Forget it, old people. No more TV for you starting in 2009.

Funniest video I have seen in a couple weeks at least:

 

CLICK HERE to have a good laugh

 

Oh, someone told me you can't view that video outside the USA. so here it is

on youtube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iTSS8E7bKXg

 

ps. I have a few blogs cooking, just trying to find the time. Today I awoke to 739 unread emails. I am going nuts, I can't take this much longer. ugh!! I was the MC (host) for THE live karaoke band last night in Redbank, NJ. That is a lot of work. 2nd week in a row I did that for them. Hey, they pay well and I love the band, so it's all good. The night before, I went backstage to the COHEED AND CAMBRIA show at Terminal 5 to see my friend (their production manager). I had never heard of that band, but HELLO, it was sold out (all 5 of their shows there are sold out) as fuck. Packed with insane fans- they were all around 18-25 years old, and knew ever FUCKING WORD to every song. WOW. I will get into that more when I do a proper blog about it. So much going on.. I miss Europe, don't get to see Jasmine enough and wonder what will happen if Obama doesn't win. sigh. 

It's 6:27 am and I still have loads of work to do,

x

The USA Treasury Department has just issued a new dollar bill to reflect the state of the economy…

"Well I'm about to get up sick
From watchin' my T.V,

Been checkin' out the news
Until my eyeballs fail to see
I mean to say that every day
Is just another rotten mess
And when it's gonna change, my friend
Is anybody's guess
So I'm watching and I'm waiting
Hopin' for the best
Even think I go to praying
Every time I hear them sayin'
That there's no way to delay
That trouble comin' everyday
No way to delay
That trouble comin' every day

Wednesday I watched the riot
I've seen the cops out on the street
Watch them throwing rocks and stuff and choking in the heat
Listen to reports
About the whiskey passin' round
Seen the smoke and fire
And the market burnin' down
Watched while everybody on his street would take a turn
They stomp and smash and bash and crash and slash and bust 'n burn
And I'm watching and I'm waitin hopin' for the best
Even think I go to prayin'
Every time I hear em sayin'
That there's no way to delay
That trouble comin' every day
No way to delay
That trouble comin' everyday

You can cool it
You can heat it
Cause baby I don't need it
Take your t.v. tube and eat it
And all that phony stuff on sports
And all those unconfirmed reports
You know I watch that rotten box
Until my head begin to hurt
From checkin' out the way
The newsmen say they get the dirt
Before the guys on channel so and so
And further they assert
That any show they litter up
They bring you news if it comes up
They say that if the place blows up
They will be the first to tell
Cause the boys they got downtown
Working hard and doin swell
And if anybody gets the news
Before it hits the streets
They say that no one blams it faster
Their coverage can't be beat
And if another woman driver
Gets machine gunned from her seat
They'll send some joker with a brownie
And youll see it all complete

So I'm watching and I'm waiting
Hopin for the best
Even think I go to praying
Every time I hear them saying
That there's no way to delay
That trouble comin' everyday
No way to delay
That trouble comin' every day

Well I've seen the fires burnin'
And the local people turnin'
All the merchants and the shops
Who use to sell their brooms and mops
And every other household item
Watch the mob just turn and bite em
And they say it serve them right
Because a few of them are white
And it's the same across the nation
Black and white discrimination
Yell and you can understand me
And all that other crap they hand me
In the papers and t.v.
And all that mass stupidity
That seems to grow more everyday
These time of year some asshole say
He wants to go and do you in
Cause the color of your skin
Just don't appeal to him
No matter if it's black or white
Because he's out for blood tonight"

 

