Tag: blog

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Massage in Toronto (meet Dina )

My name is Dina and I was born and raised in Toronto, Canada. I spent most of my youth involved in competitive figure skating only to discover later on another true passion… snowboarding! My education as a massage therapist began early in my constant attempts to try and heal my own injuries.

I’ve been practicing the art of massage in a clinical setting for over ten wonderful years. To have the opportunity to help assist clients manage, reduce and heal painful injuries and/or discomfort has been a very liberating and educational experience.

I’m a huge fan and practitioner of Myofascial & Trigger Point massage, a deeper, corrective type of soft tissue release combined with specific on-table body stretches. On the other hand I am just as inclined to provide a lighter more rhythmical massage experience geared towards the stress-laden muscle tension created primarily by our taxed out nervous systems. I incorporate essential oils in most treatments drawing upon my 6 years as a Certified Clinical Aroma-therapist. In addition, I am a Registered Massage Therapist and certified in LaStone (hot stone) and Bamboo massage.

Email me if you want to book me (put DINA/TORONTO) in subject line: info@drdot.com

 

Posted on

Zappaween 2008 with Bogus Pomp (starring Ike Willis)

I have heard about ZAPPAWEEN the last couple years and never knew what it was exactly. I thought it was similar to the Zappanale but new. I skipped this past Zappanale (Frank Zappa tribute festival held every year for the past 19 years in Germany) due to a certain someone causing havoc for me. So I was itching to be around other Zappa fans and celebrate Frank and his music. I booked a flight and room and headed down to St. Petersburg, where ZAPPAWEEN is held. Robin and John (also avid Zappa freaks) met me there. I arrived a day early as they drove all the way from Atlanta (John flew to Atlanta from Chicago). I am NOT into road trips anymore (did enough of those following the Grateful Dead around for a few years back in the 80's ). 

 

I stayed at the Days Inn which I found online, not having a CLUE as to how that area is set up. I just wanted something close to the venue where ZAPPAWEEN takes place. Now you would think, having such an event, that happens once a year, that it would be bigger, you know, with a few Zappa tribute bands and perhaps tips on Bogus Pomps web site (they are the band that puts on ZAPPAWEEN every year) for Zappa fans who come to the area just for this event. But no. In fact, even up to show day (Nov 1st) their web site still didn't even have info on THIS YEARS Zappaween on it (I guess they are so busy they didn't get to it). I thought this event was a couple years old. But NO, it has been going on for FOURTEEN YEARS already. This surprised me as Robin, John and I were there a couple days early, HOPING to meet other Zappa fans and hang out with them, you know? BUT NO. NOTHING. 

 

I called a Zappa fan I know from Tampa which is rather close. I don't know him well, just an online Zappa buddy. I asked him "where do the Zappa fans meet down here?". He snapped at me "This is NOT ZAPPANALE DOT! This is ZAPPAWEEN and we don't meet up, it's just that one show and that is it!!". He was so snippy about it, Robin, John and I sat there in the cheesiest fucking bar ever with our jaws dropped at his response. Not just the tone (he continued to say "You should all be in bed, like I am, FUCKING!"). Oh, ok, whatever. So, let me get this straight. Zappa fans come from all over the world (one girl came all the way from Germany but we didn't meet her until the show started), yet no one organised a meeting point or pre-Zappaween party? Why? What the fuck. 

 

Let me try to explain to you how incredibly BORING St. Petersburg and Treasure Island (the actual beach area) IS. There are only THREE BARS on Treasure Island (all SUPER SMOKY) and walking into them is like walking back in time, and not a good time either. After hearing a few stories from "locals" we found out time seems to STOP when you escape to this area. No one was FROM that area, they are all from NJ, Chicago, Boston, etc, people who seemed to have ran away from the cold and their mundane busy lives. One waitress, who felt the need to tell us about all of her past husbands and addictions, was from NJ and has been there for 15 years. Her hair, clothes, make up and lingo that spat out of her pie hole were all set in that time, styled like life was 15 years ago. It reminded me of watching the Berlin wall come down November 9th, 1989 in Berlin. I watched the people come through the wall, dressed so old fashioned, as they didn't know any better. This was the same vibe. The music, hair, clothes, everything. It was so strange! We were all gob smacked. We just could NOT get over this time warp. Fucking BIZARRE.

 

Anyways, I still can't get over the fact, that after 14 years, there is no "where to go before and after Zappaween to meet other Zappa fans in St. Petersburg" web site or at least a tiny section on the Bogus Pomp web site "Zappaween Tips/stuff to do before/after". I guess I just am the type to see potential in things and wonder why no one else does. What harm could it do to have a pre-Zappaween party to get all excited for the show? Also, there is only ONE band at the Zappaween. One band, one show. So the whole Zappaween lasts about three hours. This would be worth the trip if you lived in the area. 

