It's embarrassing how much time has passed since I met and massaged Jeff Beck and I am just now blogging about it. I think it was 8 weeks ago?
Nevertheless, he is fresh in my mind. Jeff is SO FUCKING FUNNY, he could just hang up the guitar and do comedy, but his main passion, I found out, is restoring old
cars, working on them, making them gorgeous… I think he LOVES music, but just does it still to support his car hobby 🙂
The man hasn't an arrogant bone in his body, so polite and humble, so real, so fucking cool! I was in heaven that day, sun was shining, Jeff Beck on guitar, Vinnie Colaiuta on drums, the band was amazing. Buddy guy opened and I could HEAR him play through the open window in the dressing room (it was an outside gig at little castle) but I couldn't see him as I was busy massaging Jeff and Vinnie. I know Vinnie from his days with Zappa and then later, Sting. Vinnie is hysterical as well, so my face hurt from laughing the next day.
Jeff told me a lot of funny things that happened to him in his life and about his relationship with Roger Waters, who I had just massaged recently as well. Roger is a HUGE Jeff BECK fan and he "felt honored" to have Jeff play on his 'Amused to Death' album. A LOT of people want to hire Jeff, but he is simply too busy and sometimes can't be bothered. He does what he wants and when he wants it, but is never arrogant about. I have heard first hand that he was chosen to be the next Rolling Stone after Brian Jones died but just never hung around for the audition. He just didn't give a shit. It's an amazing balance he has, being that confident but not at all arrogant, one that I have seldom come across in show biz. I doubt he has any enemies, they all love him and want him to play with their band, but Jeff is hard to get, just naturally, not a calculated hard to get, if you know what I mean.
The show was predominately male (ladies, keep that in mind, if you want to meet COOL men with great taste in music, go see ANY Zappa tribute band, Steve Vai and/or
Jeff Beck in concert, you can have your pick!). Jeff's show was only instrumental. He said sometimes he has some woman on tour with him singing (forget her name)
and she sounds ike Janis. Of course when I heard that I sang him a few bars of Bobby McGee and told him I am for hire (heh heh).
I stood in front of the stage watching him in awe and my friend was chatting a bit to me (not loudly) about something that had just happened in the crowd and a
Jeff Beck fan screamed "How the FUCK can you talk during a Jeff Beck guitar solo!????". Nuff said.
Vinnie warming up backstage I didn't realize my new camera was on 'video mode' ^ *DOH!*
VInnie is So adorable, so fucking fun! Last time I saw him was when he was on tour with Sting, and I think that was 9 years ago. He and Terri Bozzio are the best drummers around (yes, I LOVE John Bonham, I am talking living drummers). Vinnie doesn't even know how many fans he has. He just plays, He is so straight now, no booze, no smoking, just music and that's it. Sooner or later the rockers realize they have to get and stay healthy if they want to remain in the strenuous rock and roll circus and that includes getting a massage whenever possible. They know when I am around, they are in for extreme deep tissue and they know I will make they cry like babies. They love it. My massage team is known for it's brutal capabilities and we have been labeled the 'Pit Bulls of Massage'. Music to my ears *sigh*.
If you want to hear Vinnie on a great Frank Zappa cd, just get "Joe's Garage" and you will see why he is so sought after….
< when he toured with Sting
After the show, Jeff and I were standing in the production office and he was pouring very expensive champagne into my glass
and my friends glass too (Jeff is SUPER generous!). We were just shooting the breeze and telling jokes when a German security guard came up to
us and since she knows me (I am rather known here in Berlin) she looked and us both and said "well, there are many fans out side and they want to know
how long you will be back here" and before anyone had a chance to say anything I belted out "tell them I am busy and they will have to wait".
Jeff and I both burst out laughing. That's the kind of humor Jeff has, not stiff at all, he loves a good laugh. Love him!
^ Jeff's reaction when he found out where the 'Cosmopolitain' drink was made famous
After the show my friend (male friend by the way) and I were invited by Jeff to join them all on the bus (don't make a fuss, just get on the bus) for
some "special" drink that Jeff likes to make everyone. Of course we came along happily, it's not every day, nor every year Jeff invites you for some bevy's.
We were all cracking up and exchanging stories, and Jeff played bar tender. He was so excited to mix this drink for me, one he thought I had never heard of before.
He handed it to me and said "this, my dear, is called a "Cosmopolitan". Now, any girl who was hooked on "Sex and the City" like I was has heard of that drink years ago.
I was like "uh, Jeff, that drink was made famous on Sex and the City". He was like "eh?" . He had never seen it. I explained that it's a show that had 4 women on it and they always talked about men and went out and drank that drink. He went "WOT!??? I've been making and drinking a GIRLS DRINK!???" The whole bus roared with laughter.
