Dr. Dot update

Dot-NYC-June-2017

It’s been a long time since I posted a blog other than introducing a new Dot-Bot. Life got too busy for my blogging fingers. Used to LOVE to blog but then hurricane Desmond came into my life 🙂

He is now almost 5 years old (August 20th is his birthday) and I love him soooooo much. He brings me happiness everyday. He says the funniest things- I just can’t even believe.

Last night he said “you can not get old Mama. I might not love you if you get old. Stay like this please Mama” and I said “well everyone gets old Desmond. Or they die. Do you want me to get old and be around or do you want me to die like Muny. Then you will never see me again if I die” and he said “umm, well just don’t get old. What is this about Getting Old

that everyone wants to do it? Why do they want to get old anyways?” hahaha. I said “well no one WANTS to get old, it is just part of life my cutie”. And he said I want to not get old”

So funny how little kids are so honest and how their questions and thoughts make us grown-ups think again and laugh out loud. He is such a blessing and I savor every minute

of everyday even though I am walking around so tired I FEEL like I am gonna die lol.

Probably would make some people annoyed but I let him sleep in my bed. He HAS a bed but refuses to stay in it. He wants to sleep next to mama. And he is a restless sleeper. omg. He kicks, tosses, turns, wants a sip of water; wakes to make sure I am here next to him. Looking at him right now; the little angel. Of course I felt this way when my daughter Jasmine was his age too but nothing compares to the love between a Mother and Son. It’s the same between a Father and Daughter I hear. Mommy’s little Boy and Daddy’s little girl they say. Well in my case, it stands true. Oh how it does. He shows me unconditional love that makes my heart swell with happiness (except in the supermarket sometimes lol – where if I do NOT buy the toy of his desire he throws a wobbler (tantrum) that seems like he has retracted any love for me hahaha).

I would do anything for my children, anytime, anywhere, it’s all for them. Every dime I earn I would gladly give to them. Best love in the world. So happy. Mind you, if I could buy sleep, I would be bankrupt in a heart beat 🙂

Not easy having a 4 year old at my age. Oh Come on, you know I am no Spring Chicken anymore. Just wish I had 10 little children to take care of but you know how expensive life is and taking care of kids is dear (expensive). So I just savor this one and give him all of my love and attention. I have to wait until he goes to bed (usually late at night!) to start working (the 800+ emails I receive everyday and I mean, every SINGLE day) have to be taken care of otherwise they back up and then the next day I have twice as many. And every parent (who is NOT a Millionaire) knows there is the daily grind at home with house work… trash, laundry, dishes, floors, shopping, cooking, etc..Very hard to maintain friendships or any sort of physical activity. But that is reality when you choose to be a parent. Plus we ALL know I have had quite a run up until then, like up until about 2010, I had so much freedom and so many adventures- well my daughter was grown by then and I was free to travel, work, work out, sing, SLEEP etc 🙂 So it was a HUGE adjustment to be where I am at right now.

Hoping to get my book done SOON. Calling my book “Before I forget” because face it, I need to get my adventures in writing, before I get to old and freakin’ forget. Just my photographs alone need to be published for all to enjoy. I am sort of like the Rock and Roll cinderella or the Forrest Gump of Rock and Roll, these tid-bits need to be shared.

But where would these spare hours come from? Who knows. I barely have time to sleep- ever. Maybe when Desmond starts school this coming Sept. But I was hoping to use those hours to sleep and recover. Head still hurts from those two pesky Brain surgeries I had.. August 2016 and January 2017.. remember? I had two tumors removed.. huge process. And really had minimal help at home to recover, well it was never enough help, especially the first time in August, I was up cooking my own meals and doing housework and alone with Desmond most of the time. It was hell but it kept me so busy I didn’t notice the pain like most people would have. NO Pain killers apart from a few Tylenol PM’s, but then hardly even any of those. Not a fan of drugs of any kind. I threw a full, unopened bottle of Percaset (spelling?) away that my brain surgeon gave me. Did not even want to try one. So afraid of being hooked on such things. Like what happened to Prince. Sad.

I did have help the 2nd time around, but it was never enough. My friend Steve moved in for a while to help with Desmond. I got to sleep a bit more than I normally would. But taking care of Desmond literally requires 3 adults full time lol. Anyone who knows me well, knows this fact. “Takes a village to raise a child” is correct. Sadly I have ZERO relatives in my state. They all live super far away- NH, GA, FLA, CT… no one around. And friends are too busy too; swamped in their own lives, so it’s brutal.

Anyways, I am rambling on.. gotta sleep, just checking in to vent and gush about my little Son who I adore so much. Daughter lives in Germany and I barely see her but that’s life- when they grow up, they live their own lives so cherish them while you can

x

Dr. Dot

19423994_1644480305565519_1839101555277117057_n 13495044_1263078193705734_5042101949777406244_n 18221680_1582791965067687_8039745634715954446_n 18519426_1599286663418217_6714724767087650642_n 17861748_1559887920691425_8364270529401929076_n 17883781_1561788653834685_3723378685163694466_n 15698282_10154621853845546_1634858422945269355_n 15784719_10154621881745546_686707466_o

^ My Daughter and Son together. Pure bliss <3

Ask Dr. Dot March 2011

 
 
Send your questions/problems to drdot@drdot.com and do not worry, I always change the names around, so your secret is safe with me, 
Dr. Dot
 
 
Q.

 

So I finally did things the correct way, dating a man for a while before fucking or sucking him. He is 30, very attractive and hilarious-makes me laugh til it hurts. We started with oral and when I got down there I found a mini penis attached to him. What? Such a disappointment. I would feel like a cunt if I broke up with him due to his teenie weenie. It does get hard occasionally (he has diabetes and it appears that makes a difference). I will never find the right man. If they are well hung, they seem to be arrogant. When they are kind, sure enough, willy the size of a thumb. Am I shallow?