Anyways, the hotel I stayed in was frowned upon by the rental car dealer. They asked me where I was staying, I told them and they all stopped talking. They told me NOT to go out a lone at night and "it's very dangerous" in that area. DAM, you can never tell when booking online. Apart from the pubic hairs on my sheets left from last guest and half full can of coke left in fridge, it was ok. Vama, the manager (in the pictures above and below) treated me like a queen when she found out I do massages. I massaged her for free and she let me get away with everything. Front row parking, etc. The room only cost $50 a night, so I guess you can deal with some random short and curlies in your sheets ( I slept with jogging pants and long sleeved shirt on to avoid touching sheets). She even upgraded me after the first night to a suite and that was nicer. The maid was the problem. She weighed about 400 pounds, always had a cigarette in one hand and did NOT want to work. 

 

 

Vama ^ and I bonding 

I was so fucking shattered when I landed in St. Petersburg as I literally had TWO hours of sleep the "night" before. I was up until ten am, slept til noon (two full power hours) and then had to rush to airport. Rented a car and could barely drive I was so tired. On my way to hotel, I saw a Thai restaurant and stopped in to eat. It was PERFECT. "Thai Orchid" is the place to eat in St. Petersburg if you like Thai. I even brought Robin and John there the next night (I'm a creature of habit). After dinner, I was so tired I could barely see, but  instead of crashing when I got into the seedy room, I went out for a walk in the danger zone.I tucked my hair up under my hat and wore unattractive baggy clothes and headed out to stretch my legs. I was saddened to witness the poverty around me. I thought THIS is America? Sidewalks and streets haven't been repaired in years, in fact, bushes and weeds were growing out of all the cracks. 

Shop after shop, fast food joint after fast food joint were closed down, overgrown with bushes and trees. You could smell how desperate people have become in this area. The nasty hotels all along the road were housing for many family's. I could tell the people lived there, that they were not just passing through. Some places boasted "$33 per night or $150 per week" and of course they all offered an hourly rate (lots of ratty looking hookers lurking about outside of each hotel). HOWEVER, every few blocks was a brand spanking new, sparkling clean CVS or Walgreens. Oh LORD they are doing so well. Why? Because Pharmacy's will always do well, because the Government wants us all hooked on prescription drugs. The commercials never stop. I went into several of these CVS's and Walgreens on my nightly walks, mainly to buy Reese's peanut butter cups , but also because they are open 24/7 and safe. What a massive contrast: CVS every few blocks, obviously thriving, with a Walgreens directly across the street from each one, surrounded by obvious poverty. Tsk tsk. It makes me ill. 

One night after our boring fucking trek into the local bars (which turned UP the crappy music on the juke box and turned the Zappa and Hendrix we picked out down super low), Robin, John and I walked together to CVS (I think the peace pipe made us extra giddy) and we had a fucking blast in CVS. The woman behind the counter got to know me by now and I loved making her laugh out loud every night. This night, I told her I would give her $100 – or any other store employee if they could tell me the MEANING of what "CVS" actually stands for. No one in the whole freakin place knew what it meant. ROBIN DOES! How fucking random is that!! Robin KNEW!! It means "chorionic villi sampling" omfg. It's a test that is done that is done to check for birth defects. WOT???? Robin works in a woman's help center. LMFAO!!!!!! So, if you want to fuck with CVS employees, go and ask them what CVS stands for. 

 

 One advantage of me arriving so tired, is I went to bed at midnight and got up at TEN AM. I had time audition a new Dot Bot. Alison came to my hotel and massaged me by the pool side. On her massage table, out in the sun. It was lovely. I hired her, she is amazing. You will see her online very soon. She just massaged Jason Mraz for us yesterday. 

I did manage to get to the beach during daylight hours (beach was ten minute drive from hotel). I jogged along the beach and watched the sun set. It was breath taking. Made me want to move there, but then again, those bars, those freaky locals and that time warp effect woke me right up. If I ever go there again, I will surely stay RIGHT on the beach, which costs twice as much but the hell, you only live once. If you're gonna do it, do it right. 

 

 

 ZAPPAWEEN has an annual costume contest and ^ John dressed as Vito Paulekas (freak?) posing here with Robin in front of the State Theater. 

   
 I just dressed as Mary, the crew slut (or did I?) I love my Jetson Boots.   Robin and I lovin' life. 

 

 Jerry Outlaw's girlfriend, Deborah,  did 

a great job dressing up as Amy Winehouse

 

 

Zappa fan Dave Black  dressed "Potato headed Bobby" , posed with his cutie pie girl friend and Robin. 

 

 

Ike was the star of the show for sure. Everyone was scared he wouldn't show or whatever, like with the Zappanale (he missed the plane) but he was there, in full force and nailed it. He is a jolly soul. Smart as whip too, don't let that goofy grin fool ya. 

 "Not by the hairs of my chinny-chin-chin"

 Dan Campbell , violinist, fiddler and guitarist, was one of my favorite

parts of the show. At one point he was fiddling so fast, I swear I saw 

smoke. I couldn't help but imagining him wanking; thinking how good he

must be at it. I asked him after and he assured me he is a pro. 


 

 The Bassist looks like an older version of one of my ex-boyfriends, also 

a bassist. He was on fire. Seriously. 

