Maroon 5/ NYC

Today on MTV total request live (TRL) around 3:30 pm, see Adam Levine do his thing. Great guy!

I massaged him again last night here in NYC, then went out for some karaoke. Karaoke in NYC rules. I am having so much fun here, I hate to leave. I will return to Berlin in a few days to see my cutie pie, Jasmine. I have a massive blog, well, two massive blogs to write. I still haven't done my Monte Carlo and London blog. OMG, I will never get these done 🙁

I am pretty sure that I will be living back in NYC again by the Fall. I will still keep my flat in Berlin, but being back in the US with friends, family and loved ones is so nice. Just walking down the street is fun, everyone smiles, they are enjoying life, having fun, being friendly; it's so refreshing, I miss that! I will still have to visit Europe often, as I love it too. Wish I could split myself in two and live both places at the same time. I will be back again in NYC for just about the whole month of August, as I have to get my tonsils removed. Not looking forward to that. Hope it doesn't change my singing voice. I don't want to be a soprano or so. I need my AC/DC voice! 😀


Dr. Dot


 "We can never know about the days to come
But we think about them anyway, yay
And I wonder if I'm really with you now
Or just chasin' after some finer day

Anticipation, anticipation
Is makin' me late
Is keepin' me waitin'

And I tell you how easy it feels to be with you
And how right your arms feel around me
But I, I rehearsed those lines just late last night
When I was thinkin' about how right tonight might be

Anticipation, anticipation
Is makin' me late
Is keepin' me waitin'

And tomorrow we might not be together
I'm no prophet and I don't know nature's ways
So I'll try and see into your eyes right now
And stay right here 'cause these are the good old days

(These are the good old days)
And stay right here 'cause these are the good old day"

 by Carly Simon 

Ask China to keep its tiger trade ban in place

Fewer than 5,000 tigers remain in the wild. In the last 50 years alone, three sub-species of tigers have gone extinct in Asia.

China banned the domestic trade in tiger parts in 1993. But in an attempt to reopen this trade, large scale tiger farms in China are breeding tigers at a frightening rate to produce tiger products for commercial trade such as tiger bone wine, misleadingly promoted as traditional medicine.

Ask China to keep its tiger trade ban in place. Your views will be personally conveyed to China's leaders.

Click  HERE to sign 


Click  HERE to sign 

Connecticut (home sweet home)

I was in NYC, but drove a few hours, now I am in CT, where I was hatched, for a few days. Seeing relatives and friends, lovin' life. The air is so fresh here, the people so friendly, live is so easy here. I try to imaging living back here, like I did when I was born (from age 0 to 5, then again from age 15 to 18). Would I get bored? Would they stone me to death for being so scandalous (with my sex column and massaging rock stars?). Could it be possible the only places I 'fit in' now are NYC, Hoboken and Berlin? Jasmine would never live here and I am not sure she would even visit again, since her last couple visits here were for her, boring and unpleasant. But she will soon roam the world and probably settle in NYC and go to college. But I have to come back here more often, I feel at home here somehow and also, Hoboken makes me feel at home too though. Uncle Jack says I am a Jersey girl, since my Grandma and Mom were both born in NJ. Hmmmmm. I have to get to bed, Lisa's cats will be down early to wake me up with their cat nip breath. 

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
 Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

 ^A picture I took of Steph on my sofa before I left Berlin. She is an American living in Berlin, super fun to hang with.. 

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket < Uncle Jack and his son Jerimiah (I guess this makes me his Aunt? Auntie Dottie)

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket < Frankie, my love x

Lisa's pride and Joy ^ 

Unfortunately I haven't had a ride on her bike yet, it's been pissing down rain since I got here. Boo fucking hoo. 


Lisa, me and "Brie" at the "Hall of Fame" (previously called The Country Squire) in Ellington, Connecticut (my old high school  stomping grounds). The air smells of cows here. I had the Ramones play here a long time ago, when I was dating Joey. Long story  (you can read it on my RAMONES blog on myspace fyi)

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Somers (CT)  Lads, after a long night of hard core karaoke  

I will write more when I can. I still have to do my Monte Carlo and London blog. Freakin' hell, my ass will flatten out from all this sitting. NOT!

Lisa hits Berlin

My friend Lisa , who I first met when I was 16 in Rockville, Connecticut, finally left the USA and came to visit me here in Berlin. It was her first time in Europe and we went nuts taking pictures. She took too many for me to post here, but here are a few.


Can you believe these posers charged her 2 Euros for this shot? Capitalists.


< I just bought this stuff and Lisa was the first to try it. Better her than me.

 We HAD to visit the local Harley shop so Lisa could stock up on Harley t-shirts, etc, for the folks back in Vernon.

