The last few days have been so gorgeous, even the buildings in the city are basking in the long awaited sun.
You get the idea, gorgeous weather, nice breeze through Central Park. I walked by the Dakota, where that ASSHOLE shot John Lennon on my way to the park. There are always people gathered out front, no matter what time of day or night. They are there to show love. I roller-bladed around the park one time, which is 7 miles. Dodging the many bikers and horse drawn carts, dogs on LONG leashes etc.
There were so many people on the Grand Lawn, I looked to see if Bob Dylan was in the middle somewhere playing or something, but no, just a normal sunny day in the park- packed full and happy.
I find the biggest problem in the park for women is finding a place to pee. There are only two places that I know of to go to and the lines are about a block long, so forget it. You can’t find a private bush or hope to drop your knickers real quick and have a pee without anyone seeing you, both ideas are absolutely impossible. There are always people around no matter what square inch of land you find in the park. I had to go to like 110th street ( which I think is already Harlem) and ask the NYC Bus Department if I could roller-blade in and use their bathroom. I was the only white cracker around for miles, but they let me. I personally never saw the black/white thing. I get along with anyone until they give me a good reason not to. After I used the bathroom, the bus drivers ( all black) were shootin’ the breeze with me, asking me to show them how to skate someday. I told them I can’t drive a bus, so we are even. We had a few laughs and I was off. Thinking the whole time how wierd it is that from almost one block to the next you go from million dollar apartments to Harlem, where it is obvious the people struggle for every dime they earn. I feel safe no matter where I go to, as the people can sense that I do not think I am better or worse then they are. It is all about how you carry yourself. Use your body language to let people know “he, it’s all good, let’s get along and forget this class/color bullshit!”.
Anyhow, after skating, I had a bit to eat at Dallas BBQ on 72nd street ( almost corner of Central Park West- near Dakota) and thought, why not let you know where my favorite places to eat are and maybe some favorite places to go etc, in the city. If you knew HOW fucking picky I am in restaraunts, you would know that if I suggest a place, it IS GOOD. I am no diva, but I can cook really well and if I go out to eat, it had better be much better than what I can cook or at least have perfect service. So, for food here we go:
Dallas BBQ ( think they have 5 or 6 locations just in Manhattan alone but the one on 72nd street is REALLY clean and has amazing service probably because of the neighborhood it is in, they want to be ready for when Mike Tyson pops in again)
Dallas BBQ is rather inexpenisve AND gives you huge portions, like this obnoxious thing they call the ONION LOAF:
I had to whip out my camera and take photos, prompting everyone around to laugh their asses off. I wondered how many calories are in that heap of onions and fat. It could feed a small country, it is about a foot tall! Anyways, they have BBQ ribs, chicken, baked potatoes, fries, corn bread, all that stuff and more ( I ate a salad and some of that Onion Mountain and was so full, I had to take my BBQ home and I just ate it, it was AWESOME). So, if you want down home cookin’ in the city and don’t want to spend a fortune ( or dress up) go to Dallas BBQ. You can stuff yourself for under $10!
Moving right along.
Yaffa Cafe: 97 St. Marks place between First ave and Ave A.
This place is open 24/7 everyday! You can get eggs, pancakes, salads, pasta, seafood, crab cakes, and incredible desserts. The best part about this place is the famous decor.It has paintings of Elvis, plastic friut everywhere, gilded statues and big tacky fountain out back for when the weather is fine. There is not one square inch of wall that isn’t decorated, so you will always have something to chat about. The prices are great! Again, you can have a meal, dessert and drink for under $15. Love it!
Sala: 344 Bowery at Great Jones street 1-212-979-6606 ( you may have to reserve a table on weekends).
This place is a bit pricey, average main course is about $17 ( not including drinks and tip!). I love it because it is an extremely romantic place, huge wooden doors that make you think you are entering a castle and it is lit up by candles everywhere. It is a Spanish restaraunt that has a breath taking wine list.Bread topped with garlicky saute’et mushrooms are just one of the many tasty tapas you can order. They have a downstairs lounge that has an almost Moorish setting of bead-encrusted blue tiled walls and most of the week they have a cool DJ there to entertain while you sip gorgeous wine. Anyone looks good here in the lighting and even the tables are covered in colored tiles that make up for the perfect setting for a date. Yummy, gorgeous, but expensive. Expect to pay around $65 for two people (or more if you drink a lot). Very polite service but tell them right away, you DON’T do tap water. ( I read that each glass of water in NYC has been in and out of at least 9 different people by the time you drink it! EW!)