 

 

 

Jerry O. and Shane Blank bending those strings ^

 

 A view from side stage ^

Byron Hogan, Cello player and Pat Buffo ^ (even though Pat is sporting

pig tails and a dress, he is so lumber-jack manly, he can pull it off and 

still make the ladies, including me, swoon. 

 
   Shane Blank , guitar prodigy, age 14, jammed with Bogus Pomp and jaws hit the floor. 

 

 

Mr. Zappaween himself, Jerry Outlaw, founder of Bogus Pomp. When I got into the gig, Jerry was on stage, changing guitar strings on his guitar. The audience was just chilling to the house music (led zeppelin, janis joplin and many other classics) while Jerry was sweating his balls off to get done in time. You can tell he has his plate full but works all year long to pull off Zappaween. To say the band was TIGHT would be a severe understatement. In fact, between Bogus Pomp and Project Object, ZPZ hasn't a snow ball's chance in hell at recreating Frank Zappa's music the way it is supposed to be played, like these two bands; with passion. REAL passion. Not just "I need to do this to pay my bills cause my own band doesn't cut the mustard" – passion. 

 

Dressed as the "Spider of Destiny" (google it) won the contest and won the guitar. 

 

Billy the Mountain came in second place I think… I found it strange they

didn't invite the costumed freaks on stage for voting. They were just called

to the front row; which was lame as no one but the band could see and judge

them. 

 
   This Tomb Raider babe had the men in a "petulant frenzy"

 

 Guest vocalist, Pat Buffo ^ impressed me greatly. His rendition of 50/50 and Zombie Wolf gave me goose bumps. The mother fucker can SING. He has his own band called Rebel Pride . 

 

Acting out "Dirty Love" (the way your mama makes that nasty poodle chew) -see the white poodle near my rump?

 

 

Ok, during the show, I received an email on my crackberry from Jerry Ford one of Jimmy (rip) Carl Black's best friends. The email came around 11pm and it said that Jimmy Carl Black had just passed away in his sleep. My reaction was LOUD, shocking and undeniable. In other words, I couldn't have hidden this emotion. Robin and John simotaneously went "WHAT? What's going on!??" The music was so loud, I couldn't hear them nor then me, so I just passed my crackberry to them to read. We all flipped out with watery eyes. What a downer. We were in between heaven (amazing Zappa tribute band) and hell (hearing of Jimmy, original Mother of Invention) passing. 

Matt Koegler , fellow Zappa freak suggested keeping that news to myself, as not to bring everyone down, but I just had to tell Ike. I mean, wouldn't all the Zappa fans want to know as soon as possible so we could all send him loving thoughts? I waited until Ike had a break and went back stage and brought him out side to tell him and show him the email. The above picture was taken a few minutes after, when Robin came outside to help console him. Perhaps the tears in my eyes prevented me from focusing my camera properly or perhaps my camera has just gone to shit. Not sure. 


 
   Holy FUCK! Some people have a lot of free time. Looks amazing doesn't it???

 So Ike decided he would announce Jimmy's passing when he got back on stage. He went on stage, whispered it into Jerry's ear and then Jerry broke the bad news. But instead of bringing everyone down, Jerry said it in such a way and dedicated the rest of the show to Jimmy, that everyone celebrated his life, rather than being bummed out about death. At least Jimmy wasn't suffering from the torture of the cancer any longer. RIP Jimmy, my friend. At least no one can sue him any more for playing Frank Zappa's music. Pffft!

 

Can you BELIEVE how amazing these pumpkins are? The carving must have taken HOURS. There were two of them at the show and they looked even better when the lights were out. They glowed. They seemed surreal. 


 

I am dam proud of that picture. Great colors, mood, yes!

The two love birds were alone on stage after the show, showing love and I just asked them to pose. So sweet. Poor Jerry must need a whole year to recover from all the stress and energy it takes to put on Zappaween. I think some of his friends should help out a bit more, like with the web site, and lugging the equipment in and out as I saw him doing most of the work, but maybe he likes it that way. 

 

 Although the actual Zappaween/Bogus Pomp SHOW was fun, I have to admit I prefer Zappanale. There are 4 days of Zappa-packed fun, with Zappa fans from all over the world (total sausage fest) and the scenery is gorgeous too. Zappaween is three hours of fun. No comparison. Fourteen years of Zappaween and still no place to hang out before the show? wtf? You know I love comparisons. So lets just say, you have two amazing lovers. Both well equipped. Both can make you cum. But one fucks you for four days, a four day fuck fest, you know the kind, were you stink of sex for days in a row. The other, comes in, makes you cum really fast and leaves. Zappaween is the quickie; Zappanale will make you sore for a few days. Both are fun. It's a matter of taste and time I guess. 

Ike and John after the show. The mood was somber again after the smoke cleared and Jimmy's name came up again. There was mad love for Jimmy at the show that night. He will never be forgotten. Such a talented sweet heart. Missed by many many fans, friends and loved ones. 

