The last few days I spent in Berlin, I was living off of 4 to 5 hours of sleep and loads of extra stress. I had ONE hour of sleep the “night” before I left for NYC so when I got on the plane, I was craving shut eye something fierce.
Finally back in NYC and started massaging as soon as I hit the ground.
Got a message that Adam of Maroon 5 wants a massage ASAP…
This was taken the last time I massaged Adam ^ and you can see his left arm wasn’t covered yet in his new tattoo:
Maroon 5 is on tour and I am handling their massage needs (sending out Dot Bots to any show they want a massage at) but Adam is in town just to finish his sleeve tattoo ^ above. I think it looks fucking awesome. Forgot the name of the tattoo artist, but I know it wasn’t done at Last Writes (where I had mine done).
Closer look ^
Anyways, after I massaged Adam I had to rush over to massage Billy Idol’s manager. I have also been taking care of the Billy Idol tour, massage wise. Going to see his show tomorrow here in the city. Super excited as he has BrianTichy on drums, I LOVE watching Brian play. OMG!!
Jasmine starts University tomorrow, another OMG. We are preparing and getting ready to move her into her dorm tomorrow early. Sleep is a thing of the past for me. Still getting over 400 emails per day too. I can hear my heart beating, it’s that loud. Heart attack approaching soon, stay tuned. lol. PLUS all of my regular clients all want a massage (They say they have been waiting months) and every friend and relative all want to chat on the phone, I am gonna snap. Hoping things settle down soon, but that is never the case when you are anywhere near NYC. This place is alive and kicking and the energy it radiates is contagious and can not be stopped. The weather here is AMAZING. Hot, sunny, nice breeze!! FINALLY I got a bit of summer. YAY!!
Jasmine wants to go power walking, gotta go
x
ps.NEWEST Maroon 5 tour dates:
Maroon 5 2013
02/25 Grand Rapids, MI- Van Andel Arena
02/27 Kansas City, MO- Sprint Center < Dr. Zach
03/01 Moline, IL- I Wireless Center
03/03 Omaha, NE- CenturyLink Center Omaha
03/04 Saint Paul, MN- Xcel Energy Center
03/07 Calgary, AB- Scotiabank Saddledome
03/09 Vancouver, BC- Rogers Arena
03/11 Seattle, WA- KeyArena at Seattle Center
03/13 San Jose, CA- HP Pavilion at San Jose
03/15 Los Angeles, CA- Staples Center
03/16 Las Vegas, NV- Mandalay Bay Events Center
03/19 Houston, TX- Toyota Center
03/21 Dallas, TX- American Airlines Center < ABBY
03/22 Tulsa, OK- BOK Center
03/24 Nashville, TN- Bridgestone Arena
03/26 Birmingham, AL- BJCC Arena
03/27 Atlanta, GA- Philips Arena < ALICE
03/29 Sunrise, FL- BB&T Center
03/30 Orlando, FL- Amway Center
04/01 Jacksonville, FL- Jacksonville Veterans Mem. Arena < BRANDI
04/03 Washington, DC- Verizon Center
04/04 Philadelphia, PA- Wells Fargo Center
04/06 Rosemont, IL- Allstate Arena
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“Dr. Dot gives the best massage in the world” – Sting
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“That was an amazing massage” – Vin Diesel
“First massage of my life, I am now a fan” – Gene Simmons of KISS
“Lovely touch” – Mark Knopfler
“I feel like a new woman after that massage Dot” – Sheryl Crow
“Awesome foot rub!” – Marky Ramone
“Thanks for healing us man. Peace” – Carlos Santana
“Dot’s massage was the only thing that kept me going and going” – Sean, singer of Audioweb
“Your massage brought me back to life, you healed me baby!” – R. Kelly
“I love your massage Dot” – Eros Ramazotti
“Hands of STEEL” – Dave Navarro
“I remember it was very quiet, music playing on a boom box, the lights down low,” he told The Associated Press. “She was very professional. She also didn’t talk a lot, which I particularly liked.”
– Gene Simmons of KISS
– “Thanks a million” Mariah Carey
– “That’s hot!” Paris Hilton (I’m not joking)
Satisfied Massage Clients include:
Mariah Carey – Eros Ramazotti – Back Street Boys – Peter Bond – Depeche Mode – Led Zeppelins Robert Plant – Hot House Flowers – Fugees – Rolling Stones – Sting – David Bowie Band – Tommy Lee & Mötley Crüe – British Bulldog – Rainbow – Credit to the nation – Krokus – The Clash – Steve Vai – AC/DC – Ratt – Blur – Inspiral Carpets – The Blushing Brides – Aerosmith – Skunk Anansie – Die Ärzte – Simply Red – Michael Jackson Band – Whitney Houston Band – Guildo Horn – Ramones – 60ft. Dolls – Van Halen – The Who – Tin Machine – The Misfits – Garbage – Tortoise – Stone Roses – Chris Jagger – The Undertaker (WWF) – Smoking Guns (WWF) – Bryan Ferry Band – Lenny Kravitz Band – N Sync – Fish-(NOT PHISH!) – Henry Rollins – Def Leppard – Ray Cokes of MTV – Alba Basketball Team – Nils Frewerth – Runrig – Bon Jovi – Red Hot Chilli Peppers – Heather Nova – Dread Zeppelin – Bush – The Pogues – Kinky Machine – Duran Duran – Happy Mondays – America – Ice T – Madness – Flock of Seagulls – Jesus Jones – The Alarm – Hans Klok (Dutch Magician) – Cucumber Men – Anthrax – Catatonia – Eric Clapton – Johannes B. Kerner – Keith Sweat Band – Oasis – Grateful Dead – Kiss – The Charlatans – Toni Braxton Band – Pulp – Andrew Strong Band – Weezer – Jay Z – Super Furry Animals – Billy Idol Band – Iggy Pops Band – Northside – The Romantics – Simple Minds – Calvin Russel – The Muffin Men – 38 Special – Finesse – Scarfo – Bob Geldof – Iron Maiden – Dirty Deeds – Offspring – Leningrad Cowboys – Norbert Blüm – Vera am Mittag – Matthias Wissmann – Stefan Raab – Esther Schweins – Sheryl Crow – Daniela