Goldie Cocks

 

 

A.

You can help his cock out by fucking him on the floor. Throw a thick blanket (so you don't bang up your knees) on the floor, put a pillow vertically under his ass and squat on him. This will ensure you get every millimeter of his manhood up inside you. As far as him being soft due to Diabetes, you can ask him in a sexy way to try some Viagra for you. It's ok for a young, fit man to try it once in awhile (the older, heavier men with weaker hearts are the ones whoneed to be very careful taking Viagra). If you really like this guy (it sounds like you do) try and help him out a bit. After all, sex usually doesn't last more than 2 hours a day, so it's a good idea to be with someone who can also stimulate your mind for the other 22hours, not just your snatch.

 

 

 

Q.

 I don't really have a problem, just fishing for some tips on how to spoil my woman. We've been together for 4 months now and sex is good but it seems to be plateauing. Tell me how to blow her mind Doc. Seriously.

 

Son of Suzy Cream-cheese

 

 

 

A.

 Try and make sure neither of you are full. Having sex on an empty stomach works best (more blood for your genitals). Get your room candle lit and have some Jimi Hendrix (or Prince) music on for her. Tell her to just lie there and let you spoil her. Massage her with some warm oil; her feet, legs, rump. Then when you get to the back, before you put any oil on her, start nibbling her back gently with your teeth. No tiny pinching bites; big, firm but not too hard, grasps, just enough to make her feel delicious enough to eat. Go up and down her back avoiding the spine and bony areas. Then massage her with the oil. Roll her over and nibble her inner thighs. Lick them from knee to crotch with big long firm tongue strokes. But make sure you take your time before diving into her pussy. Make her yearn for you. The longer you spend working on her body, the hungrier and hornier she will grow. You know what to do next.

 

 

 

 

Q.

 

I have been with my partner for 6 years and have a kid. I have recently found out the over the last 12 months she has often had sex with someone else. She even had a threesome with him and another guy. Is there anyway that we can work stuff out and still be a couple?

 

Bamboozled by Love 

 

  

A.

 

You can't really trust her anymore since she hid this from you. You need to decide how important sex is to you both. If you have a very deep connection and get a long really well outside the bedroom and she treats you well, you may want to over look her sexual habits  (or join in with them). However, if you are the jealous type and the thought of your woman sucking off some other guy really gets under your skin, you may have to leave her. It will be easier for you to find another woman that it will be for her to find a man to take her seriously.

Forbidding her from fucking other men would just be a huge waste of time. She would probably promise it right to your face but still shag around behind your back, so it really boils down to this: can you live withan open relationship or not as she likes a variation of cock.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Q.

 For 1 year I've been with a Scottish bloke. We've known each other since childhood and he moved away 20 yrs ago & recently found me online. We talked; catching up on the past. He was married and has a son and I was married and also have a son.

 

Aftera while, we noticed that it clicked. And the first time we saw each other again….. BOOM! Since then, we were just so good together. Everything was right, humor, talking and insanely hot sex. His son likes me; my son digs him. Brilliant. We'd both gone through our shit and saw that this was a good thing happening.

 

For a year now, we've been back & forth to see each other. He can't leave cause he has a business there and my son goes to a fantastic school and I've a great job here.

 

I'm still keen but he's turned “cooler”. He doesn't call much &he used to go overboard & I'm spoilt from it, but now it's next to nothing. I don't wanna nag, cos that's not me, but at the same time I don't wanna just let it slip. He says he loves me but he's “overwhelmed”. His business had a set back and it's making him grumpy.

 

It's like a drug he gave me for a year & now it's cold turkey. What does a woman do, that wants her bloke to love her like before? I don't recall feeling this way before. That's why I'm frustrated &not sure how to react

 

Maggie Mae

 

 

 

A.

 

Men usually put work first, so if they love their work and all is going well with work, they are happy and it is easy for them to treat theirloved ones well. If work is shit, their moods turn to shit and theyjust do not have the energy or desire to be overly nice to anyone. Just keep busy and if he gets in touch, do not mention the lack of communication, just be happy to hear from him. You two went all those years without contact and you were still ok, what's a week or two with no contact now? All relationships chill out after a while, yeah, that sucks as that "drug" is oh so fucking awesome, but it is not reality. Let him do his thing and come to you when he needs you.

Do NOT nag, whine, cry or mention it, just keep busy and you will be the "different" woman who doesn't give him shit. Join a yoga class, learn how to massage, belly dance,etc. anything to prevent him from being the center of your universe. First comes you, then your son, THEN him.  If he still doesn't come bouncing back, you will still be fit and happy because of all the new shit you've been busy learning and that will make you attractive to the next lucky fucker who comes your way.

 

 

Ask Dr. Dot February 2011


Free Love, Sex and Relationship advice: drdot@drdot.com 




 Q.

Recently I started dating this guy, 26 years old. I am a 28. When we first met, I had been going to his place as I paid him to fix my lap top. I thought that he was gay, because of his mannerisms. He acts and talks very feminine. However, he hit on me and I was surprised but flattered as he is very handsome. I flat out asked him “aren't you gay?”. He hesitantly said, “no”. Then I asked if he was bisexual and he said “not really”. I said “What? Have you ever made out with a man?” and then he told me “yes once or twice”. I don't understand this. How can one not know if they are gay or not? Making out with a man, if you're a man, is gay. He says he doesn't like to be labeled, but I need to know. How can I handle this without scaring him off? He has a HUGE fat cock, which I sucked once already (loves it!) but I am wondering, has it been in a few men's asses or has he been fucked in the ass? Will my twat be enough for this dude?

Dude looks like a lady

 

 

 

A.

