makes me wanna gag. To be honest I don't even
 know what his tastes like but before he even thinks about cumming in my mouth I
start making some really funny faces which he says is a huge turn off. I let him cum
in my mouth once, but I just wanted to barf all over him and I opened the car door and
 spit it all out before I could even taste it. I think this phobia might stem from the first
 time a guy came in my mouth. It was a complete surprise and it was the funkiest tasting
 spunk. I like to describe it as seawater but chunkier. I know it would turn my boyfriend
on so much if I would just let him. Do you have any advice on how I can get over this
 little sperm phobia of mine? If I can just get to the point of letting him finish off in my
mouth without making scary faces at him or gag sounds, that would be great. I do want
 to satisfy him but at the same time I was wondering how common is it for a guy to cum
in a girls mouth? Is this something that all girls do for their boyfriends? I think he has
just been watching one too many pornos.

 
Spunkaphobe 

A.
 Swallowing a man's tide shows that you accept him, every drop of him. His sperm is his
 personal liquid gold, their most valuable juice and if you won't swallow it, it's kind of like
 saying "you aren't good enough to swallow" and hence, they get pissed off/disappointed.
If his spunk smells or taste funny to you, it is nature's way of telling you "don't breed with
this fucker" If you are in love, you should want to swallow his spunk (unless it's super
chunk-clam-chowder style, then anyone would understand the resistance. But if you just
can't seem to bring yourself to do so, then tell the guy up front "I will suck you ' till the cows
come home, but I don't swallow. If you have a problem with that, then we will just skip the
whole blow job part of our relationship". This should solve that problem immediately, as most
 men would choose a non-swallow blow-job over no blow-job at all.

BUT if you really want to give it a try, suck his cock, as you do, best to keep tip in your mouth and
firmly rub his cock up and down in rhythm with your mouth and use other hand to cup his
balls gently. When you sense he is ready to shoot his load, try to aim it towards the side of
your mouth then quickly store it in your cheeks like a hamster does all those seeds.

Then, without missing a beat, swallow it bit by bit so you don't choke on it (this is if he is
really paying attention to see if you really swallow it or not), otherwise, if he is all wrapped
up in his orgasm with eyes rolled back in head, in heaven, you can quickly, swiftly and
quietly pour the spunk into your hand then wipe it on the sheets, rug, dog, his pants, what
ever is around. He will never know.

 

Posted on

Jimi Hendrix made a sex tape? I smell BULLSHIT

I just got done watching the “Jimi Hendrix sex tape ” dvd. I am sick to my stomach. This is NOT Jimi Hendrix. It is a very poor quality video of some unconscious black man. Two disgusting naked Women, presumably Russian from the looks of it, are TRYING to have sex with this lifeless man (he could very well be deceased who knows?) and the girls are looking into the camera most of the time. The man does not have any sort of erection whatsoever. He is LIFELESS and LIMP in every way possible. The DVD production company paid $10,000 EACH (to make it seem legit enough to sell) to Super Groupie Pamela Desbarres (only famous for fucking rock stars) and Cynthia Plaster Caster (only famous for making casts of Rock Star penises). These two bimbos are super enthusiastic after being paid to be, about this “definitely being Jimi’s cock! I would recognize it anywhere”.

“it’s NOT him!” https://www.stuff.co.nz/entertainment/394304/Jimi-Hendrix-in-sex-tape-scandal

This is so vile. Jimi is not around to defend his own honor so I am doing it for him. These to money hungry has-beens should be ashamed to ever show their face in public again.

The DVD/Production company “Vivid” is even worse, offering $100,000 to anyone who can prove it is NOT Jimi (which they know is impossible) but anyone with eyeballs can SEE it is NOT Jimi in the shitty video. Read: https://blabbermouth.net/news/jimi-hendrix-porn-tape-purveyors-issue-100k-challenge

Pamela can kiss my ass for throwing Jimi under the bus like this.

Posted on

Ask Dr. Dot March 27 2009



Q.