 

Comment from Robin:

 

Dec 6, 2008 9:55 PM
great florida/zappaween blog…will add a story or two soon…like how i had NO VOICE…and that DINER we went to at 3am…what a trip that was!! omg…our dr. dot massages at the pubic hair motel…with the highest *mildew* rating!!LOL! although blurry, i like the shot of ike and me sitting outside after learning that JCB had died 🙁 your previous poster is right, for such heavy news it was great to be with you and john and ike and all the fans…RIP jimmy…RIP frank… peace and music…robin

Posted on

Jimi Hendrix Birthday Bash at BB Kings – what a blast that was

 

So after a lovely Spanksgiving Thursday, I dropped Jasmine off home and headed to BB Kings (42nd street) to the Jimi Hendrix 66th Birthday Bash to see my friend Lance Lopez do his thang. I get invited to so many shows to see friends play and hardly ever have time to go see them, but this time I went ( I am a HUGE Hendrix fan). First to go on stage was Jimi's REAL brother, Leon (same mom and dad). Sadly I missed his set due to typical NYC traffic hell. 

 

 

 

 

BUT I still got to hang out with Leon, who is very friendly and charming. I heard from the others he has only started playing guitar 5 years ago; perhaps that's why he went on first? I told him straight up "I would have been one of those ladies that fucked the hell out of your brother given the chance. His music turns me ON". I have to admit, the thought of procreating with Hendrix DNA did cross my mind, for  a sec.  Heh heh. 

 

 The Staff at the BB King are so friendly to me, I get VIP treatment when I show up and I don't even ask for it, but I'm like, "ok".. why not? I did insist on paying though ($50) to see the show, hey, musicians bust their BALLS doing what they do, and if I really want to see a band, I pay. I know how it feels, having my own band in Berlin (Bitchfest) when 200 people show up and half are on the guest list and you earn FUCK ALL after all the rehearsal room costs, flyers, PR etc.. 

 

Anyhow, I got a great seat and watched Lance in awe. I just about got off listening to him play Hendrix tunes, PERFECTLY. It was like Jimi came down and channeled himself through him. The voice, the guitar lics, omfg, I wanted to get up and dance my ass off, but everyone was seated and so head bobbing and though slapping was the norm. Lance got a standing ovation after EVERY SONG!!

 

The guy who came on after Lance, Frank Marino MUST have received the headlining slot out of habit, as he was sloppy (some said it's because he is in his mid 60's, but that never stops BB King when he plays) and at times it really sounded to me like the band skipped crucial beats which made it sound to me like a record skipping. He did an amazing job at the star spangled banner though, I must admit. BUT watching Lance Lopez play first and THEN having to endure Frank after was just like having an outrageously perfect shag and THEN having a lonesome wank after. No comparison. Not exaggerating here folks, Lance nailed it. PLUS, Lance only needed THREE in his band, as in, him plus two, just like Jimi, to do it right. Frank needed an extra guitar player. Yawn.

It was Heaven for Hendrix fans. sigh, purrrrrrrrrrrrrr. It has inspired me to hurry up and get that Hendrix tattoo I have been putting off for so long. I asked Jasmine to draw me a Hendrix head which I will have tatttooed on me, not sure where yet. Leon said he "REALLY wants to see it, in the flesh", once it's done 🙂

 

 

 

 

 

Do to the hurried blur called 'my life lately', I forgot my camera in the car and had to make due with my Crackberry camera. Hence the crappy quality pictures. sigh. 

 

 Lance just sent me a text message with his set list he played at BB Kings last night:

 

1. Midnight. 2. Hear my train .3. Gypsy eyes .4. One rainy wish .5. Izabella .6. Them changes .7. Voodoo Chile slight return

 

See Lance Lopez LIVE:

Nov 29 2008 9:00P
PORT 41 NEW YORK, New York
Dec 10 2008 5:00P
GUITAR CENTER (In-store clinic) SAN FRANCISCO, California
Dec 11 2008 9:00P
THE SWEETWATER STATION MILL VALLEY, California
Dec 13 2008 9:00P
COZY’S LOS ANGELES, California
Dec 14 2008 9:00P
BOOGALOO LOUNGE LOS ANGELES, California
Jan 10 2009 8:00P
CORNER CAFE EL DORADO, Arkansas

 

 

 

So I am all out of watch with the blogs, I still need to do the Italy blog from last spring, the Flogging Molly, Ac/dc and Project Object blog as well as the FLA trip/Zappaween blog. OMFG. I am living in Blog shame. Stay tuned.

x

Dr. Dot

Posted on

Ask Dr. Dot (November 2008)


Feel Free to ask me any question, I always change the names around, so know one will know your identity, except me. I answer all questions personally. You can find my columns on line, just google "Ask Dr. Dot". It also appears in Penthouse Forum every month as "Calling Dr. Dot".

x

Dr. Dot

 

 

Q.