A new lover is sort of like a used car; it may seem new to you but you just can never tell how many or what kind people have ridden in it before you got it. I have met a few well hung men who have also pitched for both teams simply because they feel their massive cocks are too precious to be limited to one gender. They want EVERYONE to worship their gigantic rods. If he treats you well and you use protection, just enjoy him for what he is, a well endowed, open minded amusement park ride. You can't change the past, so just enjoy the present (pun intended).

 

Q.

I've been seeing this man for the past few months and we laugh a lot and have a great time but I feel like I am being taken advantage of sometimes. I cook, drive to him ( he lives 30 miles away) . I have to pay sometimes when we go out as he is out of work. I guess I want to prove that not all girls are after a Man's money. I spend a lot on gas and even feed his cat. How can I get out of this routine without coming across as being mean?

 Lovely Linda

 

 

A.

If you give too much people will take too much. Be nice but stop giving. See what happens. You will find out if he still wants to come around and see you, etc. If he asks you why the sudden change, tell him "I am exhausted from making such a big effort for us". You need to know the truth. If he really wants you, he will make a bigger effort and start being more generous. Keep in mind, there is one thing you can never change and that is biology; The sperm come to the egg; not the egg to the sperm.

 

 

 

Q.

I'm 20 years old with an 18 year old fiancee. Young, yes, but we have a lot of love for each other. Just recently she has been shying away from sex, she said she just didn't have the urge to… She had recently been put on the depo birth control shot. Which I figured (A) Sometimes people go through dry spells, and (B) Birth control can really play a toll on females. Well on top of the whole not having sex thing, she has become more stand-offish. She will fight with me about anything, and yell at me for the simplest of things. I don't know what is going on, I don't want to believe she's being unfaithful because I trust her. She was walking to grab a screw driver just now and turned around half way through the hall to grab her phone, maybe because she knew I would go through it, or was waiting for a friend to respond, I don't know the case.I really am fighting to hold on to what I have, but it seems like every time I try to better things, they become worse. And thoughts? Tips? Advice? What should I do? I'm really lost,

Hasty Hal

 

 

 

A.

You say you trust her yet she “knew” you would go through her mobile phone when it was unattended. This proves something is brewing between you two. First of all, she is only 18. She probably doesn't know her ass from her elbow yet. Her yelling at you and protecting her phone are signs that she is bored with the relationship, probably having an affair (this is pretty much expected from teen-agers). At your age (20 and 18) getting engaged may be a sweet gesture but you see now that the security you sought is quickly killing the love and passion you had. I suggest sitting her down and telling her you love her madly, still want to be romantically involved but are calling off the engagement. Tell her "why rush into things? I can see the pressure of being engaged is getting to both of us, there is no rush, we are both young, lets just love each other and forget the contract". If you don't have the balls to tell her to her face, write a nice letter to her, making sure you stress the fact you are not breaking up with her, just ridding the engagement which you feel has changed things. Stand by your decision and you will find out the truth; she will either crave you more or be relieved and move on to whatever it is that is distracting her so much. You need to know and this gesture will show you if she can live without you or not. Getting married, in my opinion, is old fashioned and unnecessary-unless immigration plays a role in it. Getting married before age 30 is just inviting chaos into your life.

 

Q.

I am 22 years old girl and had my first relationship with a guy who took my virginity and after few months he dumped me. I decided have another affair with a guy who made me pregnant. I am not in a good relationship and I wish to go back to my first boyfriend who too my cherry and ran. I try to find his whereabouts but only found that he's in jail and was sentenced for 15 years. I love him very much and I wish to have him back whenever he comes out of jail; am i right to go back to him? I miss him so badly and I have a 4 years old daughter I don't know if he will accept me. Help me.

Ditzy Donna

 

 

 

A.

You may THINK you "love him" but loving someone who doesn't want you is retarded. People tend to romanticize about their first ever lover. The one who took their virginity sometimes stays in our hearts and minds but this does not mean they are "the one". In fact it seldom ever works out being the one. He already dumped you once. It's over. It will never work out. Not only does he not want you (you can TELL when a man wants you, he makes it very clear by calling, texting, emailing, trying to find you like the sperm tries to find the egg) but he is in JAIL. Do you really think this is the best father figure for your daughter? You need to get busy as it sounds like you have way too much free time. Would you want your daughter to spend her time chasing a criminal who doesn't even want her? I doubt it. Set a good example for your kid by working hard and only loving men who love you (and I don't just mean sex you, I mean LOVE you). You are wasting your time even thinking about this idiot. Get busy, move on and the right man will come along. Men usually don't mind when a woman has a child already, especially a cute little daughter. It shows them you are capable of pushing out a healthy kid and either gives them hope they will get one out of you too or if they don't want any of their own, they will enjoy the fact you have one and won't be bothering them for a child.

 

 

Q.

I have been dating my girlfriend for almost a year now, and we have been having serious relationship issues because every time we have sex, she gets a yeast infection. Its to the point where she resents me so much for it, that we constantly fight, argue, and refrain from sex all together. She claims its my fault and I keep giving it to her, but I don't feel any symptoms and she is the only girl I have had this problem with. I work part time and I don't have medical insurance so I haven't had the chance to see a doctor either. I really love her, and I don't want to do anything stupid like cheat on her, but more importantly I don't want to lose her over this. What can I do?

 Tortured Tommy

 

 

A.

This happens A LOT. Tell her to make sure she cuts back on eating sugar, carbs and avoid using any soaps on her snatch. Get some yeast infection cream, like Yeast Guard or something similar. Try and give it a rest for a few days to work it's magic (if you simply have to fuck, use the creme as lubrication). She also needs to wear cotton panties (no thongs) to bed so her crotch can breath. You can both eat acidophilus tablets and lots of natural yogurt to keep your bodies bacteria in check. Try using a condom next time, perhaps that will help. Tell her MANY women get itchy/irritated pussies after sex and it's not your fault that she too much cheese on her Taco.

 

Ask Dr. Dot December 2010


Email me: drdot@drdot.com  your questions and I will answer them personally. I always alter the names so your secrets are safe with me x





Q.