Noack – Guano Apes – Courtney Love + Hole – Lynard Skynard – Alice Cooper Band – Traci BoyD – Cypress Hill – Blackeyed Peas – Foo Fighters – Ween – D-12 – Modern Talking – Alice Cooper – Papa Roach – David Byrne – Mark Knopfler – Die Happy – Nick Cave – Hed(p) – Annuschka – Steely Dan – Green Day – Joe Walsh – Truck Stop – R. Kelly – Cranberries – Vin Diesel – YES – Green Day – Bio Hazard – Soul Fly – Prince of Saudi Arabias gang – Dave Gahan – Bruce Willis – Robbie Williams band – Disturbed – Kylie Minouge – Russle Crowe – Chris Noth (Mr. Big) – James L. Dolan – Slunt – George Clinton – Marilyn Manson – Sir Bob Geldoff – The Explosion – Good Charlotte – Steve Vai – Project Object – Adam F. – Meldrum – Penny Royals – Ratdog – Crossfade – Paris Hilton – Stereophonics – Motorhead – Dave Navaro – Dropkick Murphys – Far From Finished – Rosenstolz – Paul Weller – Dweezil Zappa – Steve Vai – Terri Bozzio – Napoleon Murphy Brock – Prinz Ferfried von Hohenzollern – Roger Waters – Jeff Beck – Vinnie Colaiuta – OK GO – The Hard Lessons – Juliette Lewis & the Licks – Middleman – Nathan East – Herbie Hancock – Placebo – Kylie Minogue – Russel Crowe – Maroon 5 – Joe Jackson – Sonic Youth – Harry Connick Jr – Incubus- Zappa Plays Zappa – Kayne West – Devo – Justin Timberlake – The Coral – The Arctic Monkeys – Simon Cowell of American Idol – Sum41 – Pat Benetar – Steve Miller Band – Foreigner – John C. Reilly – Velvet Revolver – Kim Raver (of 24 & Lipstick Jungle) – Simple Plan – Angels and Airwaves – Arian Belew – The Hives – Kid Rock’s band – Slash – Peter Wolf – Jonas Brothers – Trans Siberian Orchestra – Sigur Ros – Greg Allman – Stevie Wonder ……to be continued…
Finally, a street named after Frank Zappa. I asked myself, “why, why Marzahn?” In case you didn’t know, Marzahn is on outskirts of Berlin and well, I would normally never go there. Sort of far from my house. I found out though, why Frank Zappa street was born in Marzahn.
The Orwo Haus is the reason. The Orwo Haus is the biggest recording studio in Europe and (some are sure) the whole world. 150 bands at a time can (and do) rehearse there daily. From the out side, it doesn’t look like much, no one would imagine what is going on inside. Well, you can read more about it HERE if you want.
< Harry
Napoleon (Napi) steals the show wherever he is. You gotta love Napi.
Around 3,000 people came from all over the place, on July 28th ( I know, this blog is long over due) to celebrate the unveiling of Frank Zappa street. Many bands played and headlining was Germany’s best Frank Zappa tribute band “Sheik Yerbouti” . Napoleon Murphy Brock joined them as their special guest. Nappi gets around 🙂
You can see many more pics from that event if you click HERE
I was asked to join them for their Encore, a hot version of “I am the slime”. I was freezing my tits off. When I left my flat, it was steaming hot, so I wore open toed shoes, a skirt and t-shirt and even after 18 years living in Berlin, you would think I would KNOW by now you have to literally drag a bag of clothes around with you as you never know how the weather will be/change.
I was literally shaking from being so cold that by the time I was asked to come on stage and read a letter from From Frank Zappa’s brother, Bobby to the crowd, my lips were purple. But, like a trooper, nothing keeps me from spreading the love and music of Frank Zappa. Nothing.
My good friend Tina (Debutante Daisy) and I. She knows the words to ALL Zappa songs
Tina Growhowski
^ Robyn & Dot
Another HUGE Frank Zappa fan ^
She flew all the way from the USA along with a tour run by a man named Scott.
They all came together for the street naming and the Zappanale.
Like I was saying, NOTHING prevents me from preaching Zappa music. In Germany I am often invited onto talk shows and written about, as they find my career fascinating (so do I ). And every single interview I have ever done, since 1997, I have mentioned Frank Zappa. He crowned me “Dr. Dot” long ago, so that is usually how his name is mentioned “How did you come up with that name?” they ask. Then I tell them about Frank, how my Dad is a massive Zappa fan and how much his music means to me. His music is the BEST (well, I am also insanely into the Beatles, so it’s a tie).
This is my new Zappa shirt ^ My pal Mark drew it and made it for me.
That man ^ in the above picture with me, is Thomas, the President of the Arf Society. What is the Arf Society you ask?
“Founded on the 20 March 1993, the Arf-Society is a
Frank Zappa fan club based in Northern Germany
with an international membership.”
It’s best you just click HERE to read all about them.
Wolfhard K. actually founded the Arf Society but Thomas is the pres. since a few years (Wolfhard is a busy man). Wolfhard and Thomas are extreme Zappa fans and have been putting on the annual Frank Zappa music fest which they call the Zappanale. This year was the 18th annual Zappanale and they invited me to help out a bit and to join Project Object on stage for some fun. So I accepted and I will try to find the words to explain how happy I am that I went.
What’s missing from this picture? Sadly it’s Ike WILLIS, that’s what. Where was Ike? His name was on the posters, the tickets, the press releases. A driver was sent to pick him up in Berlin, all the way from Bad Doberan, which is a 3 hour drive. He did not get off the plane as planned. In fact, he never even bothered to get in touch to tell them he missed his plane.