Ok, here is my problem. I love women. I love women a lot. Maybe too much. The problem is
that most women can only get me excited one time and one time only. I look at them completely
different as soon as the act is finished. I don't even want to ever talk to them again.
I feel horrible. Like I am a bad person. I am 40 and see no sign of slowing down. Any
idea why I feel this way? Am I a fucking asshole? Am I a freak?
Johnny Apple-seed


A.


I feel the same way sometimes. You aren’t a “bad person” in fact being “fruitful and multiplying”
is what being a man is all about, genetically. I am sure a lot of people feel that way,
maybe not to that extreme, but a tad, it’s just they can’t do much about it, as relationships
and social responsibility renders the ‘love ‘em and leave ‘em’ routine. As long as you are
completely up front with your conquest before you dive in, and they are cool with your motto,
why beat yourself up over it? Maybe someday you will meet your match and fall in love. Hopefully

Posted on

Ask Dr. Dot February 2009


Please feel free to send me your questions. I will answer them and change your name so know one will know your dirty little secrets.

x

Dr. Dot

 

 

Q.


I'm getting divorced after 22 years of 'bliss'. My wife and I are like oil
and water. I haven't changed since she met me.  I’ve the same
interests; the most important one is a need for a loving sexual bond with my mate.
 I'm very physical. She’s never been, though at first she put on a good act.  She
 prefers intercourse more than anything else, and loathes oral.  Very rarely in our
years together has oral sex been something that she wanted; to give or receive either!
 All my other girlfriends before her, including my first wife who could cum at the
drop of a hat orally and otherwise, loved the way I licked their pussies.  My nickname
 is "Spock" because my ears had been pulled in ecstasy so many times. I recognize
that there is a technique that most men really can’t master. This is what I’ve been
 told by dozens of women over the years.

From the many articles I've read on the subject, it seems that often times, women who are
self-conscious about the way their box smells are typically the ones that hesitate to have
 their lovers go down on them for fear of grossing them out. I guess since taste is about
 75% smell, they also figure that their pussy tastes bad as well. I LOVE the way pussy
smells, tastes, looks, feels and even sounds!

That old joke 'once you get past the smell, you've got it licked' never made sense to me.
I totally love inhaling the scent of a woman! As I said, it adds to the sensuality.  I don't
think it has a damn thing to do with cleanliness.  In fact, the inside of a woman's pussy is
typically cleaner than the average mouth, when it comes to bacteria.

Bottom line question: in your experience, how common is it for women to loathe their
partner practicing cunnilingus on them, and why?

Bobby Brown (“watch me now, I'm goin' down.”)




A.


Licking pussy is like a lap dance for your taste buds? Lovely. But if your partner
doesn't like it, you can't force her to spread 'em. Most women do enjoy it, the first few
months, but may grow a bit bored of the same old thing; even if it's heavenly genital
licking. I am well aware of the fact men couldn't
imagine getting bored of head, but women can. If sex becomes routine, women tend to get a
"headache" or a mysterious second period that month. I hope you aren't divorcing her just
because of her lack of sexual appetite, as that same thing can happen with other,
women as well. If your mind is set on divorce, try to avoid getting married again and/or
living together with a woman if you thrive upon a sizzling sex life. I don't give a FUCK
how hot you/they are, seeing someone ALL the time, sex will get boring and even spectacular
oral becomes routine. Marriage and living together are so overrated and old fashioned. Sure,
 it's good for raising kids and trimming your taxes, but even that can be done successfully
 while living separately. It all depends what your priorities are; family, sex, free time,
 money, etc. It’s hard to have it all and as cliché as it sounds, absence still makes the
 heart (and genitals) grow fonder. Last but not least, some women simply don't enjoy having
their twat licked out. Some prefer to give and feel guilty getting pleasure and some ladies
are too nurturing and kind to tell their partner "I've got a spot that gets me hot, and you
 ain't been to it!"

 

 


Q.


I am only 19 but I am sexually active even though I am a tad shy. I have noticed that
 the few men I have slept with all want to “69”. I go with the flow, but to be honest
 I don’t like it. Why are men so hooked on this? I find it embarrassing to have someone
be face to face with my ass hole. What if they think it’s ugly? What are they THINKING
 when they are that close?
Firm & Fruity Fiona

 



A.