My girlfriend and I (both in our 40's) have been together for 16 months, and live together for last 6 months (her flat).  Pretty fast I know, but finances played a role (I am out of work).
She seems to shave her pussy before she goes out with her "male mates" without me (she has quite a few), She told me she slept around A LOT before she met me, and though she also told me she never cheated on a boyfriend, I did find that she lied about having slept with a particular one of her closest  "male mates" prior to meeting me. She also recently told me she feels like she has to lie about seeing some of said mates because she thinks I won't like it.
I told her the truth is extremely important, and if I have any discomfort, it is far LESS important than telling the truth, and we could talk about it.
Thus, I am now left feeling uncomfortable with the situation and am not sure how to deal with it. How far would she take these lies? Any advice

-Wondering Wilhelm



A.
Perhaps she feels she has the right to behave like this since you aren't contributing financially. She seems to be acting like a macho man.
You have already caught her in a big lie and frequent "little lies"; she admitted to feeling like she "has to lie to you" (too much lying going on here) and no one has to shave their genitals before going to out meet "friends". It sounds to me like she thinks of you as a Dad or a Brother, not a boyfriend.
At her age, I really doubt she will be changing her behavior patterns anytime soon. She used to be very promiscuous? Once a slag; always a slag-
not that it's a bad thing but that shit never changes and it seems to bother you. Either accept her "independent ways" or find another roommate to help with the rent. You will easily find another woman to love you but she will have a hard time finding any man to put up with her bullshit, especially at that age.

Q.

After my divorce I have just had my first experience with a man. As I never used condoms with my husband I never remembered to use one with him.
He was younger than me and very clean and sporty so I also did not see him as a big risk. Have I broken a big taboo by having a one-niter in this fashion and need to watch out in the future or is the odd one ok?

Petrified Paula


A.

You can't judge some by their age or appearance. Some young people sleep around much more than older people, simply because they can.
Using a condom is always the best route to take. I would go have a check up and blood test to ease your mind.

 


Q.

 

I have been dating a woman for last six months. Once we had a conversation about cheating. I said I would never do that, and that if I wanted to be someone else that would mean we should not be together. I really do believe that. When I asked her would she cheat, she said “ I would cheat on you if you piss me off!”. I could hardly believe what she said. In my opinion this is a very bad sign, especially since we did have 2-3 times when one of us got pissed. I think that conflicts happen sometimes in mature relationships, we are both 45+ years old, and having what I think so far was a serious relationship. When I told her later that this did not sound very good, she tried to avoid direct answer, excusing it on her previous husband who cheated on her and that she was reflecting on that. Sounds quite bad to me.

 

Non cheating boyfriend.

 

 

 

A.

Women usually stray for two reasons (1) Revenge (2) To get more attention/admiration if they are not getting enough with their partner. Most women do not cheat when they are in love. The word cheating bothers me. One cheats on a test or at a game, but not so, in my opinion, in a relationship. The difference between dating and marriage, in my eyes, is people should still be able to do whatever they want before they make that HUGE commitment called marriage. “Cheating” used to be called "playing the field". Thing is, you can NOT force someone to be monogamous. People are physically committed when they want to be. Stressing about monogamy will not coax it along; it will simply push your lover away. EVERYONE loves to do forbidden things, so if you forbid her to shag around, it will be on the top of her list of things to do. All one can really do is be kind, fun to be around and a generous partner ( be wild in bed, willing to massage when asked, etc) and this should make your lover want to be exclusive to you. If you do all that and they still want to fuck around, so be it. When people reach the age of 45, they are pretty much set in their ways. No teaching older dogs new tricks. Avoid having "conversations about cheating" as often as you can, as that will surely lead to drama. If she says she might "cheat" if you piss her off, try not to piss her off.

 

 

 

 

Q.

 

Is there any safe way of licking pussy? Last time I licked my new girlfriends pussy, the bottom of my tongue was black and blue and tender as fuck for days and my bottom lip looked like someone punched me. I LOVE licking her pussy but she moves about a lot when I am at it and I pay the price for the few days after. I have not licked pussy for a couple of years as I underwent cancer treatments and it seems I must have forgotten how. Her favorite thing is oral, so I have to keep at this.

 

Swollen but Eager

 

 

A.

 

I know what you mean. Not an easy task. Go to a drug store (CVS, Walgreens, etc) and get those rubber teeth guards one wears to avoid grinding teeth while sleeping. If you can't find those, look for the rubber inserts they sell with teeth bleaching kits, or lie to your dentist and tell them you tend to grind your teeth at night and want to prevent any damage. Put those on you and then give it a try. You won't injure yourself and will probably be able to munch her out longer and more intense than ever before. One thing to look forward to, you won't have this problem later in life when you lose all your teeth.

 

Not sure if they are for sale yet, but the oral condom could help too…

 

Ask Dr. Dot Sept. 2010

Please feel free to email me drdot@drdot.com  with any questions you have, I always change the names around, so you're secrets are safe with me 😉 

 

 

 

 


Q.



I found out the man I've been with for three years has been having a very intimate correspondence with a woman. Not sexually but emotionally. He knows I can open his email as we sometimes shared it for work. He deletes some mails but forgets to delete others. I know it's invasive but I just couldn't stop.
We live apart as he "loves his space". He is 36 and I am 45 but I look young for my age and he looks old for his age.
I'm very dependent on him, not only emotionally – my 16 year old son sees him as the male authority, we spend vacations all together, etc.
He's never seen this woman, only talks to her on the phone sometimes as I learned from his mails. 
I don't blame the woman as he made her believe he's single. She's married but obviously looking for changes in her life. I knew he liked to be surrounded by women – both virtually and in reality so I thought she was just one of his fan club but this is different. He's talking to her practically in the same way he talks to me.
I'm trying to ignore this and not tell him anything but it's torture. He sees something is wrong with me. He treats me so nice, we see each other almost daily and have sex only once a week ( I want it more!).
What's worse we've long planned to spend Christmas holidays with my son and his mother in the country where she lives. The woman lives in the same country.
Now my boyfriend tells me he wants to stay there longer to spend more time with his mother after we leave. What should I do? Cancel the trip altogether?
 But my son wants to go and I have my own friends there that I wanted to see. Keep ignoring this and let him do whatever he wants to do? But I'm very emotional and I know I won't be able to feign indifference for a long time. it makes me really sick, I can't concentrate on anything and I know it damages my ties with my son and other people and even my work performance.