Why would Ike miss his plane? Because he is having an unfortunate struggle with cocaine addiction. I am not leaking any private information here. Everyone who is hip to the scene knows this. In fact, just about everyone who has met Ike in the last few years, has lent him $50. Ike owes EVERYONE $50. It’s rather ironic that Ike, who was Frank’s right hand man for YEARS and his best friend, ends up a crack addict. Frank was shrewdly against drugs (well, cigarettes are indeed a drug too, but anyways..).
In my opinion, drugs suck. I have never tried cocaine and can’t stand being around people who take it or even talk about it. BUT I can imagine why Ike does this drug. Not making excuses for him, but imagine your best friend dying, how horrible that must be and then on top of it, having to sing his songs almost daily to a crowd of his fans. Frank’s shoes are impossible to fill, and being on the front line, almost daily (well, nightly) singing the lyrics your best mate wrote must do your head in. It must be hell. Hell in paradise.
Making a living doing something you love is paradise, but in such a circumstance, it can be difficult. If you are sensitive (most artist are overly sensitive) then falling into such a trap, is understandable. Not good by all means, but I can see why it happens.
Fame, drugs, money, (“or was it the music?” ). I just hope Ike gets help and fast. He could end up dying, like other artists have done, thanks to that pesky, overwhelming, addiction People should plan a huge intervention and toss him into Rehab. SO MANY famous artist are having trouble now a days. Amy Winehouse is throwing her fucking career in the toilet too, just like Ike is. It’s so sad.
But anyways, with or without Ike, the Zappanale party went on.
The first night ( Thursday) everyone meets and greets in preparation for the Zappanale party following the next day.
I LOVE that sweatshirt I have on. I got it in 1988 in Boston. It’s held up pretty well. It says “Broadway the Hard way” on the sleeve.
So this was night 1. I was a tad tired, but knew I could handle the up coming 3 nights of partying. It was so fun to meet some of the Zappa-teers (huge Zappa fan organization) and see Nappi, Andre’ and the guys again..
Andre’, guitarist/vocalist and founder of Project Object with his sweet heart, Cheri. ^ (his OTHER sweetheart Robyn, pictured way up in this blog) put Andre in the hot seat. Juggling two ladies at the same time. Typical musician 🙂
Andre’ preaches Frank big time. He doesn’t earn jack shit touring with his band, he does it for the love of Frank’s music.
This is the list of all the bands that played at the Zappanale ^
My hotel ^ it is really strange. There is no one at the desk all night, you could have a massive party in the living room they have off to the side of the lobby and you could drag that party into your fucking hotel room and no one would care; completely the opposite of the uptight rules they have in Dublin where you can’t even have someone come up to your room to help you with your bags. You have to give it to the Germans, they are tolerant when it comes to fun.
The Park across from my hotel. I heard this is where the first ever Zappanale took place. But it got too big for it’s britches and moved to a huge field..
The town of Bad Doberan is clean, quaint, gorgeous and very tolerant of the annual Zappa festival.
< Dressed for my “Mary” skit
I finally got to meet my pen pal. Andrew ^ and I have been corresponding online for years. He runs a UK Zappa news/fan web site called “Idiot Bastard Son”. He has intervied many of Zappa’s alumni and I did one for him too a while ago. He was as funny in person as he is online. But then again, most Zappa fans are intelligent, special and funny, just like Frank’s music.
< Bass extraordinaire
Project Object were one guitarist and vocalist short ( Ike) but you would have never known it! They were fantastic!
Don Preston , the man in the purple velvet jacket on key boards, was one of the high lights of the whole Zappanale. He plays with Project Object on tour most of the time, but is busy with many solo projects. I am sure he is over 70 as he is one of the original members of the Mothers of Invention.
Project Object doing their thing ^
One of the few females at the festival was serving beer. I brought that plastic urinal with me, thinking they may not have anything to throw water on me when I play Mary. I got this urinal in a bar in Berlin called Cafe’ Klo (Klo is a nick name for Toilet in German). Everyone drinks out of these urinals in that bar and you can buy them as well. I don’t drink beer, but they do hold a lot of beer, so I made good use of it and kept my pals well watered with all of those unwanted beer tickets I was given..
This is Andrew’s pal Ian ^ Andrew wore this ^ shirt, thinking Ike would be there.
Andre’ is a master on guitar ^
This is not the first time I have played “Mary” on stage with Project Object. I like participating anyway I can. I asked them to learn “Valley Girl” so I can sing that with them next time our paths cross.
Here are the lyrics to the song “Fembot in a Wet T-shirt” in case you are one of those people who don’t know the album Joe’s Garage by Frank Zappa..
Act I
SCENE FIVE
THE WET T-SHIRT CONTEST
After a few weeks on the bus, being porked by
Toad-O’s road crew, and being too exhausted to do
their laundry on a regular basis, MARY is dumped in Miami.
With no money (and no other famous rock groups due into
the area for at least three weeks), she tries to pick up a few bucks
by entering the Wet T-Shirt contest at The Brasserie…
IKE:
Looks to me like something funny
Is going on around here
People laughin’ ‘n’ dancin’ ‘n’ payin’
Entirely too much for their beer
And they all think they are
Clean outa-site
And they’re ready to party
“Cause the sign outside says it’s WET T-SHIRT NITE
‘N’ they all crave some Hot delight
Well the girls are excited
Because in a minute
They’re gonna get wet
‘N’ the boys are delighted
Because all the titties
Will get ’em upset
‘N’ they all think they are Reety-awright
‘N’ they’re ready to boogie
‘Cause the sign outside says it’s WET T-SHIRT NITE
‘N’ they all crave some Pink delight
When the water gets on’em
Their ninnies get rigid
‘N’ look pretty bold
It’s a common reaction
That makes an attraction
Whenever it’s cold
‘N’all of the fellas
They wish they could bite
On the cute little nuggets
The local girls are showin’ off tonite
You know I think it serves ’em right
You know I think it serves ’em right
You know I think it serves ’em right
You know I think it serves ’em right
And it’s WET T-SHIRT TIME AGAIN
I know you want someone to show you some tit!