My girlfriend and I broke up last Summer when she moved to Asia. But for the last year that we
 were living together we didn't have sex I started watching porn to satisfy myself. Now that I am
dating again, I seem to have a harder time staying stiff when I am with a woman. I don't have a
difficult time when I'm watching porn though. Obviously, I can get an erection. Am I addicted
 to porn, or have I just developed the beginnings of ED? What can I do to figure this out?
I just don't know what's normal anymore. I never had this problem in my life.
Softie Sal

 

A.
"ED"? Wtf does that stand for? Eating disorder? Exiguous Dick?
It could be your penis is rebelling. He is pissed the fuck off he lived with
a pussy for a year and didn't have any access at all, only your hand was there for him. Now he
 is showing YOU who's boss. Take control again and retrain him.  Your cock is spoiled by
your over tentative hand. No one can fuck you like you and porn if fun but it can make men lazy.
 There is no need for bringing your hand out to dinner, giving it compliments or foreplay.
Porn provides the scene and your hand provides the "pussy". Time to break up the monotony
 and prepare for real pussy. Cut back a bit on the porn and wank once a day
 instead of 4 times a day for example. It's hard for a normal girl to compete with a Double-Penetration-hungry
 porn star on her first date. Try to start all over again, getting excited over a date, her smell, glimpse of cleavage,
possibility of a first kiss, the anticipation, and the foreplay when it finally comes. Kind of like putting a fat
 kid on a diet, even though it's parents own a Haagen Daz ice cream shop. It must be done.

 

Q.
I am a randy young woman, with a slammin' sex life. What bothers me though is
how often I have to put the breaks on spicy make out sessions when it comes to
the penetration point. Most of the time, the men I make out with don't have condoms
but still want to fuck. Naturally I say no and they either are upset that I don't have
any on me or that I won't let them shag me without a condom. Why are men so
willing to dive into an unknown pussy without protection? Is it because I look
so innocent or are they just dumb? And is it our job as females to suddenly be
the condom machine?
Pissed off Patti

 

A.
They may be so willing to dive in without protection because
they’ve probably been lucky so far, not having experienced a STD
that turned their cock purple with red spots or having knocked up a girl
on a one night stand. These fearless, horny buggers who, thanks to
their raging hard on, aren't thinking at all. I’d be lying if I said protected sex feels
better than bareback but you have to protect yourself from Aids, STDs and pregnancy,
unless you’re in a long-term monogamous relationship.
A man expecting the lady to carry condoms is as arrogant as it is ignorant.
We don't own a cock, so we shouldn't have to tote rubbers around; they
don't own a pussy and shouldn't have to supply us with tampons. Next time
you get busy with a man who hasn’t any protection,
 take a walk to the corner shop together and make him buy condoms. This will
 teach him that you are a safe, responsible,
yet fun and eager. Great combo.

Q.
I’m 18, I’ve never had a proper girlfriend before although there’s
a girl in my life currently who I really want to date. I’m totally straight, there’s no
question about that and I love being a man. The thing is that I like dressing up in
women’s clothes. I don’t know what it is that  makes me do it but I can't help it.
 What makes it worse is the fact that they’re my sister’s clothes. I don’t feel anything
 sexual towards her at ALL.
I want to stop but whenever I try and resist the temptation, I fail. I always tell myself
'right you’re not going to dress up' then 5 minutes later I am admiring myself dressed up.
 Would any girl be completely scared off by this sort of thing if I tried to tell her about it?

Dressed up Dan

 

A.
You may as well just embrace your fetish now and get it over with, rather than struggling with it
for years, going to therapy which you don't need, blah blah blah. We ALL have our weird sides,
and I mean everyone. Young girls may not understand this habit of yours, but older women will.
Thing is, you shouldn't change for anyone. You like the feel and look of women's clothes on your
body and who can blame you? Our clothes look and feel sexier than men's clothes. Perhaps this
is your cue to take up a career in Fashion. Lots of straight men make ladies clothes and I know
quite a few straight men; some rock stars even, which love to cross dress in private. It's not a
a big deal, honest. There is no sense in hiding things from the girls you choose to date. Don't tell
them until you are sure you can trust them and you can even make it fun like when you are both
naked before/after sex, just get up and try her clothes on; it will surely make her giggle. Make her
try your clothes on as well. Don't sit them down for a serious chat about your habit, just slowly
weave it into things. I am sure they have strange habits they keep from you as well. Life would
be boring as fuck if we were all just plain, boring and straight laced. Be proud that you're different.

Q.
A lot of my exes, past lovers and current girlfriend wouldn't let me make them cum. Why is this?
I get them right to it and they stop me. Do or did they want us to cum together maybe?
 Or with my most recent ex, she was very shy. Maybe she was shy about cumming in front of me?
Honestly, their climax is  more important to me than my own and I wanted to know what you have
 to say about it.

Climax Carl


A.
It could be a control issue, afraid to lose control and hand it over to you. Maybe they can't let their hair down,
have fun and give into pleasure. Sometimes, women never find out HOW to cum. It's obviously not as easy
for girls to cum as it is for guys. Since everyone is different, the only way you will find out, is by asking each
girl you get in the sack. Just come right out
and ask them if it happens again. Say, ""Can you make yourself cum?” If she says "yes" then ask her to show
 you how she does it. Bed is no place to be shy or afraid to ask questions.