 

Cynthia the Couga
r

 

 

 A.

The more you try to prevent this meeting from happening, the more exciting and important it will become for him. If you email her and tell her he is 'taken',  you will loose him for good as he clearly likes and demands his freedom. If you confess that you have been following this affair per email, he will see you as a nosy, sneaky, jealous and clingy ball and chain. You two are not engaged, not married or even living together so neither of you can demand monogamy. Would you REALLY want to prevent him from doing something he really wants to do? You would then start to wonder if he is only with you because you intercepted and what would stop him from finding another female fan in the future? Don't mess with fate. If it is meant to be, it is meant to be. Like the boss says, everybody has a hungry heart. He may just be bored. You say he treats you and your son very well and takes care of you and even fucks your properly once a week. You can NOT expect more from a person.

 You can't chain them physically down and put blinders on them ensuring they are focused only on you and why would one want that? 
Just remain calm, stay busy, work out, stay sexy and easy going, get ready for your trip and see how it unfolds. Either way you win. He will either find her boring in
person or irresistible and this would then set you free from the  constant wondering and feeling of being 2ND in line. You can't change this situation, you can only change how you handle it. Perhaps SHE will find out he is taken and flip out making him appreciate you even more. Let him play his little game, you need to stay busy and enjoy your life, we only get one, this is not a dress rehearsal. 



Q.


 I just starting seeing this amazing girl and we have great sex often, she is amazingly beautiful but a little insecure in bed not helped by the fact shitty ex bf told her she was a wank jump. I am really into giving her orgasms whenever possible but basically the head job discussion is completely OFF LIMITS. She has advised it's strictly Christmas or birthdays, but has made it clear she's just not into it. I've tried the denial method but fuck that, I love eating vagina. Part of me thinks who cares I'm with someone who likes me but I think maybe the denial is making me want it more. She is young (21) and I'm 34 which is fine, but she had a tough time in her teenage years.

Oral Otis

 

 



A.

You have "great sex often" with a  girl who is more than ten years younger than you? Please count your blessings and stop whining. Eventually she will come around and let you lick her pussy on a more regular basis. She is 21,  which is when most women are merely starting to figure out what they like and dislike in bed AND you just started seeing her, so please chill and be more patient. Ask her if she would try 69 with you, that way her pussy isn't the only focal point. If she still frowns upon it, oh well, you are still getting what most men crave; regular great sex with a younger woman. If you give up and leave her, the next girl may hate GIVING oral, then you will really be fucked!

 

 

 


Q.


 I am a Premature ejaculator. I doubt I am the only one with this problem, but I suffer from this greatly. My last girlfriend cheated on me and when I confronted her she said "I had to fuck someone else, you don't satisfy me" since then, I haven't stated another relationship as I am feeling unworthy of any pussy. My penis is rather large, but I can't hold out for more than 2 minutes. Any advice you have for me would be a gift for me.

Quick Nick

 

 

 


A.


There are some tricks you can try (1) Wank off hours before you see your girl (2) Always use a condom so it doesn't feel so overwhelmingly amazing (3) Fuck standing up (ejaculation will take longer as your brain is slightly preoccupied keeping you standing & less blood will be in your cock; some has to be in the legs to keep you up and moving  (4) Make her cum BEFORE you even start fucking her so she has less to complain about if you finish quickly once you're in there (5) Date a woman who could care less about sex (I KNOW there are many out there, I hear about them everyday from their frustrated partners).

 


Q.


Relatives keep giving winding me up about being a 36 year old single woman. I really can't take all of this nagging anymore. They harp on me every chance they get. The "I just haven't met Mr. Right" expression isn't helping anymore. Am I the only one who just doesn't care if I am dating or not? I have a cat so I am never lonely.
Sick of it All Sally


A.


At the next family gathering as soon as someone goes there, in a very loud pitch say "I am single because I refuse to take it up the ass, which is a deal breaker nowadays." See how that grabs them.

Q.
 
 I love my wife of 18 yrs; everything used to be OK. I had a drinking problem, and I rarely got sex even though I wanted it.  I tried EVERYTHING to turn her on.
She's the receiver; never makes any effort to instigate or give sexual pleasure. I quit drinking a year ago and realized how controlling she is. We would be at a party, I would say “I'm going to go talk to whoever” & she would grab my shirt and tell me "NO, stay here, have a drink" Family members would put me down, yet she never said anything, etc.  She yells at me for no reason/snapping. I told her it gives me chest pain, yet she continues.
I let her control the bills; she has ruined my credit!
All this was OK till I started standing up for myself. We Almost divorced 3 times this year, but avoided it by me giving in and trying "once more".  Each time we reconciled she would give me all the sex I wanted (for awhile). Then started snapping at me again. I really cant afford to leave her, I don't make enough to live by myself and I love her but I WANT sex, BTW, she Loves me eating her out, but wont give me head where I get to come in her mouth, I told her I really want that- ( not happening ) when we do have sex shes never into it, she just tells me to " hurry" I feel I'm missing out on a lot. I don't know what to do. She says she Loves me more than anything- hhhmmmm

Suffocated Steve

 


A.
In my opinion, if she "loves you more than anything" she would let you cum in her mouth, stop bitching at you and smack the shit out of people who put you down. She is probably so used to you being drunk and apathetic that she doesn't really know the real you anymore and can't understand why you can't be ordered around anymore. If you are going to stay with her, you need to write her a letter so you can get your real thoughts out on paper without her having the chance to interrupt or snap at you while doing so. Tell her you are sorry for being drunk for so many years, but you are back and it is time for you to make up for loss time and take charge of your bills, household, spunk and life in general. She can either relax and enjoy the new your or move the fuck on and spend some other wimps money. Words don't mean anything. Anyone can SAY "I love you" but their actions reveal the truth of the matter. I would personally rather be broke than live with someone who sucks in bed, spends all my money and nags at me. If you do leave her, avoid getting married again, the same fucking thing will happen all over again. Like Chris Rock says "if you like fucking, don't get married".