BIG ONES! WET ONES! BIG WET ONES!
At this point, FATHER RILEY (who had been recently de-frocked
for not meeting his quota, and has grown his hair out and
bought a groovy sport coot and moved to Miami and changed
his name to BUDDY JONES) steps onto the crowded bandstand
in his exciting new role as a WET T-SHIRT CONTEST EMCEE…
BUDDY JONES:
Ah, thanks, IKE…
Yes, it’s WET T-SHIRT TIME AGAIN
Here at The Brasserie… Home of THE TITS… huh huh…
And it’s the charming Mary from Canoga Park
Up next in her bid for the semi-finals…
Hi,Mary…howya doin?
Having been fucked senseless by the boys in the crew, MARY does
not recognize the former religious personage from her nights in the
rectory basement during which she acquired her basic manual skills…
confounded by his sport coat, she replies…
MARY: Hi!
Realizing that she no longer recognizes him… or even appreciates
the patient religious training he had given her in the past, BUDDY JONES,
like a true WET T-SHIRT EMCEE type person, proceeds to say various
stupid things to waste time, making the contest itself take longer, thereby
giving the mongoloids squatting on the dance floor an opportunity to buy
more exciting beverages. . . liquid products that will expand their
consciousnesses to the point whereby they might more fully enjoy the ambiance
of Miami By Night…
BUDDY JONES:
Where ya from?
MARY:
Ah, the bus…
BUDDY JONES:
Which one?
MARY:
You know…the last tour…
You know…
Leather
BUDDY JONES:
Oh.. .you were the girl that was stuck to seat 38 on Phydeaux III…
why don’t you get in position now and take a deep breath, because
this water is very, very cold, but it’s goin’ to be so stimulating. And
Mary’s the kind of Red-Blooded American Girl who’ll do anything…
MARY:
Anything…
BUDDY JONES:
I said anything… for fifty bucks
That’s right!
MARY:
I really need the fifty bucks you know I gotta get home!
BUDDY JONES:
Yeh, I know, your father is waiting for you in the tool shed… that’s right,you
heard right… our big prize tonite is fifty American Dollars to the girl with
the most exciting mammalian protruberances…
MARY: Here I am!
BUDDY JONES: …
as viewed through a thoroughly soaked, stupid looking white sort of male
person’s conservative kind of middle-of-the-road COTTON UNDER-GARMENT!
Whoopee! And here comes THE WATER!
MARY:
EEEK!
BUDDY JONES:
No, you’d squeak more if the water got on you …sounds like you just got an
ice pick in the forehead… AND HERE COMES THE ICE PICK IN THE FOREHEAD…
a million laughs, Mary! Anyway; good golly, what a mess…she’s totally soaked..
totally committed to the fifty bucks.. .That’s it just step into the spotlight.. let the guys
get a good look at ya honey!
MARY:
Here I am!
BUDDY JONES:
Whaddya say, fellas?
Nice setta jugs?
Now Mary, how’s about shakin’ it around a little…
BUDDY JONES:
Oh my goodness, look at her go!
MARY:
Oooh! I’m dancing!
I’m dancing!
BUDDY JONES:
Ain’t this what living is really all about!
Here’s your fifty bucks, Mary…
MARY:
Oh great! Now I can go home!
BUDDY JONES:
Home is where the heart is.
MARY: “On the bus!”
That water was fucking freezing, so the look of shock/horror is authentic. heh heh.
“ Oh great! Now I can go home!”
“with leather?”
The headliners of the whole Zappanale ^.
I haven’t seen Chad since 1988!! He is so shy, so soft spoken. SO SWEET!!! His whole band is sweet in fact. I loved hanging out with these guys. They played an all instrumental set. No Zappa tunes at all, although at certain points you could hear a tad of a Zappa riff, like they were teasing us. They were brilliant. I suppose everyone was expecting them to whip out at least one Zappa tune, but they didn’t.
Perhaps Chat wants to stay on Dweezil and Gail’s good side. At least now they can’t bitch at them for playing any Zappa music!
Oooh they sounded like butter. Lovely! x
^ you can see from his smile how sweet and genuine he is
Eric Slick ^ plays drums with Project Object. He is a genius (started playing drums at age 2 🙂
His Mom, Robin Slick, is a famous writer. Check out her blog HERE
The English band, Monty and the Butchers ^ were soooooo fun to hang out with. A million laughs indeed.
Jorg, the film director, who happens to be holding the mic, films each Zappanale. They make a dvd of each Zappanale. They interviewed me for the dvd. I was lively as usual.
I was lacking sleep, which I really really need right now, as I am literally running on fumes. My tonsils are beyond infected and I was told a year ago they have to be removed but I never find the time, so I have been living on antibiotics and feeling like shit for about two years. I know, it’s stupid. A vicious cycle, but I just never find the time. So if I get less than like 7 hours of sleep, I feel dizzy, sore throat, all that wimpy shit. I was devastated when I was told I had to be up and ready for an interview on stage Saturday at noon. I know this sounds like a diva talking but it’s not. I am just a night person and seldom fall asleep before 7am. Hard habit to break at such short notice 🙂
Jim Cohen, who has been the host for a few years at the Zappanale, was to interview me Saturday at noon. He does a representation each year on the Saturday of the Zappanale (the Zappanale always takes place in the first week of every August fyi) . He interviews guests and talks in great detail about Frank Zappa. He is a walking encyclopedia of Frank Zappa trivia/facts/info.
I was there, on time, and went through with the interview. I did most of it in German as it takes place in Germany, but said somethings in English too for the English speaking audience. What I am getting at, is this weekend is a marathon. You won’t be resting, you will be ON the whole time, partying, talking, laughing, dancing and by the end of the weekend, you won’t have a voice anymore. I swear I am still hoarse from the festival and it was a few weeks ago. Found that out the hard way last night at karaoke.
Eric Svalgård ^
The other Eric of Project Object and I signing the symbol for the Arf Society.