I brought Lisa to White Trash, we felt at home there. heh heh. ^


A somber place  ^

Pascal, one of the only bikers I know in Berlin, having a brew with Lisa at the Hard Rock Cafe ^

He BARELY speaks English, so they had the biggest communication problem I've ever witnessed. It actually gave me a flaming head ache listening to them "talk". DOH!   

The relentless  and verbally abusive DJ ^  at Cafe Klo (he will rip you a new asshole)

Lisa at Cafe Klo (Klo is a nick name for Toilet in German). Those silly Germans & their toilet humor. Everyone there drinks out of Urinals; you know those tiny ones you pee in when you're stuck in bed at the Hospital?

Lisa, the man magnet, had fun letting the local guys try on her new Harley Jacket. Schwing.

 < Lisa took this great shot of the "Siegessäule" which means "Victory Statue". The French gave it to the Germans as a present. Whatever.

Lisa in wonderland ^



Our pal Roar showed Lisa around to things that I probably wouldn't have, like the Olympia Stadium. Nice shot.

WTF? ^ Makeup your fucking mind. Are you a Zebra, Ant eater, Horse, deer, Hyena, Giraffe?…..  Look at the cute Meerkat. I lingered here the longest, as I am a big fan of their show "Meerkat Manor ", they have their own reality- show! CUTE!

I am torn. I love to see Lions, but when I see them like this, behind bars, my heart aches 🙁

< Knut with his caretaker

Lisa arrived during the Knut "mania". This little polar bear was abandoned by his mother and they Berliner Zoo was going to put him to sleep. So many people protested, they decided to let him live. When Shai, Lisa and I arrived at the Zoo at 3:45 pm, they told us, "Too late, no more Knut today" and we almost threw ourselves on the ground and had a temper tantrum. They didn't have that info on their web site (that you can only see Knut from 11am to noon and then again from 2pm to 3pm). We went in anyways (it cost about $20 to get in) and we had a lovely day anyways, so there.

  Dj Big Bear . Our favorite Karaoke DJ in Berlin ^ He has NO attitude, No ego, doesn't hog the mic or sing unwanted back up and he has the biggest song selection around. LOVE HIM!

Lisa, after 6, yes SIX double shots of Jaegermeister and a few beers, me and Shai. Lisa is made of steel.

Lisa's karaoke set list: "wanted dead or alive", "I've got friends in low places" and "Born to be wild". Nuff said.

'' < HOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

< Steph doesn't remember posing for this pic.

^ Those bikes are ALL over Berlin. You call the number on the bike, give the operator your credit card info, and they unlock it over the phone. You get charged per kilometer. Strange, but practical.

 < it's love

Lisa made it home safe and immediately fell into the arms of  her new Harley ($25,000 worth)

I am heading to NYC on Monday, yes! I LOVE NEW YORK


Ask Dr. Dot May 5th 2007

  I am the Husband of Tainted Tammy that has been writing you, you know "THE BITCH"
that gets it 5 times a week, for which I am extremely thankful for. My side of it
is that when we 1st met I let all my skeletons out of the closet which weren’t a lot
 but I was a recreational intravenous drug user, (did it about 10 times my whole life)
 I got involved with a bad bunch of people and I was the ride for the most part and
 didn’t have much of a sex life due to an abusive up bringing at the hands of my
father both physically
 & mentally since I was a wee boy. When it was her turn she told me she lost her virginity
 @ 17 to a guy that was 21 & he raped her, so I said to myself @ that time "no big deal
 she had sex with this guy 1 time it wasn’t her fault and that was the end of it" now
18 years later she is telling me it was an ongoing sexual
relationship and each time I bring it up the story changes, I was so angry at this guy
 that I was going to inflict physical damage to him and get even as he took my wife’s
purity from me but now that the truth has come out I feel I can’t hurt this guy because
 now I see it was consensual on both parties. This all could’ve been avoided  if she was
 just up front from the beginning; I would have married her anyway but I almost feel
like she got me on false pretenses, I love her with all my heart but the deceit really
 hurts after all these years, thanks,
Mr. Bitch

That part was left out in her email to me; I didn't know she was lying about her past.
 But the past is the past and I totally frown upon the idea of digging up one's
“skeletons”, unless there’s children involved. Since you were abused in the past,
honest and purity must be extra important to you; hence her blurry past is eating you
 alive. Take her for a walk and have her tell you the whole freakin’ story once and
for all. Say "tell me the truth and I shall drop it forever!". Let her vent and keep
 your word, just let it slide, otherwise it will just be a constant annoyance and it
will drive you both apart.
If you love each other and want to stay together, you need to clear this shit up. She
 said you were “depressed and
not the same anymore.” Why not tell her why? You have to communicate or it won't work.
Just because you weren't the first guy IN your woman, doesn't mean she isn't pure. She
has been with you for years, and she has sex with you very often, that shows that her
love for you is pure. You can't beat that. Let the past die, it's over, done with and
know that we all make mistakes.
(*note: the wife has since written  and they’ve cleared everything up and are happy
as clams in water)