 



Ask Dr. Dot June 2010 ( Sex, Love and Relationship advice)

Please feel free to send me your questions, I always change the names around, so your secret is safe with me: drdot@drdot.com 

 

 


Q.


I think I am experiencing the 7-year itch 4 years too soon. I feel like this happens to me in every long-term
relationship I’ve been in! At about 2 yrs into I’m just not that attracted to the guy as much, but the love is still very much there. I couldn’t imagine my life without him, but my sex drive is almost nonexistent these days!
I just don't understand. He is the most attractive man to me that I have been with; I love his body and our sex is amazing! In fact, I never had an orgasm until we had sex when I was 20! So, I knew he was the one for me.
But, now I’m just not interested. I never take it like I use to. Am I depressed? I just don't get it. Does this mean the relationship has run its course? I know I haven’t been happy at my day job and I have been thinking about just quitting to purse my modeling career.
It's just risky making a career move, you know? I have a lot on my plate so I have been hoping my lack of sex drive is because I am a workaholic. But, that’s not good either… sooo confused!!!
Fickle Francine

 

 



A.

You are only 22. THAT is why you feel that itch. You are too young to settle down and you are at the perfect age to experiment with career moves. Take a chance, we only live one time. This is not a dress rehearsal. The older you get the harder it is to make changes and take chances. In my opinion it is extremely difficult to keep the passion alive after a few years, you really have to work at it that's why I think sleeping in separate bedrooms or living near each other instead of with each other are good ideas to keep the flame alive. Perhaps you could try pulling away for a while, taking a break to concentrate on your career and see what happens.
If it is true love and meant to be, a break won't matter. A LOT of young girls fall for the first guy that makes them orgasm. They think, "Oh my GOD, this is the ONE! He made me feel like I've never felt before" but if you can make yourself cum; you can get that same physical feeling you get with most partners. Sex is naturally better when you are madly in love with the person but he doesn’t turn you on anymore, you may need to take a breather.
If you are on the birth control pill, an infamous passion killer, look into other forms of birth control like the
nova-ring or condoms.

Q.

What does it mean when a girls clit turns blue and then purple? My girlfriend's clit turned blue and then purple. Freaking out here. Does she have a disease? Did I break it?

Bewildered Bob



A.


When a cock or a clit gets engorged it can turn blue or slightly purple thanks to the blood rush to that area. If it STAYS blue/purple the next day, it means it is bruised. Clit must have had way too much fun the day/night before. Ice it and give it a rest. However, if it STAYS blue/purple it could be caused by an irritation of the vulva, known as Lichen Simplex or a plain ol' yeast infection, if so have her bring it in to her Doctor for a tune up ASAP.

Q.


I have been banging this 23-year-old girl who has the longest
and biggest pussy lips I have ever seen and I am 29.I mean it looks 
like she is giving birth to Mick Jagger, lips first.  

She isn't shy about getting naked and fucking but says she doesn't
like men going down on her. I assume it's because of her enormous trim.
Do lips like those mean she is a whore?
It looks like she's been pounded thousands of times, lots of mileage you know?
I am baffled but petrified to mention it to her.

Curious George
 
 
 
 

A.

Consider it a good thing that vagina's are all slightly different in appearance, smell, taste, etc. Just because her meat curtains happen to be longer than your last girl doesn't mean she is whoring it around. Just because a man has a huge cock doesn't mean HE is whoring it around (although they usually are because of the long line of people wanting a ride.
Labia size is usually hereditary, but is sometimes increased by taking the pill (or any hormones), aging, giving birth or from a ridiculous amount of sex, but having said that, there are many porn stars with tiny flaps, so you can't generalize vajay-jays apart from saying any pussy is better than no pussy, so don't look a gift pussy in the mouth, just be grateful you're getting some.

 Q.

My girlfriend says I'm too big for anal, although she's willing to try. Any tips for making it better for her?
Wonder Willy
 

 


A.

She needs to lie on her back and prepare to do it missionary style. Let her guide your cock with her hand, don't shove it rite in or she will veto the process rite away. Use LOADS of lube and be patient. It will hurt, no doubt about it, but if you start in this position it will hurt a tad less. Better her than me. OUCH!

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Q.

Do you think a couple can get back together after a divorce?
It has been 2 years since we divorced and I want her back again. I love her madly. I am not sure if she has moved on or not.
The way I feel right now it would be a miracle if we got
back the way we were. I really do love the girl but the one thing I think may kill that chance is since last May when we separated, I've been with other people since and I don't think she will take that well. I have to tell her the truth though, I can't lie about it. Do you think a girl would care about that or am I being paranoid for no reason?

Hopeful Hans

 
 


A.

Some say it's best not to reheat old soup, but it may work out if you don't marry her again. Try to start fresh, date her and don't ask her what she's been up to + avoid answering her when/if she asks. Just ask her to start fresh and leave the past behind. All that matters is that you still love her. Tell her "I've dated a bit, but could not get over you" and leave it at that. Don't offer any extra information as it may just hurt her and scare her off.

 
 

 
Q.