 

 

Q.
Hoping your advice will save my love life. I have always been the giver in my
relationship and now I am thinking of asking my woman to marry me. We have an outrageous sexy life and have been together for 2 years and we still make each other crazy in bed. I love her a lot but she has sometimes been unkind. She is demanding and no matter how much I give, it never seems to be enough. Her attitude does turn me on but I wonder if she will ever treat me a bit better, like if I ask for her hand in marriage. I would marry her but wonder if this will give away all my power?
Every time I pull away from her she tries to pull me back. I feel like
things have come to a head and its do or die. Should I pop the question? (I swear I treat her soooooo good.)

Whipped Woody

A.
Everyone is "unkind" now and then. If you think marriage
will change things, you need to get a grip. If you find yourself
pulling away from her, then marrying her is a stupid idea.
Marriage is not even necessary anymore. People do not
need a contract to love one another. A big party to celebrate
your love and commitment should satisfy everyone's need
to wear tacky dresses and receive presents from friends and
family, but why the contract? The very thing that people
think will make them feel like they've "sealed the deal" is the
same thing that leaves them craving for regular sex, which
seldom occurs in a marriage, hence the fact that most marriages
end in divorce anyways. If she is mean to you, grow some balls
and ask her why. If things don't improve, move on and find
a woman who loves a giver (there are plenty of them out there).

Q.

I am a 23 year old female, and was wondering if you had any suggestions as to
how to make "doggy style" feel better for me. For some reason, when my fiancé
and I try this, it is uncomfortable EVERYTIME. Sometimes painful, sometimes just
flat out UNCOMFORTABLE! I know He loves it, as he keeps asking me to do it, so we need to perfect this.

Any tips?! thanks!

Don’t-like-the-Doggy Daisy

A.
I am guessing your man has a long schlong. You can try it standing, and cross
your legs tight when he is in you, to be able to control how deep and hard he
prods you but squeezing his cock with your pussy (crossed legs make the grip
tighter). If you do it on the bed, tell him to go in you, and then carefully lie flat
On your stomach, with him in you, and again, close your legs together tightly
And cross your legs. He will love the tighter grip and you will love the fact
He isn't playing pool with your ovaries anymore. If it STILL hurts, try to keep
One hand on the base of his cock while he fucks you to control how deep he
Goes. If none of that works, stop doing it doggy style. Get on top of him and
squat on him so you can control the pressure. You may have a cyst or two on
your ovaries, which is very common. You can either have them removed or
start taking the pill, which pretty much makes them disappear.

 

 

Posted on

Gail Zappa stops Project Object show this Friday in Boston


"Due to Adelaide Gail Zappa and her incessant, worldwide legal attacks on fans honoring Frank Zappa's music, and attempts to negate his request (according to the Zappa hotline, Dec 1993) to "Play My Music", the Project/Object show for Fri 21 Nov 2008, at Bill's Bar in Boston, has been cancelled.

Stand by for further details on the threatening letters. All other shows, have proceeded fantastically or are proceeding as planned, since what we do is 100% legal under US law. It's sad that lawyers are being enriched every year by this useless letter-writing campaign (all clubs also get threat letters).

FYI – The band Ugly Radio Rebellion, who you'll remember was under attack for Dec. 2007 shows, just had to cancel all their Nov 2008 shows due to a couple of clubs' unfounded fears of Adelaide Gail Zappa suing them. Bogus Pomp in Florida also recently was attacked for celebrating this music. Artists in Germany also continue to be attacked. What a waste of good money that could be used to release more Zappa music……

We are not breaking any laws and we will continue to perform Frank Zappa music for you. And maybe even a little of the music of Mozart, Stravinsky, Gustav Holst, The Seeds ('Pushing Too Hard' used in 'Sy Borg'), Yes (1984 'bamboozled' solo section), The Beatles (medley played on 1988 Zappa tour), Richard Berry (Frank quoted "Louie Louie" DOZENS of times), Herbie Hancock (riffs quoted in 'Greggery Peccary'), Culture Club ('I'll tumble for ya'), The Doors ('The End', 'Light My Fire')..and on and on and on….

I am conducting research into where and when Frank Zappa got permission to perform, record or parodize ALL of these and many, many other various artists' music. Of course sometimes he sought permission, and when RECORDED and RELEASED, he certainly paid mechanical royalties. But certainly many times he didn't.

For a guy who has a LARGE part of his art based on USING THE MATERIAL OF OTHERS, his estate is strangely, hypocritically opposed to any one else doing the same!

Thank you
Andre Cholmondeley
Project/Object"

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STAIND in NYC

I am so fucking unbelievably behind with blogging, answering emails (I have over 1,000 unread emails now) and my fingers are KILLING me from too many massages. Last night (I am still up, it's 9am) I massaged the manager for Ac/Dc in NJ, then drove like a bat outta hell to NYC to massage STAINED and Papa Roach (old friends). They played at the Hammerstein Ballroom.. sounded good, what I heard of the show, but the highlight was hanging out with Stained front man Aaron on his bus while he talked business to many big wig record company folks and managers. 