I’m pregnant and very horny most of the time. My husband seems to be into it. We got
married recently and he wanted kids right away, so here I am, pregnant and jealous.
My first husband cheated and I’m paranoid again. I try to keep telling myself men cheat.
I don’t ever want to be divorced again. I know if he did cheat I would have to cheat
just to build up my ego also. I already have a child and realize how hard it is on a marriage.
 I’d like to feel like I shouldn't have to worry. I’m a pretty sexual person and love my
 husband and would like to feel like he only wants to be with me. He tells me he’s waited
his whole life for me and wanted to be married and have a baby. He is  37 and I’m hoping
he is really ready for all of this. He has been doing whatever he wants for so long.
Are all men going to cheat no matter what?
Nervous & Knocked-up

Some men cheat; so do some women, but there are those that are satisfied with what they have.
 The way you described your husband made it sound like he initiated the marriage and
pregnancy, so you really don't have to worry.
Had you trapped him in a marriage due to an "accidental" pregnancy, well, then it would
be a whole different situation. Your sex drive and confidence will keep everyone happy.
Worrying while pregnant isn't good for the baby at all and it's pointless to stress about
something that hasn't happened, so just breath deep and enjoy your bun in the oven and the
hot baker who helped make it.

My fiancé says he is scared he can't have kids because his cum looks
like water. What is this caused by & is he able to have kids still? He has not had a sex
drive since his ex gave his baby up for adoption. When we do have sexual intercourse he
only last 5-15 mins.
Quickie Queen

Sperm consistency always varies. Diet, exercise and frequency of sex can all dictate how
thick or watery his juice will be. Sperm is constantly being made. Even if he just shot
his load, a new batch is already in the making and you never know if it will be clear,
cloudy, thin or chunky style.
Semen quantity differs among individuals and can also change during different times of a
man’s life. Older men usually make a milky or pearly-white spunk and if the guy doesn't
empty his balls regularly, it can turn a bit yellow and get really thick like clam (OMG!)
chowder. A lot of factors go into the appearance and consistency of semen, including diet
and ejaculation frequency. Changing any of these can alter the way your semen looks.
A nocturnal ejaculation may have more prostate fluid in it (which is whiter and thicker),
while a daytime ejaculation may have more sperm and fluid from the seminal vesicles, which
tends to be clearer and less viscous. You say he already produced a child, so I would tell
him not to worry about being impotent AND you say his sperm is very watery, so if he isn't
fucking you, he must be wanking a lot, when you aren't around. This may help him feel (1)
Good (2) In control. Since he lost control of his child, wanking may make him feel in control
 of at least his cock. If he is that afraid, he should go to the Doctor and have it checked
 out but I think it would be a waste of time and money and make an already tense, unfortunate
 situation become that more tense, hence killing his sex drive even more. Just avoid talking
about it and give him some sexy back rubs while wearing some hot undies. Try to have him get
 you off before he even attempts one of those 5 minute in and out escapades. Tsk Tsk!

Why is it I can only cum when I think about my husband having sex with his ex girlfriends?
Any details he has given me race through my head and I act them out while
Fucking him and that is the ONLY way I can get off. I’ve never told him as I am afraid he
would think I am nuts. Am I?
Pervy Pam

Wanting to love your partners past, right down to the juicy parts is nothing to be ashamed
or freaked out about. A lot of people have to let their mind wander while fucking to cum,
as sometimes the here and now is either too much or too little and letting your imagination
 take over to get yourself off is a common pastime. I think it means you are just very into
 his sexuality and imagining him fucking other girls is a turn on. A few people I know have
 admitted to doing the same thing, just relax and enjoy your home made, in-house porn.

I am also a massage therapist and want your opinion. Sometimes when I massage male clients,
they do obnoxious things that make me feel very awkward. For example, some point their penis
 South when they lay on their stomachs and I massage their back and back of their legs. I
then have to look at their cock the whole time and this grosses me out. Another popular antic
 is some men lift their asses up off the table so they are almost kneeling. What the hell?
This makes me so nervous, I am thinking of just massaging females from now on.
Miss Massage

Simply ask the client to “Please point your member North so I don’t accidentally graze it
 with my short fingernails” should frighten their cock as soon the words leave your mouth.
 If they moan about it, insist you can’t concentrate and/or cover “it” with the sheet/towel
 and only work on one side at a time, keeping his jewels covered. You could be cheeky and
say “Look, it’s bad enough I have to see your balls squished onto my massage table, do us a
 favor and pack your meat up under your belly”. Humor helps in stiff situations. If they have
 their ass up in the air, it means their ass is an attention whore, so why let it down? Put
one hand on top of your other hand and use full force when slamming his ass down onto the
table. He will get the message loud and clear without you even speaking. If he asks, tell
him it’s the “Slam dunk method”.