I am back in the dating game after a nasty marriage/divorce. I feel like a virgin which seems to feel good and bad at the same time. Bars
don't interest me, but pussy sure does, so I am out and about rather often lately. One thing I am dreading, is the question "how many
lovers have you had?" from the ladies (I am a fit 42 year old). You see, my wife was my first ever in bed. I was hers. I did slip up and
nosh a few women during our marriage, but still. I do NOT look good on paper as far as sexual experience goes. Should I lie and make
up a number? Or come clean and tell the ladies I am pretty much boring in bed thanks to lack of experience.



Innocent Ike



 

 

A.



 

One should NEVER answer this annoying (how many partners have you had?) question. You just can't win, so just say 
"not many, as I am very picky" . If they keep nagging you about it, remind them that the past is over and you prefer to 
focus on the present, which is all one really has.

 


Q.


Recently my girlfriends mom found out that our “friendship” has turned into “dating” and now her mom hates me and thinks I converted her daughter into being gay because in the past she's always dated men when actually her daughter had a crush on me and chased me.
Do you think her mom will snap out of it and accept our relationship or dislike me forever? We planned on spending the holidays together (Christmas & New Years) but my g/f thinks it's not a good idea because of her mom, but i think we should go ahead with the plans or else her mom will feel like she has the power to control our relationship and stop us from being together. Help.

Delicious Dike

 

 

 


A.


First of all, the Holidays are extremely over rated and BORING, so if I were you, I would just be sweet as pie and tell your girlfriend "go ahead darling, do what you want to do, I will be fine and entertain myself. I just want you to be happy and have fun" which (1) makes you look like the easy going,
independent, understanding partner (2) gives you free time to do whatever you want during the mundane shopping spree called Christmas. You will save so much money not having to buy her ignorant family gifts and she will SURELY get bored out of her fucking mind and miss you so badly because of
your mellow attitude that she will probably sneak away from the judgmental witch to munch your carpet as often as she can. Do NOT waste any energy trying to please or piss off her family, just keep busy and remain patient and sweet to your girl and she will realize it's more fun to hang with you than a
controlling Mom. The more her Mom bitches, the better you will look to her.  You must be dam fun to divert her attention away from her usual diet of cock, so keep that in mind, chin up and keep smiling.

 

Ask Dr. Dot April 2010


Email me your questions and I will answer them for free and I will change your name to protect your identity. Your naughty secrets are safe with me 🙂

 

 

Q.


I have been dating this girl for about 2 months. We almost broke up two weeks in because she thought we were moving to fast.
She said we were having sex to often, but I was never the one coming on to her, she always came looking for me.
We eventually just went on, having regular healthy (great for both sides) sex. She text messaged me  describing what she was going to do to me sexually, but then after shopping with her, she texted me saying “I don't want to have sex for a while”  (so we didn't fuck after all). I asked her about it because I found it unusual. She didn't have much to say other then it's “not a big deal”.

I will admit the past two times we have had sex, it hasn't been the best. She seemed a little uninterested. When I asked her about this, if she was losing interest or what, she simply said  “well, I wasn't really in the mood but I fucked you anyways to please you”.  No girl has ever openly said such a thing to me, so I found it somehow sweet and endearing.  I just need a girls point of view on this whole thing… is it really not a big deal, that I'm blowing out of proportion?
Or is there something hiding behind this whole ordeal?  Any thoughts, suggestions would be appreciated. And by the way I'm 26 and she is 25

Horny Hans

 

 

 

A.

Not a good sign. If this is going on already, imagine being bound to her for the rest of your life. Imagine her saying "oh honey, you can fuck me if you have to, but I'd rather fold laundry, so hurry", as that's probably where this will end up if you stick with her, move in together or worse, marry her.
I'd keep your options open and play the field. You're too young for such restrictions. Best to have a girlfriend who wants to fuck you, rather than just tossing you a mercy fuck from time to time. Get out while you still can my friend.



Q.

A guy I have been seeing on and off for the last couple of years (we live in different countries) never, ever licks my pussy. I have a very clean tight twat and I know it smells and tastes good because other men tell me so and I often lick my fingers after masturbating.  He is considerably younger than I am so I have remained patient. I asked him flat out once "why don't you lick  my cunt?" and he replied like a smart ass "you never ask". This infuriated me and I almost ended contact with him. A while after wards I asked him, full stop on the phone, about this one way oral sex street we are on and he then came up with a new excuse, that I am older and he is afraid he won't be as good at it as any former lovers I have had. Do these excuses sound good enough to you? Am I over reacting?
I am extremely generous with giving head and I feel ripped off.

Oral Ora

 

 

 

A.


He sounds like a lazy sack of shit to me. Trying and failing is still better than not trying at all. Age has nothing to do with it either. You can't let him off easy all the time just because he is younger. When does he plan on learning? When he is 50? It's hard to teach an old dog new tricks. Suggest teaching him how to do it exactly as you like it. The fact he said "you never ask" shows he is being a selfish prat. Hold off on those generous blow jobs and if/when he asks why you stopped, give him a taste of his own medicine and tell him "ladies first" and guide his thick head down towards your neglected cunt. If he still refuses, show him the door. There are plenty of men around, of all ages,  who love to lick pussy.

 

 

 

Q.


Why is it hard for a 45 year old man to cum but still maintain a rock hard penis. It's like "the feeling" or "itch" want to rise but just doesn't. I also tend to get hot (body temperature wise). My beautiful girl comments that my penis always tends to make me sweat first before I cum. Now sometimes I do cum and it usually always explodes out as if there is a blockage in the valve and the pressure just pushes it out. I'm aware I might have a control issue as I generally don't have a problem masturbating. Rarely however, do I cum during intercourse. I don't hammer away, sometimes I go slow, sometimes I wiggle about – depending on how my partner is feeling or wants.


Diamond Dick-Dave

 



A.