Why are they hooked on it? Exactly the same reason you hate it. They love the close up
 view of your twat and chocolate star fish in their face.  Don’t worry about them criticizing
 your crack, as I am sure they look upon it adoringly. I hate it for a different reason:
it’s unpractical. How can one enjoy receiving great oral when they have to concentrate on
giving great oral? What a stupid fucking concept. I am positive the 69 position was invented
 by some horny, unpractical, caveman. Another downside; there is always that chance your man
was in a hurry the last time he wiped his ass. Sniff.

 


Q.


I am recently divorced after a 25 year marriage.. During the entire 25 years,
I (we) never used a condom. I now find myself 'suddenly single', and the women I've
encountered insist on a condom. I completely understand the necessity of their use.
However, I just can't seem to move past the awkwardness and loss of sensation with their
use. In fact, I hate them!  Any suggestions?
Withering Willy

 


A.


No one likes them, not even us girls. Have the lucky lady suck on you while you unwrap
the condom. Say "do us a favor darling and keep me in your mouth while I wrestle with
this thing", make it fun and they will. Hopefully she will give you good head while you
get it ready, then quickly slip it on and slip in her as fast as you can.
It would be best to give her good oral, no, GREAT oral before the condom is even mentioned,
to make sure she got her fun before you possibly loose the nerve. If you go soft while
wearing the condom, try to make her cum with your mouth or hands and then wank off
onto her breasts or face…It may take time to train him to get used to the ol' wet
suit again I'm afraid. Find a girl to be monogamous with and perhaps you can ride bareback again.

 

Q.


My son is 21 and he is dating a 38 year old woman. She looks great for her age; very
youthful and she is fun, and I understand why my son loves her, but I can’t help but
wish she would just disappear and let me boy enjoy his youth. Should I just ignore this
potentially hazardous relationship or try to wake him out of this puppy love?
Mrs. Robinson

 

A.


When a person is 21, they can and will do whatever the fuck they want. You can buy him a
copy of the film Harold and Maude and hope he get’s your point, but as long as they are
both happy why make waves? The more you mention it to him, the more you will drive him
towards her. He has many years to experiment and fool around; she should be the worried
one, not you nor your young ripe son. Rather than trying to fight the Cougar trend, try
to love him unconditionally like a parent should. What will be, will be.

Posted on

Ask Dr. Dot January 2009

 

This is my Sex/relationship column. I have been writing it for over 6 years. It appears in the Exberliner magazine , Penthouse forum and NY Rock as well. I always change the names around, so feel free to ask me anything and I will answer you personally and it may even make the column

x


Q.
I cheated on my bf while I was on holiday and he found out. I don’t know why I did it.
My man has been exceptionally good to me. When I was exposed he just called me a slut
and walked off. The next day he came round and demanded to know the details, saying he
could not make up his mind about me till he knew everything. I could not say anything
 because I was crying so much I couldn’t talk. He is glad I admitted to it. Should I tell
 him all about how it happened? How can I get him to stay with me? I need him in my life.
 How long will it take for us to work this over? Should I buy him a present or something
 similar……right now he will not even kiss me.


Beaver Deceiver


 

A.
For some reason Men love to know the exact details when they catch their woman cheating
 (seen the movie "CLOSER" yet?). It's best not to give him the details, as if he does
 forgive you, which it sounds like he will (if he was really done with you, you wouldn't
 have heard back from him) then he will always have that scene running through his mind".
 Just write him an email or text and tell him you were drunk,
 missed him and that you regret it with every bone in your body; you are SORRY. That's all
 you can do. Giving him a gift or apologizing too much just makes you look even guiltier.
 You didn't LOVE this guy you fucked around with; it was just a physical thing, so it
shouldn't get blown out of proportion. It's not like you were seeing him for months and
fell in love, it was just a tryst. Men understand as they can usually separate love and lust.
 Tell him going into details is difficult as you were so drunk and you don't even want to
relive such a mistake. Assure him it won't happen again and sit back, be patient and give him
some space to think. Let HIM make the first move! Otherwise you will appear desperate and it
 will remind him that you are feeling guilty; not good. Ease your mind by knowing life will
go on & what's meant to be will be.