44&X : It is called 44 times ten because it is on 44th street and 10th ave! Check it out their web site
I go to this place the most. I LOVE it. It is really right on the corner of 44th and 10th, and it is all glass, so you have a cool view of Hells Kitchen while you eat. In other words, there isn’t a bad seat in the place! All of the waiters ( 99% of them are gorgeous gay men) have on t-shirts that say “Heaven” on the front, and “In HELL” on the back. I have brought many stars here to eat and their managers too. They all love it. The menu is so bizarre, you can get anything here, buttermilk fried chicken with waffles and grits, or beef filet slathered with a sweet tomatoe jam and served with mashed potatoes mixed with butter beans or grilled short ribs over polenta. ( I only eat chicken as far as meat is concerned) . The salads are creative and desserts to die for. The wine is the best here I have ever tasted and the all white HUGE dining room, they always have cool music playing and there are too many waiters, so you never have to wait for anything! The menu has an Aisian and Southwestern mix to it, so everyone will be happy here it is AMAZING! Again, it is a bit pricey, so only go there with someone who wants to invite you to dinner (hee hee). I am getting hungry now just writting about the place! It is only open Mon-Wed 5:30pm-midnight; Thursday and Friday5:30pm to 12:30am;Sat and Sun 11:30am to 3pm then again from 5:30pm to Midnight. Enjoy!
Cafeteria: 119 Seventh ave ( in Chelsea) tel: 212 -414-1717 ( it is always packed, so you might have to call if you want a table).
This place is packed because Sex and the City has filmed there a few times and the food is good! It is not a place to go if you are a hetro female and want to pick up a hetro men. No no no. This is the gay area of Manhattan, so you won’t even have to make yourself gorgeous to go out to eat if you are a hetro gal ( which is a good thing). It is pretty loud and busy, lots of action. The menu is intersting ( the have green eggs and ham, like from the cat and the hat story, but they use pesto to make them green). Gorgeous salads and healthy foods. It doesn’t take long to eat here, the waitresses are lingering around like voltures in hopes you are finally finished and will get the hell out of there so they can seat the next paying customer, so you can’t linger here like you do in Starbucks. But it is thrilling, tasty and not that expensive.
By now you must be thinking, god, is that all you do is eat? Well, I do go out sometime to have a drink, but usually only to do karaoke. If you don’t know the name of my favorite karaoke places by now, why not? Find out what bar/club is having karaoke in NYC and the surrounding burrows buy clicking here .
Lucky Chengs is on 1st street and 1st ave ( almost on the corner) this is the now famous karaoke/transvestite chinese restaraunt/karoake club/bar that Britney Spears went to last week and was almost beat up by a jealous girl from the audience. Britney was apparently judging the boxers or brief contest and got a bit to touchy-feely with one of the male contestants.Anyhow, Lucky Cheng is exciting and a good laugh, but the transvestite karaoke dj will sabotage your song if you are a straight, good looking woman ( hence, competition) and this is a fact. The song list is SHIT and you can’t bring your own.
There are always men dressed as women and women dressed as men, and men who used to be women and vice versa fighting over the mirror in the “ladies” room. I think it is dirty and over-rated, but what the hell, check it out.
Other clubs that are fun, that have nothing to do with karaoke are: Niagra ,CBGBS ( both in lower east villiage) which both have a punk aroma to them, and Niagra used to be one of Joey Ramones hang outs. Also, Black and White ( think it is on 10th street between 2nd and 3rd ave) extremely cool music and on Sundays they have open mic for poets and story tellers. Free entrance.
If you are an ass kissing VIP follower, try to get into Bungolow 8 which is where all the big wigs hang out and go to see and to be seen/photographed. I have been there and almost got ill from all the brown-nosing I saw.
Anyhow, I may think of more later, but have to get my broken ass down to the Chiropractor and have him crack my bones.
Lovin this weather-
“Good day sunshine!” Beatles
ps. Naturally, if you are in the mood for the best massage in the world, I or one of my assistants can give you a rub down while you visit the city 😉