Monty and the Butchers hamin’ it up during the grand finale’ ^
The crowd (above) and the sound men ( are nice guys, but have to work while everyone else is raising hell, hence the glum faces)
Chad and Andre’ ^
Don and I discussing his amazing threads his wife sews for him. What a sweet heart! ^
Christian ^ was my driver for the whole festival. His Father Wolfhard is the founder of the whole Zappanale. The Arf Society was obviously trying extra hard to please me 🙂
Musician soup ^ …………. backstage at the Zappanale was heaven on earth
Hasi ^ a Zappateers member, from Austria and I in the Zappateer tent. This tent is out in the camping area at the Zappanale festival. Everyone in the camping area pretty much parties straight through, with no sleep, from Thursday to Monday morning. It is a non-stop Zappa themed party. The Zappateers tent is the center of it all. I was welcomed with open arms and even knew a few of the people hanging out in the tent.. It was super fun, but I had to hang backstage most of the time, as they had tiny tasks for me to do.
What are the Zappateers? ” The Zappateers are dedicated collectors of Zappa live shows.”
It’s best to click HERE to read more about the Zappateers..
These two lovely gals ^ know every word to every Zappa song and I love them. They were a fixture in the Zappateers tent and later on stage for the Grand finale too. They are seriously dedicated Zappa fans.
Sunday when I woke up, I thought: I am too tired to go to the Zappanale grounds again. I thought I would just sleep all day and hide until my ride took me back to Berlin. WRONG ANSWER. Thomas, the president of the Arf Society called and said “where are you hiding!?? We need you on stage at 9pm!” Eh? I thought my work was done. Guess not. So I dragged my ass out of bed, well, off the floor as I always sleep on the floor in hotels, as I am a walking sleeping disorder.
Painted my face a bit and tried to get motivated for yet another night of partying. I am only used to going out like once a week, sometimes once a month. Contrary to popular belief, I don’t go out much at all. I am a hermit. It looks like I go out a lot because I blog about it every time I go out. I can only handle two drinks and hate smoking so I am a light weight and need a day to recover when I party (I have always been that way, so don’t laugh to yourself as you say “it’s called getting old” under your breath). I have always been a light weight. sigh. ANYHOW, where the hell was I?
Oh yes, my lovely driver came and basically had to pry me out of my room as I was really dragging my ass by Sunday. But like magic, once I set foot on the Zappanale grounds, I woke up like a freshly watered flower.
So, I was wondering, what was my chore of the day? Why was I needed on stage at 9pm? Another Wet T-shirt thingy? A massage for Chad? Was I entered into the Zappa trivia game without my knowledge?
Napi and Um, I know he works for the Zappanale, I think he is the director of transportation but don’t quote me on that, but at any rate, that is Napi posing with a man I think may be Hendrik. (Lets play “name that German!”)
Chad & Andre’ ^
Kurz, Italian Frank Zappa fan and musician (he let me draw that stache on his face 🙂
I was attacked by a sharpie pen ^
Naturally after 3 nights of camping, the Zappanale guests, artist, campers and workers started to smell a bit. I mean, it is hot, humid, dusty.. everyone is sweating and drinking.. you get the picture. I had a close wiff of Matthews (bassist/vocalist/founder of Monty and the Butchers) underarm. Me likey. I LOVE the smell of a man’s sweat. Fuck deo and perfume and show gels. I want to smell the MAN, not the fucking brand. Nothing I hate more than a man wearing perfume, cologne, aftershave, deo etc. I want to smell the truth baby!
Well, it’s only fair… ^
Sunday night, we were ALL TOAST. I couldn’t believe that Monty and the Butchers hadn’t seen the Zappa statue of Bad Doberan yet!
The drivers brought us there and we had a little photo shoot. The one with the glasses (passed out) is Joe. he plays horns some times for Project Object. What a laugh that night was!
Me posing with the Zappa statue. There was a LOT of controversy surrounding the statue. Gail Zappa didn’t approve it and is still not happy about it. The Arf Society had to fight tooth and nail to convince the town of bad Doberan to even allow the statue to be erected there. All the drama!! It’s so sad how everyone behaves after an icon dies (James Brown, Zappa, Elvis, John Lennon, etc).I hope to fuck the dead idols are looking down, watching the behavior, keeping tabs….
I want to close this now and mention once more, how AMAZING the Zappanale was. I will be there for sure next year. This festival has been going on 18 years, and I hope it keeps going on for many more years. It has a special vibe to it, so much love for Frank, so many cool people, so much fun!!!!!!!!!!! The area is amazing too, it’s magical, in fact I couldn’t think of a better place to have such a wonderful meeting of minds. Thank you Arf Society for the lovely time, I will never forget it.
x
ps. If you haven’t seen them yet, I made 3 videos (well, one long one, broken up into 3 bits) of my Zappanale experience.
Just a preview of one of the upcoming massive blogs. I was at the unveiling of the one and only Frank Zappa street tonight (well, last night in Berlin). Sheil Yerbouti, a Zappa tribute band headlined and the very famous and talented Zappa alumni, Napi (above ^) joined the band. He plays with many Zappa tribute bands and he always steals the show 😉
I read an open letter from Bobby Zappa to the fans which gave his blessings for the Zappa street ceremony. I also joined Sheik Yerbouti and sang “I am the slime” with them. Much fun. I will finish this blog in a few days, I still have to do my Dublin blog. I have loads of pics to crop and upload and all that writing too.. and I have to get ready and pack for the upcoming, 18th annual Frank Zappa fest called Zappanale. Battling a lung infection again, wondering if Steve Vai passed that flu onto me accidentally in Dublin, if so, I would have to say I have the Steve Vai-rus. heh heh.
read this, you won’t believe it. As I know Ed Mann got a letter too, I’m waiting for it.
Indeed, she hates the fans, she hates Frank, paranoia took control like with Wild Man Fischer.
I got Eugene’s permission to make it open, I can’t post at zappa.com.
See you soon!
Thomas”
Hello Arfers
I am with Jimmy Carl Black at his home, we play this weekend at Schipoorst (Faust) festival near Hamburg.