 

Q.
My guy keeps bugging me for anal sex. I have heard from ALL of my friends that it hurts and
 it’s unpleasant. He practically begs me, says “If you love me you’ll allow it at least once”.
 I do love him but his dick is already too big for my vagina. I need help, fast.


Exit Only Alice



A.
Men always think we LOVE having a hard cock rammed up our poop shoot because they see porn
stars begging for it in their “movies”. Fact is, it hurts; especially if the man is well hung.
 His begging for your tighter hole is similar to you begging for him to have a wider cock.
 If you let him try it once, he is bound to love your tight ass and will be gagging for it
all the time. If you’re against it, don’t open Pandora’s Box or it will be a major pain in the ass.



Q.


 I've been dating this girl for almost 7 months. Most of her guy friends
are guys that she has slept with in the past. She says that she has
only been with a few guys like 8 or something but she still hangs out
with half of them. Like going out to lunch and sometimes dinner. Always
exclusively and never with her friends while I'm at work. Is this good
girlfriend behavior? She says they are all just her friends and I believe
her but it makes me uncomfortable…I don't hang out with anybody that
I slept with in the past except one of my ex girlfriends who I dated
 and calls my girlfriend more than she calls me so that’s a lot different.
 Anyway one guy that she went to lunch with a week ago and also slept
 with in the past. Sent her a text message at like 10 or 11 at night
 asking her to hang out. She said she was watching a movie with me but
then he replied that he would try harder when she was single. That
really upset me and she was really upset when I brought it up she said
 that he was drunk and isn't like that normally. She didn't reply to the
text message after he said that. She also talks to her ex boyfriend of 4
 years a lot. Sending myspace comments back and forth and texting. He
 even brought her over a gift last week. She's pregnant.. with my baby.
  It's important to that I work these things out with her. What
 am I supposed to do here? Is it wrong for me to tell her that she
needs to cease relationships with past flings? How do I tell her that?


Nervously Neil

 


A.


Ok, she has all the power now. So you can not tell her what to do,
or even suggest it at this point. Do NOT mention them again!
Once the baby is born, she won't have any extra time for these
clingy fools. Just concentrate on her and put the blinders on to the
Ex boyfriends. They are her ex's; you are her guy and father to the baby.
You need to be more mature (I know they are aggravating and irritating
but do not let them win). Offer her foot rubs, lower back rubs and
just be fun to be with. She will want to be with you rather than them.
Like I said, when the baby comes, those wankers will just blend into the
Past; they will be history as her baby and you will keep her more than
busy and hopefully, content.

How to win ANY woman over ^

 


Q.


Why do all the best men end up with bitches? My husband and I have a male friend
 who is the perfect guy; he’s handsome, has money, is smart, ambitious & treats
women perfectly. Over the last 5 years I’ve seen him be screwed over repeatedly.
 He attracts moody, selfish women; of course in the beginning they’re nice.
 Quickly the worm turns & they mistreat him. This guy is a very confident,
successful business man. It pains me to see such a great man wasted. All these
bitches use him like a credit card. Double dates kill me! It’s not fair because
some of my girls swoon over him but he’s always taken by some slut and of course
 being the man he is he is very loyal, doesn’t flirt. Should I intervene?


Meddling Mary

 

A.
Ever heard the term "Treat 'em mean, keep 'em keen"? A lot of men LOVE to be treated
like that. It turns them on. It's a challenge. I am not defending the woman you are
moaning about, I am being neutral. You say they are usually "sluts". Hmm, I wonder
 what could possibly keep him around? Dirty, hot sex perhaps? Women who have the upper
 hand are usually very confident, and that’s a huge turn on for most men. Not all
men want an agreeable, good girl. As hard as it may be for you to witness, that is
 what he chooses and one can not change a man. Maybe someday he will get tired of
the demanding divas and snap up one of your "girls" but I wouldn't hold your breath
 or get involved. Count your blessings you have a blissful marriage and that
you’re out of the dating game.