Vinnie wanted a foot massage on the bus, so I gave him one. He made faces and noises like I've never seen before. I said "you sound like me the first time I had anal sex"
Again, the bus was hysterical. I am telling you this lot knows how to laugh, even the bus driver was hilarious. If you see Jeff Beck heading to a town near you,
it will be worth every penny to go see him, he is the BOMB!!!!
Moving right along. I got a new camera, as you can see and I am trying out the video options as often as possible.
This is a view from my favorite town in the USA, Hoboken. Hoboken is better than NYC because it is only 5 minutes away from NYC
yet still clean, safe, cheaper, friendlier, etc. I just LOVE that place… I walk down the street and I seem to know everyone and vice versa.
I love that small town feeling, but I have to have the big city at hand, and as you can see from that video, it's REALLY at hand..
Jet lagged as FUCK in Hoboken ^
ps. Flying back and forth is killing me. You can't bring any lip stick, lotion, powder, tooth paste, you can't bring FUCK ALL on the plane anymore, which makes my Pet Peeve, flying, even worse now. They do sell, however, expensive as FUCK lotion etc, on board, how convenient, those wankers! Yeah, you Hetro men won't have a clue what I'm on about but us ladies/queers know, we need lotion and chap stick at least or we dry up like raisins. I put some lotion into a condom, tied it into a knot and crammed it up my, yeah, there. You have to be smarter than the average bear to make things happen. So I had my lotion! heh heh.
Adam (fuck you Adam for saying I "SUCK" cause I was busy heh heh and MECHEL, a girl who totally understands me and thinks the same way I do about men.
I didn't have much time to play recently in NYC but I did manage to see some of my friends….
Danny ^ who is one of my few Gay friends. I can't tolerate most Gays, they are so catty to me about my big tits *MEOW*!!!, but Danny is great!
I think he looks like Wil Farrel, don't you?
Eike drove ALL the way from Hamburg to Berlin to play as our (BITCHFEST ) opening act last Wednesday. He
didn't earn much but was not whining about it, he played like a PRO! We will do a song together, the man has talent.
Click HERE to see Eike's myspace page…
Eike is a MAD Frank Zappa fan, like me, so it was so fun to hang! I gave him a Project Object shirt
that was too big for me…. This is my "Dangerous Kitchen" by the way ^
This was our official 2nd show as BITCHFEST. What pissed me off is the FUCKING FOG. Here it's not too bad
but at some points I couldn't (1) Breath (2) see the audience or my band. WTF!??????
For me the BEST part of the show was watching Jasmine climb up on stage and then crowd surf. Then, during
Back in Black, I did as well. This was my first time crowd surfing and it was fucking FUN! I will do this from now
on. How often does one see a daughter, then the Mom crowd surf at the same show? It was fucking hilarious.
I had to have a word with the German crowd though, as at first the crowd surfing didn't work. Jasmine and her friends
were just let down, as in, dropped. I was like "hello, you're supposed to catch and carry the bodies, not stand there and sip
your drinks and laugh". They finally got the hang of it and it was marvelous. The sound man made a crappy video and sound
recording and when I figure out how to up load it, i will post it. You can see Jasmine surf and then me for a bit too).
A back view of BITCHFEST –unfortunately, none of our drummer, Sansi, this time 🙁
From left to right, Vitri (back up vocals, Chrisi (drummers girlfriend, me and Danielle, back up vocals ^
Dr. Cock likes to draw cartoons, this one is of He and I ^ My friend Martin^ (Aussi) and some unknown dude backstage
Um, after the show, we had fun with my camera… don't ask.^
Dot welcomes audience
You really Got me < Back up singers come on stage
Heart Breaker < Back up singers
Dirty Deeds < Back up Singers (leave stage After Dirty Deeds)
Dot introduces band
Highway to hell
*Back up singers come back on stage, Dot introduces them
Piece of my Heart < Back up singers
Back in Black < Back up Singers
BAND LEAVES STAGE
SANSI (drummer) COMES BACK ALONE FIRST AND DOES:
(whole band comes out now)
Whole Lotta Love
Twist and Shout < Back up singers come and sing and twist/dance
Our set list ^
I have known "Fricky" since 1992. He is really strange, an artist. He let me draw the Zappa stache on him, yes! ^
Danielle, me and Sarah (she is from Sweden) partied ALL night after the BITCHFEST show…..
THIMO my guitarist will cheat on us this Wednesday 🙂 ^
Check him out, he ROCKS!!!!!
< The newspaper the next day, after the BITCHFEST show….
< BB is the KING!
I saw BB KING live this past Thursday. It was one of the best show's I have ever seen. He almost had me in tears
when he told the crowd he would never be passing through this town again, as he is "80, almost 81 years old" and his health
isn't the greatest. I had to literally swallow my tears. He was so charming and funny how he told the crowd so many tiny stories and
his voice, Jesus, even if he didn't play a mean guitar, I would pay to just hear the man sing. BB, I LOVE YOU!!!!!