Jimmy had told me about this stupid situation with Gail Zappa. We just had our own trouble, she insisted two Zappa pieces be removed from the new Jack and Jim CD coming on the Boxholder label in USA: fine versions of Mom and Dad and Willie the Pimp which I no doubt FZ himself would have appreciated because of the spirit of adventure and excellent quality banjo and guitar playing.
In doing this, she violates my understanding of the American copyright law, specifically the compulsory mechanical liscense that cover artists must apply for and also MUST be granted by the publisher once the composer has released a recording of the song.
Although I know no exception to this law, Gail Zappa will not allow her lawyer to communicate with me, all I want is an explanation of why she is allowed to violate this law.
You may be amused, although I am not sure (??) that in our correspondence she told me the Mothers of Invention as we know them do not even play on We’re Only In It For the Money, only four mysterious musicians who Frank told her about but she will not reveal who they are.
The reason the Mothers are pictured on the album was pressure from the record company, a marketing ploy.
Gail, you see, wants me to believe that her husband was such a patsy that he would do whatever the record company says. Meanwhile, we wonder, who played on the record, then? A young Elton John? Neil Diamond?
The Monkees?
Meanwhile, I wish you the best of patience with this problematic human being.
cheers
Name withheld to avoid more shit from Gail.
please note:
ZAPPANALE#18
02.-05.08.2007
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July 23, 2007 Ridgewood, New Jersey USA This is an open letter to Thomas Dippel, President of the ARF Society and co.organizer of the annual Zappanale festival and to all Frank Zappa fans on the occasion of the street naming event in Berlin on July 28, 2007: Dear Thomas and all Frank Zappa fans everywhere: I am writing this letter on behalf of Frank’s original remaining family members, our brother Carl and our sisters Candy and Ann to show our support and deepest gratitude for the special honor that the ORWOhaus musician’s collective have arranged in Frank’s memory. We are genuinely touched and extraordinarily pleased that the world famous city of Berlin has agreed to permit the street renaming in our brother’s honor on July 28th. We are thrilled to know that there will be a street in the Marzahn district of what was once East Berlin that will be formally dedicated as “Frank-Zappa-strasse”. This is an honor we humbly share in his memory and we extend our heartfelt thanks to everyone who made this event possible. When I first heard about this event I remember reading the comments that Andreas Otto, spokesperson for ORWOhaus, made about Frank to explain how his organization made the decision to arrange for this honor. He said that: “Frank Zappa was one of the best all-around musicians in the world; (he was) a guitarist, composer, and band-leader. He was celebrated for his uncompromising pursuit of musical exploration and excellence, and also for his courage using his music and lyrics to make society see its faults and hypocrisies. He didn’t do it just for media attention; it was part of his highly creative and unbending character. He stood up to his own government against politically -motivated censorship – he testified with great intelligence in the US Congress, and he refused to hold back his own outrageous sense of humor. We of ORWOhaus had our own battles trying to save an unused building and turn it into an active music center, and we decided that Zappa was a great example of how a musician can have an influence so far beyond the notes on a page. We hope Frank would be proud to have his name as an address for so many musicians.” I know that I can speak for my brother and sisters when I say that Mr. Otto’s comments have captured the essence of our Frank’s unique talent and motivation and that I am absolutely certain that he would be very proud to have his name as an address for so many musicians. And no, he didn’t do it just for media attention , or even for the money. He did it because he had the integrity and strength of purpose that those who knew and loved his music looked up to. Those character traits served us, myself included, as examples of how to deal with the mean spirited, untalented and money-hungry people in this world who use threats and intimidation to get their way. And I can think of no better way to keep Frank’s legacy alive and out of the reach of anyone who would demean his memory for profit than to let the world know of this special honor. Our very best wishes and deepest gratitude to the ORWOhaus collective for their kindness and generosity in connection with the street renaming of Frank-Zappa-strasse. Sincerely, Bobby Zappa
Tonight was a busy night. I just wanted to chill but I helped Jasmine get ready for her prom -she wore a cute hippie looking wine colored dress that hung above the knees and she rejected the sueded flip flops I bought her, instead, she wanted to go barefoot. Her dread locks were tied up and some of her hair stayed down, you know, half up, half down, like Angelina Jolie always wears hers. I guess this hippie attitude comes from me seeing the Grateful Dead about 50 times while I was pregnant with her.
I am happy she is a rock chick; I'm not complaining, I just wish she would have worn shoes and maybe let me buy her a dress. The other kids and parents must think "That Dr. Dot must spend all her money on rock and roll t-shirts and globe trotting as Jasmine wears all these hippie rags and converse high tops that have more holes in them then the streets of Blackburn!" But that's not true. Jasmine is not a consumer. She loathes getting presents and being given money etc. Very practical and frugal. Like me. I do love me a new lap top and my iPod though 🙂
ANYWAYS, after that hectic whirlwind, I went home and massaged Joe Jackson (who lives in Berlin now, and is recording his new album) from 11pm until 1am when my phone rang. Kanye West was in Berlin (on a promo tour) and wanted a massage. I could have sent one of my assistants, but I was curious to meet this man that Perez Hilton and the press always talk about. They usually mention this "He stormed out of an award ceremony, angry, because his video didn't win the Video of the Year award!".
They scathe him and I wanted to see if he was really like they described. In fact, I have never even heard his music, the only reason I knew of him was because of this nasty rumor. That and I know he did a song with Jamie Foxx, who I LOVE since seeing (and buying) the film RAY.
I was expecting a WHOLE lotta attitude. I got NONE. I was lead to his room and was kept waiting for a few minutes, along with his assistant. He opened the door and I yapped "Avon Calling!". heh heh. His room smelt like he had been burning a stack of rubber tires! He was holding what was left of some plug adapter, which was now half black from the flames and melted. LMFAO!!!!!!!!