It sounds to me like you and your cock are very dehydrated. When a person isn't drinking enough water, the body tends to get selfish and holds onto every drop of fluid it has. Avoid excess coffee and tea, which simply dry you up from the inside out. Drink at least 8 glasses of water a day and go to a Urologist to have the "blockage" checked out. Blockages can occur as a result of infections (including STD's). These can be cleared up by taking antibiotics. If you have a structural blockage, you may need to undergo minor surgery. So a trip to the “Cock-Doc” and drinking more healthy fluids should cool you and your hot willy off and make ejaculation easier.

 

 

 

Q.

I am 24 and left my boyfriend (age 26) of four years for another guy. Then my relationship with that guy went bad and we broke up. When I first left my ex I heard many friends tell me how they had seen him constantly out drinking himself stupid in the corner of bars by himself and he looked unhappy. He used to email me telling me he missed me and still loved me, I was polite but not really interested. He stopped emailing, then friends started seeing him out with other girls and then one day he ran into me at a coffee shop and it seemed like he had been living in the gym, the guy was ripped. I added him on facebook and see a lot of girls always flirting with him on there including girls I know. I am shocked he has gone from the dotting depressed ex boyfriend to this. What's the best way to win back his heart and start dating again without looking stupid? I would also be very upset if one of the girls in my social circle try to fuck him and I fear they might. Help……

Goldie Cocks



A.

The good news is, men can forgive. But they don't forget. If he really loved you, he may give you another chance. The other girls may be different and new to him, but sometimes a history between people can mean more than fresh meat. You can send him a real letter; not an email and tell him you are sorry and that you know for sure leaving him was a grave mistake. Mention that sometimes it takes such a stupid move to make one realize how good they had it and how grateful they should be for what they have/had, the grass always seems greener but it isn't, yadda yadda yadda. Make it short, sweet and to the point. He won't want to read a book, just one short page of how you would love to see him again. That's all you can do. Do NOT call him as you may catch him at a really bad time and that could make things worse. A letter is less threatening and gives him time to think. You may want to slip an old picture of you both into the letter to spark memories (and a few nude self portraits too of course). If he doesn't answer you, it means he's moved on and nothing can change a man's mind once he has it set. If he does start fucking around in your social circle, you just have to write it off as "the one that got away" and remember they are experiencing your left overs.




Q.


Is it true what they say that "once you go black you never go back”?


Wondering Wanda

 



 
   


A.


I'm sure that rumor was created by a black man. I've seen plenty of naked black men as I am also a massage therapist by profession+ most take off their clothes.


They don't have bigger cocks than other men, it's just that the ones who do have massive dicks are in porn, hence the reputation. I've never fucked a black man (would shag Chris Rock if he wasn't married + was given the chance). Not racist at all, but I prefer light eyes on my lover (green or blue) so that narrows it down considerably for me now doesn't it?

 

 

Q.

 

I have been dating this girl for about 5 months, and I cannot seem to make her climax. It seems like no matter how long we go I always end up going first, and then going limp. I have never had this problem before, and am used to being told that we have to stop and not getting to jizz all over the place, then finishing the deed later by myself. I don't know what I am doing wrong with her. We try different positions and I ask her what she needs to make her get there (she is shy) and still I don't get the satisfaction of her screaming in joy from a little present that I gave to her.. Is there any way I can extend how long it takes me to cum, to be able to hold a stiff dick after I come or to loosen her up so that she climaxes' harder faster?


No-Go Jo



A.

She needs to know how to make herself cum before she can cum with you. Ask her in a nice, calm manner, how she makes her self cum. If she says she can't, there is your answer. It's not you, it's her. If she says she can and tells you how, ask her to SHOW you how she makes herself cum. Then try to integrate that method into your fuck fest. If she doesn't know how to cum (some women just don't). Then bring her ass to the edge of the bed, kneel on some pillows and lick her clitoris as long as it takes to make her cum. Don't worry about sticking your fingers in there, just concentrate of long, firm, constant strokes with your tongue as wide as you can make it. Lick South to North and vice versa and check in with her once in a while and ask her if that's the right spot/ rhythm. Don't let up until she cums. It could take a while but if that is your goal, you have to hang in there. Make her cum first then you won't have to worry about how long it takes you. It didn't sound like she was complaining about you taking forever to cum, some girls like a long ride. Women can enjoy sex without climaxing. We don't have to climax every time to enjoy it, like most men do.



 

Twitter

I feel sooooo guilty for not blogging properly in so long. I am so mad busy. I use twitter daily as it is easier and I can do it anywhere. I am on twitter as dr_dot by the way.

 

Looking for an apartment in the NYC area as I need more space, office space etc. My company is official now, so I am working my tail off to get things all lined up. Weather is GORGEOUS here in NYC lately, Spring is finally at our door. Not even bothered about going back to Berlin until Jasmine heads over. I do miss a few certain people but I do NOT miss being hated on a daily basis just for being an American. We can not choose where we are born. BUT we can avoid places that hate us innit? I can not help it that Berliners hate Americans. It is COOL to hate Americans over there. No matter HOW hard you try or even if you don't try, you just can't win, they just fucking hate Americans. Sucks because Berlin is such a pretty city with lots to do, but it wears you down defending yourself over and over again. I have just grown tired of it now and what bad timing too, as I just had found my dream apartment with the help of a dear friend last August. FUCK I always do everything backwards. All those years in Berlin in and out of shitty apartments and now that I am done with it, I find my dream apartment. OMFG!!!!!!!!

It is 5am, just NOW done answering today's emails, that is why I never blog, I am so swamped, answering emails, by the time I am done, the last thing on my mind is writing (or even wanking). BUT my face hurts from laughing so much here in the states. People LOVE TO LAUGH here. Makes live so much easier. Berliners, take note. 

 

Gotta sleep

x

 

Maggie and I at karaoke