Frank Zappa

“Women against Sarah Palin” http://womenagainstsarahpalin.blogspot.com/

On behalf of Lyra Kilston and Quinn Latimer, editors at the esteemed art 
> magazine Modern Painters, I pass on the following--
>
>
> Friends, compatriots, fellow-lamenters,
>
>
> We are writing to you because of the dread we have felt since the announcement
> of Sarah Palin as the Vice-Presidential candidate for the Republican Party. We
> believe that this terrible decision has surpassed mere partisanship, and that
> it is a dangerous farce on the part of a pandering and rudderless Presidential
> candidate that has a real possibility of becoming fact.
>
> Perhaps like us, as American women, you share the fear of what Ms. Palin and
> her professed beliefs and proven record could lead to for ourselves and for
> our present or future daughters. To date, she is against sex education, birth
> control, the pro-choice platform, environmental protection, alternative energy
> development, freedom of speech (as mayor she wanted to ban books and attempted
> to fire the librarian who stood against her), gun control, the separation of
> church and state, and polar bears. To say nothing of her complete lack of real
> preparation to become the second-most-powerful person on the planet.
>
> We want to clarify that we are not against Sarah Palin as a woman, a mother,
> or, for that matter, a parent of a pregnant teenager, but solely as a rash,
> incompetent, and all together devastating choice for Vice President. Ms.
> Palin's political views are in every way a slap in the face to the
> accomplishments that our mothers and grandmothers and great-grandmothers so
> fiercely fought for, and that we've so demonstrably benefited from.
>
> First and foremost, Ms. Palin does not represent us. She does not demonstrate
> or uphold our interests as American women. It is presumed that the inclusion
> of a woman on the Republican ticket could win over women voters. We want to
> disagree, publicly.
>
> Therefore, we invite you to reply here <mailto: womensaynopalin@gmail.com with
> a short, succinct message about why you, as a woman living in this country, do
> not support this candidate as second-in-command for our nation.
>
> Please include your name (last initial is fine), age, and place of residence.
>
> We will post your responses on a blog called "Women Against Sarah Palin,"
> which we intend to publicize as widely as possible. Please send us your reply
> at your earliest convenience, the greater the volume of responses we receive,
> the stronger our message will be.
>
> Thank you for your time and action.
>
> VIVA!
>
> Sincerely,
>
> Quinn Latimer and Lyra Kilston
> New York, NY
 
http://womenagainstsarahpalin.blogspot.com/  

Hertha BSC Berlin vs. Liverpool FC: Soccer in Germany

 

 

 ^ Video I made at the match  Oh hells yeah

 


My mate Julie and I bought tickets to go see Liverpool play Hertha here in Berlin at the Olympia Stadium. Last time I was there was a couple summers ago to see the Stones.  I actually saw Liverpool FC play there before, think it was August 1993. So fun to watch them play. They are amazing. AND The Beatles come from Liverpool, so naturally I am going to support them. Their color is RED, so my gal pal and I wore red. 

Tickets were only 25 euros ($35?), which is pretty fair. This was just a "friendly" match, nothing big at risk. Everyone was super relaxed (read:drunk) and having a great time.  

 

 Olympia Stadium, Berlin  (not taken day of game fyi)  

 

Our seats weren't that great, or even next to each other, but we managed to find an easy going security guard who went against the strict German rules and let us in a section that wasn't *gasp* the one on our ticket. We wanted to sit with Liverpool supporters (where the most red shirts were). As I said in my video, above, we soon found out, that just because they were wearing red and supporting Liverpool, doesn't mean they are FROM Liverpool, or even the UK. There were all East Germans, yes, I know, there is no more "East or West" officially, but mentally, it's still here. The "Ossi's hate the Wessi's" etc.. Anyways, the East Germans HATE Hertha (Berlin's Football club) so much because they are "West" that they would rather support the "Inselaffen" as they call the Brits (the Island Apes, because the UK is an island, blah blah).

 

   

Lots of players falling down and lots of "ecken" (corners?) wtf does that mean? I admit, I don't know all the football lingo and all, but it's even worse trying to figure out the football lingo in another language. I can speak and read (and write) German, but these sport terms had me confused.

 

We did the wave a few times. I love that. We all sang the football songs, and Julie told me as I walked up to have a slash (piss) the guys were singing "Get your tits out" but I didn't even notice because I thought it was just another football chant and blocked it out. ha ha. 

 

These lads sat two rows in front of us and asked us to pose for pictures like 10 times. They are from East Germany too. 

 
   

Julies perky tits are a bit hidden here… I guess I squashed them. Sorry Julie. Word: Underwire Bra.  

 

 A sporty sausage fest. 

 

Julie and I were asked by at least 50 guys to pose with them for a picture. So, why not ask them to take one of us? Julie was like "wot the FUCK Dot? Why are all these people asking us for pictures??". A couple of the German guys asked me if I was 'Dr. Dot' and one said he saw me on TV, one on Big Brother (I was in the BIg Brother container for one whole day a few years ago massaging all the peeps. You can see pics at www.puredrdot.com click on LINKS and see Big Brother banner). It was actually getting embarrassing as people were trying to watch the game and there was this massive hoopla around us, omfg. I am UNDER exaggerating. Seriously. Wish Julie would put her two cents it. She is a writer too, so perhaps she will blog too. The girls seated a few rows up from us were shooting daggers at us with there eyes. Hey, get yourself a red dress. Red is THE color apparently. 