Apparently the hotel gave him a plug adapter and what he needed was an electricity converter, like a mini transformer or so. It was their fault, not his. Thank God it didn't fry his lap top! Anyways, we got that sorted, I told the front desk in German to sort it out. I massaged him for about 2 hours and the music he chose to play from his lap top was mostly Maroon 5, then later, Modest Mouse. He said he is friends with Adam, the singer of Maroon 5 (I told him he was a client of mine too) and that they did a song together. I never head much Maroon 5 up until tonight. I only knew the two popular tunes "She will be loved" and "This love has taken it's toll", you know those catchy tunes..
Anyways, then we heard Modest Mouse, who he said is one of his favorites. I told him how I met Modest Mouse one night at one of my karaoke hang outs in NYC: Cassidys Pub, W 55th street. They have karaoke every Friday night (no they didn't pay me to write this). Modest Mouse was in there, acting like wankers. Showing off, hogging the mic, being really obnoxious and the singer was snotty to me and my friends. Once we said "aren't you Modest Mouse?" then suddenly they were all sweet and polite and they bounced right after that. As in, "oh shit, we can't act like cunts anymore, they know who we are". Whatever. The band is tight, but have a listen, the singer sucks ass. He must purposely sing out of tune and all over the place. Have a listen, then you will know what I mean. He's a pretentious twat.
Oh LORD I am totally off the subject now, which is HOW WONDERFUL Mr. West is! I asked him about this rumor, about him storming out of the award show in a sour grapes mood. He said "It's true" but then told me the whole story, the part the press so conveniently over looks when taking the piss out of him, you know, slagging him off. Ok, for you yanks, when they are being really mean and writing bad about him. (see why British/Irish slang is so useful? It gets to the point faster).
The missing part of the story is that his management and record company told him his video had won Video of the Year, and insisted that he attend this ceremony.
Here is what you find when you google this crap:
Kanye West, you may remember, stormed the stage at the MTV Europe Music Awards in Denmark last week, interrupting the winners' speech, claiming his video deserved the "Best Video" Award for "Touch the Sky," which lost to Justice vs. Simian's project "We Are Your Friends."
No fucking WONDER he was pissed off! He was lied to. He was told his video had won. So he was lead there under false pretenses. I just think it's unfair how the press leaves shit out. So you can't say they are lying, because they just leave shit out. Guys all over can relate with that method, as they use it all the time when explaining to their better half where they fuck they have been, etc.
I think he's cool. He was calm, friendly, intelligent, generous, very funny and had NO ego or attitude at all. I am not an ass kisser/brown noser, I am honest. The guy is wonderful. I know it's tabu to say, but he has an amazing ass. I told him too, so there.
x
ps. The only bad thing about me working until 4am and now still up online until 7:30 am, is I will be too tired to go and try to massage Lou Reed later today. Oh well, I think he is over rated anyways. Sweet Jane and take a walk on the wild side are not enough to cut into my 8 hours of sleep (Sour Grapes). Dragging my cranky ass into bed now.
It took me a while to make the video ^ so I hope you enjoy it.. It was filmed in May, during my stay in London. I went their mainly to meet up with my two gal pals, Christin and Nicole, who Steve Vai has sweetly nick-named the “Crazy Red Heads”.Next time I hope we have more time together and it would ROCK if we could meet up again in Dublin for example. We got along great…we have that special New England charm, that razor sharp smart ass sense of humor that not everyone understands. Wickedfuckinpissa for example.
Roy brought me out with his brother Erez and his Fiance’, Nikki (my friend too) to Tramps, alllegedly the BEST nightclub in London. The food was great but as the night grew later, the service grew worse. It’s obviously London’s version of Studio 54. Well, living off of the old fumes of such a scene. VIP wanna-be’s, wearing as little as possible, snorting this, snorting that. Posing at the bar, hoping to be seen/recognized .. all to the crappy tunes they dare call “music” . ew! Give me ROCK AND ROLL!
My pal Roy lives 5 minutes from Abbey Road, so we had fun stopping the traffic (just as all Beatles fans do) to take pictures, walking the same path the Beatles walked years ago.. It’s the busiest fucking street ever, even on a Sunday! It’s worth the hassle though 🙂
We joked constantly about the ridiculous prices in and around our hotel. $15 for a bowl of strawberries for example. Bite me!
Like I said in the video, we wanted to walk to this restaurant my pal Amir suggested, call the Red Pepper. Obviously we took a wrong turn on the yellow brick road and we weren’t in Kansas anymore, we were in the Projects (the Brits call them “Counsel Estates or Counsel Flats” as in, the Government is supporting this particular neighborhood. ANYWAYS, we were getting nervous as we could sense we were not in a safe area and were desperately trying to flag down a cab. Everytime one stopped, they seemed to be waiting for someone to get out, go make a dope deal and get back in. There were no available taxis. Boo fucking hoo.
I saw a cop car heading our way and ran out in the street to flag them down. I am sure it was our American accents that charmed them into not only telling us how to get to the restaurant, but they brought us there, gladly. One of the cops was actually pretty hot. The Red Pepper became our daily bread. We loved it so much, we ate there every fucking night. Best spinach I have ever had. I know there are loads of choices as far as places to eat go in London, but I am a creature of habit and when I love something, I want it all the time. Pun intended.
;;;
Sitting on the ground, chilling in front of the Palace. When the flag is flying, it means the Queen is “home”.
My my you have a big…weapon
I slipped my flyer into his boot. They aren’t allowed to move/flinch, etc. I told him to call me if he needed a massage. He did eventually text me, but I had already left. What a cutie 🙂
“Wild Horses couldn’t drag me away“
Mad men of London ^
My standard convenience store pose. I convinced that Moby look-a-like above to try it too.
The over worked door men of the Dorchester Hotel let me try on their hat
The lovely lane that lead to the Hyde Park Stables ^
My temporary Horse. She was a sweet heart..