He stopped the convo and says "This is Dr. Dot. Her massage team can NOT be beat. I have never had anything short of an AMAZING massage from everyone of her Dot Bots on the road!". They all asked for my flyer and seemed into his pitch. I LOVE that kind of PR, it can not be beat. Gene Simmons did it the other night too backstage at Ac/Dc. He announced to the dressing room "Dr. Dot gives the best massage in the world everybody, come get her business card!". OMG, Gene doing a commercial for my massage team. I thought I died and went to rock and roll heaven.

 

I have SO MANY FUCKING BLOGS to write I don't even know where to start. I have not even finished my ITALY Blog, started the Boston or Florida blog, Flogging Molly, Ac/Dc, The Answer, and the other night Project Object (with Ike Willis and Ed Mann at the BB King club- omfg, it was PERFECT, "the band was tight!"). Head is spinning I have so much to do, when will it slow down? Never I am guessing. I did have dinner with Jasmine the other night and massaged her feet in the restaurant as usual :). Man I love her. LOVE LOVE LOVE. 

 


 

 

is a DEEP TISSUE massage junkie ^

 
   

 

 

It was great to see Papa Roach again. Tobin (left) and Coy (right) have grown up a LOT since the last time I have seen them (2000 in Berlin). I beat Coby at table soccer really badly and he still remembers lol. BUT Eric Clapton beat me really badly, so you win some, you loose some. 

Look at the old picture of Coby and I, see how different he looks; I barely recognized him!

 
   You can see Tobin, ^ again on the left. He has changed a lot too

But then again, he must have though the same about me. ha ha. 

They have been on tour for 10 years straight. I hope they make it big. I am not a fan of the music, you KNOW I am a classic rock fan, but I like these guys personally and they deserve sucess for sweating it out on the road for so long. It is TOUGH on the road. Real tough.

Posted on

Need singers and musicians to perform EVERY Beatles song on Dec. 7th in NYC

http://forthebenefitofmrbuffet.blogspot.com/2008/11/we-need-singers-december-7th.html

 

 Click link to sign up ^

 



See you there 😉

Go here and look at this
http://forthebenefitofmrbuffet.blogspot.com/
I'm playing every original Beatles song (189 in total) in one day on ukulele,
At Spike Hill in Wiliamsburg, Brooklyn, Sunday, Dec 7, 2008, noon to midnight. I need Singers!
Here's the set list, Write back to me and claim your songs. We are doing them in alphabetical order and will confirm and hopefully rehearse with you in advance. You can bring a band or just let me accompany you on uke, the only provision being we play the song in the same key as The Beatles. i don't mind slowing down or speeding up but changing keys 189 times is just too much.

Across The Universe The Beatles 3:44
All I've Got To Do The Beatles
All My Loving The Beatles 2:12
All Together Now The Beatles 2:09
All You Need Is Love G The Beatles 3:48
And I Love Her The Beatles 2:31
And Your Bird Can Sing The Beatles 2:02
Another Girl Anytime At All The Beatles 2:13
Ask Me Why The Beatles 2:24
Baby You're A Rich Man C The Beatles 3:01
Baby's In Black The Beatles
Back in the USSR The Beatles 2:43
The Ballad Of John And Yoko
Because
Being For The Benefit Of Mr. Kite D-
Birthday
Blackbird The Beatles 2:18
Blue Jay Way C
Can't Buy Me Love The Beatles 2:15
Carry That Weight The Beatles 1:37
Come Together The Beatles
The Continuing Story of Bungalow Bill
A Day In The Life G The Beatles 5:34
Day Tripper The Beatles 2:48 Album
Dig A Pony The Beatles 3:55 Let it Be
Dig It The Beatles 0:50 Let It Be PM
Do You Want To Know A Secret
Doctor Robert The Beatles
Don't Bother Me The Beatles 2:26
Don't Let Me Down The Beatles 3:35
Don't Pass Me By The Beatles 3:50
Drive My Car The Beatles 2:28 1962-1967
Eight Days A Week The Beatles 2:48
Eleanor Rigby E- The Beatles 2:06
The End The Beatles 2:20 Abbey Road
Every Little Thing The Beatles 2:05
Everybody's Got Something To Hide Except Me and My Monkey
Fixing A Hole F The Beatles 2:37
Flying C 2:17
The Fool On The Hill
Magical Mystery Tour
For No One Aflat The Beatles
For You Blue The Beatles 2:56
From Me To You The Beatles 1:56
Get Back The Beatles 3:12
Getting Better C
Girl The Beatles 2:34 Rex M
Glass Onion The Beatles 2:18 Rex M
Golden Slumbers, Carry That Weight, The End
Good Day Sunshine B/A Rex M
Good Morning Good Morning A Rex M
Good Night The Beatles 3:12 Rex M
Got to Get You Into My LIfe G Rex M
Happiness Is A Warm Gun Rex M
A Hard Day's Night G Rex M
Hello Goodbye C The Beatles 3:30
Help! The Beatles 2:18
Helter Skelter The Beatles 4:30
Her Majesty D The Beatles 0:23 PM
Here Comes The Sun The Beatles 3:06
Here There And Everywhere G
Hey Bulldog The Beatles 3:14
Hey Jude The Beatles 7:03
Hold Me Tight The Beatles 2:33
Honey Pie The Beatles 2:40
I Am The Walrus A The Beatles 4:35
I Call Your Name The Beatles 2:05
I Me Mine The Beatles 2:26 Let It Be
I Need You The Beatles 2:31
I Saw Her Standing There The Beatles 2:55
I Should Have Known Better The Beatles 2:44
I Wanna Be Your Man The Beatles 1:59
I Wanna Hold Your Hand
I Want To Tell You A The Beatles 2:24
I Want You (She's So Heavy) The Beatles 7:48
I Will The Beatles 1:46
I'll Be Back The Beatles 2:22
I'll Cry Instead The Beatles 1:48
I'll Follow The Sun The Beatles 1:51
I'll Get You The Beatles 2:03
I'm A Loser The Beatles 2:33
I'm Down The Beatles 2:32
I'm Happy Just to Dance With You
I'm Looking Through You The Beatles 2:28
I'm Only Sleeping The Beatles 2:57
I'm So Tired The Beatles 2:03
I've Got A Feeling The Beatles
I've Just Seen A Face The Beatles 2:07
If I Fell The Beatles 2:22
If I Needed Someone The Beatles 2:24

