Dear Dr. Dot,
Hard to believe, but I am almost 30 and have never had an orgasm. The men I have sex with try as hard as they can to get me to cum, but it never happens. I end up getting pissed off at them and I throw them off of me in a huff. I have tired masturbating, and I can’t seem to trip my trigger, is it possible some people just can’t cum? Is it too late to learn? I am a very sexual woman, but I don’t climax, I feel left out, ripped off.
I think you’re better off learning how to make yourself cum before you put the guy through the maze. Make a hot date with yourself, sip some wine, have a hot bath, shave yourself nice and tidy, and pop your favorite porn into the player. Spread a blanket out on the floor and put two or three pillows vertically on top of each other, forming what will be your “man”. The floor is best for getting up into the hard to reach spot, also known as your clit. Cover pillows with a towel, as they will get wet. Have some lube and the remote control within reach. Lube up your favorite hand and lie on top of your hand and the pillows. No need to go inside, as the clit is what needs to be stimulated; this can be done easily by having your four fingers together (loads of lube) and rocking back and forth on top of your fingers (riding on hand which is between you and pillows). The pillows need to be vertical, as your legs should drape down on each side of pillows making more pressure on your hand/clit. Let go of all pointless thoughts, just get selfish and make sure you cum. Once you learn to do that, you will know what pressure and frame of mind it takes to trip your trigger. Some girls can make themselves cum on a guy much easier than having the guy make her cum. If you are a slight control freak, you may have to make yourself cum on the guy (you on top for example). As disturbing as it sounds, the clit is just like a tiny penis, in fact, some say it is. Treat it accordingly. Inner stimulation is fun, but the clit needs action to climax. Also, you could have an affair with your showerhead if it has enough pressure; bad thing is, if it’s too good, you may never leave the bathroom again. Keep me posted so we can celebrate your first orgasm.
I have had a streak of bad luck lately. The men I get in bed are usually packing a tiny penis or can’t get it/keep it hard. I am tired of this rumor “size doesn’t’ t matter”!! It does to me! How can I tell if a guy is gonna be good in bed or not, I am getting really impatient. Oh, I have never had a kid, so I am narrow down there if you get my drift; the men are simply “teeny weenies” around here.
A man with a tiny dick made up that “size doesn’t matter” rumor by the way. You sound like Goldie Cocks to me, too small, too soft.. You need to find the one that’s ‘just right’ for you. A sneaky but sure way to find out what he’s packing is make out with him and have an old fashioned grope session, like teenagers do. Feel all around his willy through his pants. Even under the pants would work, but you would have more trouble when you don’t like what you find getting out the situation. If you meet his willy and don’t think it is up to your size/texture standards, slowly go back to just kissing and say, I am sorry, this is all too fast for me, I need more time. Unless of course you have the balls to say “well, this isn’t what I was expecting, sorry!”. Good luck with that!