Carrots get you everywhere 🙂
St.James park is breath taking ^
Another crazy Red Head ^
President Roosevelt and Winston Churchill didn’t mind me sitting on them for a while ^
Not to sound like a moaner, but London isn’t exciting as you may imagine. Everything is closed by 1am (most pubs close at 11pm!!). The shops close at 6pm, or the latest, 8pm. There is NO karaoke scene at ALL. I found one place, called Murphis and all of their songs have that accordion sound. As in, they aren’t allowed to have the real version, so they have a play school tone to them. Imagine Highway to Hell played on an Accordion. You couldn’t bring your own discs, like you can most places either. Their web site makes you think it’s gonna be a HUGE, two floored, happening place. Trust me, it’s not. HATED IT. In short, London, like the Stones say, is a “sleepy town”. Cute, expensive but a tad boring compared to Berlin and NYC.
“Evrywhere I hear the sound of marching, charging feet, boy
cause summers here and the time is right for fighting in the street, boy
But what can a poor boy do
Except to sing for a rock n roll band
cause in sleepy london town
Theres just no place for a street fighting man
No” The Rolling Stones
This ^ video took AGES to make. Still getting the hang of the ol’ Windows Movie Maker thingy
You could eat off the ground it’s so clean ^
I mentioned before (a few blogs ago) that I was heading to Monte Carlo. I finally found some time to make the blog.Kai Ebelthe famous German moderator suggested that RTL fly me down to Monte Carlo to massage a few of the Formula One drivers for a Travel Show he does. Once a year he does a huge special called “Formel Exclusiv” (it aired May 13th 2007 ).
Feeling grateful is an understatement. Ralf, the producer and the whole film crew were a blast to work with. Even Nico Rossberg, who was told by his Finnish manager not to remove his shirt for the shoot, was a great sport. He said “oh why not!” and ripped his shirt off. All of the girls who saw us filming and who saw it on TV were pleased with that decision.
Picture perfect, blah blah blah.
I heard the Royal family (Prince Albert and Princess Caroline etc) all live on the top of that giant hill/mountain ^
All in all I had a great time and I want to thank RTL for treating me so fine. I even got to stay an extra night and explore the place on my own. I visited the only Irish Pub there (I swear there are Irish Pubs everywhere) and I ate at a Mexican place instead of dining on Frog Legs like everyone else. I am now back in Berlin, enjoying Jasmine’s company and the hot weather. Susan Sarandon is filming SPEED RACER in Berlin and the management has my cards now so I am hoping I get to massage her. I have been a fan since the first time I saw the Rocky Horror Picture show ( I played Janet in a live production of it- you know when actors act it out while the film is playing at the same time) so I am really into her. Cross yer fingers for me will ya?
Heading back to NYC next month, gotta get my tonsils out finally. Sigh. Not looking forward to that. I won’t miss any time with Jasmine as I won’t leave until she leaves on her journey (going on a massive road trip with her friends in a VW bus). Cross fingers for her too while yer at it 🙂
Working on the London blog next. I need an ass massage from all this computer work 🙁
I just want to comment on all the Paris Bashing that’s been outshining the important news lately. I have met her, massaged her, hung out with her and I can confirm she is a darling. She is generous, sweet, polite and has a great sense of humor. It is so easy to judge people you haven’t met. So easy to bash celebrities for fun. I think the LA cops take things way to far when it comes to the stars. It’s almost as if they are so fucking bored and frustrated with their own mundane, crappy job that as soon as they get a chance to pull over a star, they use it as a claim to fame to throw the book at them ten fold. Mel Gibson was crucified and I still don’t believe he said those ignorant slurs. The cop knew what he was doing making that shit up. Same with Paris. If you know LA, you know that you HAVE to drive to get around and sure, Paris could afford a driver, but I know she likes to live as normal as possible; going out without body guards or a driver. She had a couple drinks, not many and she has to go to JAIL for 45 days now?
That German criminal who jumped me in January is still walking around free, never spent even an hour in court or jail, but the masses want Paris tarred and feathered for driving after a few drinks. I don’t even believe it was much. I know in the states the cops follow you around once you leave the parking lot of a bar/club and make you so nervous cause they are tailing you, that you end up doing something dumb like using the wrong blinker or something and then they jump on you. Give the girl a break, she is a sweet heart, really. She can’t change the fact that she was born into the lifestyle her parents had before she was even conceived. sigh. Everyone can get sympathy, but envy must be earned. Mitleid kriegt jeder, aber Neid muss man verdienen. Amen.
Today on MTV total request live (TRL) around 3:30 pm, see Adam Levine do his thing. Great guy!
I massaged him again last night here in NYC, then went out for some karaoke. Karaoke in NYC rules. I am having so much fun here, I hate to leave. I will return to Berlin in a few days to see my cutie pie, Jasmine. I have a massive blog, well, two massive blogs to write. I still haven't done my Monte Carlo and London blog. OMG, I will never get these done 🙁
I am pretty sure that I will be living back in NYC again by the Fall. I will still keep my flat in Berlin, but being back in the US with friends, family and loved ones is so nice. Just walking down the street is fun, everyone smiles, they are enjoying life, having fun, being friendly; it's so refreshing, I miss that! I will still have to visit Europe often, as I love it too. Wish I could split myself in two and live both places at the same time. I will be back again in NYC for just about the whole month of August, as I have to get my tonsils removed. Not looking forward to that. Hope it doesn't change my singing voice. I don't want to be a soprano or so. I need my AC/DC voice! 😀
x
Dr. Dot
"We can never know about the days to come But we think about them anyway, yay And I wonder if I'm really with you now Or just chasin' after some finer day
Anticipation, anticipation Is makin' me late Is keepin' me waitin'
And I tell you how easy it feels to be with you And how right your arms feel around me But I, I rehearsed those lines just late last night When I was thinkin' about how right tonight might be
Anticipation, anticipation Is makin' me late Is keepin' me waitin'
And tomorrow we might not be together I'm no prophet and I don't know nature's ways So I'll try and see into your eyes right now And stay right here 'cause these are the good old days
(These are the good old days) And stay right here 'cause these are the good old day"
‘ 
‘ 
< Dressed for my “Mary” skit 
(Lets play “name that German!”)
;;;