In My Life The Beatles 2:25
The Inner Light E flat The Beatles 2:58
It Won't Be Long The Beatles 2:11
It's All Too Much The Beatles 6:28
It's Only Love The Beatles 1:59
Julia The Beatles 2:54
Lady Madonna A The Beatles 2:17 PM
Let it Be The Beatles 3:52
Little Child The Beatles 1:45
The Long and Winding Road The Beatles 3:35
Long, Long, Long The Beatles 3:04
Love Me Do The Beatles 2:24
Love You To C The Beatles 3:01
Lovely Rita E The Beatles 2:42
Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds A The Beatles 3:28
Maggie Mae The Beatles 0:41 Let It Be
Magical Mystery Tour E The Beatles 2:49
Martha My Dear The Beatles 2:29
Maxwell's Silver Hammer The Beatles 3:27
Mean Mr. Mustard The Beatles 1:06
Michelle The Beatles 2:42 PM
Misery The Beatles 1:50
Please Please Me
Mother Nature's Son The Beatles 2:48
Mr Moonlight The Beatles 2:37
The Night Before The Beatles 2:37
No Reply The Beatles 2:17
Norwegian Wood The Beatles 2:03
Not A Second Time The Beatles 2:08
Nowhere Man The Beatles 2:44
Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da The Beatles 3:09
Octopus's Garden The Beatles 2:51
Oh! Darling The Beatles 3:26
Old Brown Shoe The Beatles 3:20
One After 909 The Beatles 3:09
Only A Northern Song The Beatles 2:44
P.S. I Love You The Beatles 2:06
Paperback Writer The Beatles 2:18
Penny Lane B The Beatles 2:59 2
Piggies The Beatles 2:01
Please Please Me The Beatles 2:05
Polythene Pam The Beatles 1:11
Rain The Beatles 3:02 Past Masters Rock
Revolution The Beatles 3:24
Rocky Raccoon The Beatles 3:41
Run For Your Life The Beatles 2:19
Savoy Truffle The Beatles 2:55
Sexy Sadie The Beatles 3:15
She Came In Through The Bathroom Window
She Loves You The Beatles 2:21
She Said She Said Bflat The Beatles 2:37
She's A Woman The Beatles 3:03
She's Leaving Home E The Beatles 3:35
Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band
Something The Beatles 3:16
Strawberry Fields Forever A The Beatles 4:07
Sun King The Beatles 2:26 PM
Taxman D The Beatles 2:38
Tell Me What You See The Beatles 2:36
Tell Me Why The Beatles 2:10
Thank You Girl The Beatles 2:07
There's A Place The Beatles 1:53
Things We Said Today The Beatles 2:39
Think For Yourself The Beatles 2:19
This Boy The Beatles 2:16
Ticket to Ride The Beatles 3:10
Tomorrow Never Knows C The Beatles 2:58
Two Of Us The Beatles 3:36 Let It Be
Wait The Beatles 2:17 Rubber Soul
We Can Work It Out The Beatles 2:12
What Goes On The Beatles 2:46
What You're Doing The Beatles 2:31
When I Get Home The Beatles 2:18
When I'm Sixty Four C The Beatles 2:38
While My Guitar Gently Weeps The Beatles 4:45
Why Dont We Do It In The Road The Beatles 1:41
Wild Honey Pie The Beatles 1:01
With A Little Help From My Friends E
Within You, Without You C Band
The Word The Beatles 2:44
Yellow Submarine G The Beatles
Yer Blues The Beatles 4:01
Yes It Is The Beatles 2:40
Yesterday The Beatles 2:05
You Can't Do That
You Know My Name (Look up the Number
You Like Me Too Much
You Never Give Me Your Money
You Won't See Me
You're Going To Lose That Girl
You've Got To Hide Your Love Away
Your Mother Should Know C The Beatles 2:30

Call Roger at 646-255-3052 to simplify things if you look.