I love your columns I can't get enough of them. But I have a
question; what can I do to make my breast bigger without implants?

FlatChested Ann

All of these babes have no boobs, but are still smokin' HOT  ^ 

Thanks Ann. You could eat more, get chubbier and/or take the birth control
pill which simulates pregnancy, hence, slightly bigger jugs
(downside is that you also get that clingy insecure sense of being
that pregnant women get) and smoking while on the pill is dangerous
(as if smoking wasn’t dangerous enough). If none of that sounds enticing, just
 work on ass and make your oral techniques something to write home about.
 Not ALL men are breast men.

I've been married for 17 years to a wonderful man. We have a major problem however.
  I hate giving him a blow job, there is nothing about it I like.  He really wants
 it and I don't see myself giving it to him. What and how do we make this compromise?
 We fight about it all the time. Please help!
Anti Oral Audrey

If he’s so wonderful, why not show him some appreciation and give him what he wants
 at least once in a while?
I am sure there are some things he does for you that he really could live without.
 Men NEED blow jobs and if you don't give them to him, he may look elsewhere. There
is no way around it I'm afraid.
Knowing it brings him absolute pleasure should at least turn you on. Just be happy
 he isn't insisting on anal sex.

I thought I finally found 'the one' in my boyfriend of ten weeks but he has a habit
 that I am not sure about. We are both over 30 and have steady income but he
likes to shop-lift. It's not like I accidentally caught him, he steals then tells
 me about it directly after, like a cat showing off a dead bird he just caught.
I suggested he go to therapy and he freaked out and screamed at me and said “no
wonder you were single for so long!” so he is obviously sensitive about this. At my
 age, single men are hard to come by so I am wondering if I should just let his habit
 slide or go through all the trouble of finding a new one AGAIN.
Lady Jane

I know people who have found love at age 55, 60 and even 65. Even Paul McCartney is
dating again! Never, ever take shit because you think you will expire soon. It is
never too late to find a partner. Your sticky fingered man sounds like a touchy,
shady character that has an inferiority complex. Does he think he is Robin Fucking Hood
 or what? Screaming at you because you suggested he gets help is as bad as his stealing
habit. He is a drama king, so much work; he exhausts me and I haven’t even met him.
 Be happy you found all this out now and not later as ten weeks isn’t that long.
You should be able to get over him in what, 2 days? If you have trouble letting go,
 imagine this kleptomaniac fathering your kids. Would he teach them to steal and shift
blame onto others when confronted? Drop that coward like a hot potato.

What do you think of my gift ideas?
1. Is a gift to my wife to have some of her favorite stuffed animals painted in that
famous painting of the dogs playing cards.

2. Is to make a mold of my cock, to make into a dildo. It would be in a factory sealed
package like you would find in a sex shop. To give out to chicks I know on Valentine's Day.

I would give it to chicks that would have sex with me if I was not married. What would
 you do if you got a gift like that from a guy you were cool with but never boinked?
Anaconda Al

I think you have way too much free time on your hands for a married man. The painting sounds
 sweet, but her glee will surely fade if she doesn’t know about your cock toys. If the
 girls you give them too aren’t single, be prepared for a major Bitchfest with their beaus.
 What would I do with such a gift? If the toy was extremely massive and had a challenging
 form, it would surely stir up my curiosity about the original, but would probably end up on
a shelf with the other toys, as nothing beats your own hand when it comes to doing the deed
alone. Toys are more a visual aide for your partners pleasure (“watch it go in; watch it go
 out, woop-de-fucking-dooooo!). ps. No one says “Boinked” anymore do they?

Dr. Dot t-shirts (oooh la-la)

I get asked fairly often if I sell Dr. Dot t-shirts so I recruited a talented friend of mine named Mark to take my idea (and hand and lip prints) and turn them into reality. Click on that banner above if you want to see the finished product. I am very happy with the results. I want to thank my pal Fet for making the banner 🙂

(my foot loved London ^ )

ps. I just got home from 8 days of planes, trains, automobiles and helicopters *sigh*. I was in Monte Carlo, then popped over to London and for the life of me, I can't decide which place is more expensive. What the FUUUUUCK… lol – I will blog as soon as I get a chance x