Julie and I took a taxi to the game to save time, but decided to take the S-Bahn (over ground train) towards home. It was so fucking packed outside the Olympia Stadium anyways, that no taxi would ever get through. So we plowed along with the hordes of football fans (some hooligans too) and squeezed onto the train. I usually never take public transport here (used to years ago) because you can basically walk anywhere in Berlin (keeps legs slim), rollerblade or walk. PLUS, Germans fucking STARE. I mean they REALLY do not know the difference between an innocent glance and an outright 5 minute long stare. No one has ever taught them that it's kinda rude. lol. I remember dating a massive brick layer from London named Kevin years ago, like hmmm, 1993, here in Berlin. He was a weight lifter and built like a brick shit house (normally not my type, but he loved Elvis, so that won him brownie points). Anyways, I remember my fling with Kevin didn't last long because every time we went somewhere in public, like a pub or the underground train, Germans would stare at us (I was doing Madonna dopple-gaenger shows (impersonations) for money because I could not speak German yet and so I had a short white wavy bob (like her Blonde Ambition tour cut) and super thin eyebrows and he looked like a fucking wrestler. Anyways, they would stare and he was so aggressive (he told me he took steroids to get bigger muscles ) he would SCREAM at all the Germans who looked at us, which of course, brought more attention to us, and then more aggression from him towards them. Omfg. Nightmare. Anyways, Germans stare and I was dressed in red, as you can see, and had the cleavage on at full force (hey, we only live once, let them breath. Someday they will shrivel up and rot, so for now, they are out). 

The guys on the train heard Julie and I talking in English (we can both speak fluent German) so the lads didn't know we could understand them at all. The train was PACKED and they were  making LOUD, obnoxious comments about her skirt, her tits, my tits, my dress, etc. We just smile to each other and kept on talking. After a few stops, some seats became available and she and I sat across from one another and the hooligans sat next to us (there were loads of them). The train got a bit quiet when they sat down next to us and they kept on talking about how they would LOVE to do this and that to us. They suddenly I turned to the loudest one and in perfect German, loud enough for everyone to hear, I asked "So what was that you said awhile ago about my tits?". His jaw hit the floor. They all turned bright red (guessing they were around 20 years old). The whole train, apart from them, was laughing their asses off. Snap. 

 I wasn't offended or pissed, I mean, if you dress that way, you have to expect some flack (got it every day in High School when I was dating Joey Ramone, but instead of Red, I was wearing PINK every day (hate pink now, would never wear it again). Most of the time, I wear sporty clothes, but sometimes I like to vamp it up. SO bring it on, I have a massive sense of humor and a sharp tongue. What was that one of my friends called me the other night "Tornado Tongue." hmmmm. heh heh. 

Well, neither Julie nor I are BVG (Berliner public transportation) savvy, so we got off at the Hauptbahnhof (main train station) and were both so famished we would have eating the South end of a North bound skunk at that point. We scarfed down some amazing German bread (Germans make the BEST fucking bread I have ever had) and then headed over to Murry's Irish Pub (used to be the Emerald Isle). My mate Steve is the cook there (he is from Dublin and is engaged to a German lady). A lot of the English speaking community of Berlin hangs here at Murry's. Hey, if you feel like just speaking English, you hang out with fellow English speakers. So we do.

 
 Great BOWIE shirt, no?  Sid and Nancy in Berlin? ^

 This is "Beano" and he is from Ireland and reminds me of Sid Vicious . He sings with a punk band too. The blond girl (Anne) is his German pal. All of us English mother tongue folk all see each other about town, drink at the same places and basically all know each other. Most of us all get along. 

 Two English regulars (guy at far left if Graham)  and Steve (did his hair blond recently) and Julie. Dam I wish I could remember everyone's names. Why can't people wear name tags? heh. 

 

Steve and I ^  My neck looks like one of the Olsen twins in this pic. sigh. 

Another blog, another morning that I am STILL up at 9am. Seriously thinking of going to Thailand for Christmas and New Years. Just a random thought. I need something new; always going to the same places. Just a tad afraid of the mosquitos(sp?), American haters (will I get kid naped and decapitated live on TV? Will a hurricane wash me away? What a pussy I am turning into lately.). If you have been to Thailand, tpell me, where did you go? Where is the best place to go? Not into lady boys and shopping. Clean beaches, good hotels and mostly, where one can feel safe. Yawn, off to bed.

x

Dr. Dot